Anthea

Anthea Oct 2018

I'm healing now
Washing the debris from the beach sands he tainted
Letting my ocean of tears out for high tide
To scrape the memory of him from the land
I'm laying these feelings to rest
A cherry sunset in my chest
I'm healing still
And the warmth of the light against my Scorpio waters makes me feel better
Salty waves washing him further down
His litter resting on my heart’s floor
How long until he completely dissolves?
Regardless,
I think I'm healing now
Laying these feelings to rest
The cherry sunset in my chest

#love #sadness #breakup #unrequited #healing #self #beach

Anthea Oct 2018

Hypocrite

I'm angry with him and I still imagine the taste of his lips
I am full of ****
A hypocrite
Telling girl after girl to do better
While I touch myself to the thought of his rust colored eyes
His eyes that make me hate myself

#love #hate #abuse #self #esteem #feminism

Anthea Oct 2018

Juniper

Juniper tree on my lawn
I cannot trust you
Your branches give me shade
But your berries poison me
I cannot lean on this fragile juniper tree
For support
In the deepest of floods
I will bale out its roots
In the driest of droughts
I will water it with my tears
Sacrificing myself
To keep it thriving
Simply living to support others
When no one is supporting me

Oh juniper tree
When will you stop taking from me...

#love #friendship #abuse #support #sadness

Anthea Jul 2018

He's a Storm

He swept through town like a storm
And all night long I danced in his rain
His lightning lit up the skies
Brought the flowers back to life
I laid in the clouds and fell in love
It's drought again now that he's gone
The flowers wilt
The grass is burnt
My heart is empty like a hollow tree
The clap of his thunder filled me
And my ache grows stronger day by day
I look to the sky while I day dream
I see him in every passing cloud
Waiting for the storm again

I will wait for the storm again

#love #missing #longing #sad #storm #long #distance

Anthea Jun 2018

Wrong Time, Wrong Place

I hope he cares for me
I wish we could be closer
Because I'm certain this bud could bloom in his soil

I want to plant myself in him
But it's not the right time
It is not the right place

#love #forbidden #unrequited #sadness #hope

Anthea Apr 2018

If and When She Blooms

This stubborn seed
Won't sprout
The soil is tired like her heart
Crowded by weeds
This stubborn flower won't bloom
The night time frost of his cold emotions freezes her solid
She's the only dying flower in the garden
But still looking to the sky for a warm rain
Deadly nightshade
Is what this ground made her
From cold and neglect she blooms poison
Draining the life from the garden
Killing all the plants
This stubborn flower
Finally bloomed
And still no one wants to pick her

#flower #isolation #depression

Anthea Jan 2018

Still...

I still romanticize everything about you
Forgetting why we never worked
Letting my past out like the string on a kite
Letting your voice swoop me up like a storms breeze
With ease

I still notice the tiny details about you
Your nose like a roman god
freckles like the night time sky
Keeping my feelings in like the lock on an ancient chest
Keeping my mouth quiet like a hollow winter night
To make things alright

I still love you in a way
Not like lovers, a brother, or a friend
It's complicated
But I push it away like high tide to the sand
Push myself to get over you
Even though you don't have to

#love #rejection #unrequited #romance #sadness #emotional