the tears flow freely now but no noise as not to make an audience of my fake smile unraveling before them for them to see the wall coming down letting  the darkness seep from the debris for they will see the true me and cower in the darkness hidden inside me
not exploding but still self destructing
not imploding but still consuming

I think I'm stranded
The tides are changing and I'm stuck in the rocks
The water is neckdeep and  scared of drowning
Everyone has helped but that's why I'm not dead yet
They've done all they can and I'm alone
Please, please help, I don't want to drown

something holds me back in chains but no longer just my depression or my self hate but know by the ball and chain holding me down sinking me deeper and deeper into the end i don't know if i can escape no that's not right i don't know if i want to escape

I hate you
I hate every single thing about you
I hate the way you talk to me
I hate the way you look at me
I hate how you think less of me
I hate how you think you're so much better than me, you're not
You're the first one to speak and the last to listen
You're pathetic
It's pathetic the way you complain about your problems but never do anything about it
It's pathetic how much of an emotional leach you are,
And you're so **** ******* annoying,
Can you do anything els but complain,
I hate how you know me so well yet somehow don't endestand me at all,
I just really really hate you and I know you hate me too

Something is burning i can see the smoke it's black like the void in me that used to be happiness but know sadness resides in that void
something is burning i can smell it it smells like a purifying body left to decay left fore nature to consume left to rot away
something is burning i can feel it does not feel hot but rather it feels cold.cold like the warmth joy once gave me when i saw my friend's.cold like death the death within you the type you feel when you smile when talking to someone but you realize it's a mask
something is burning it taste like bitter sorrow it fills my mouth as luagh not out of joy but out of the psychotic realization that i'm alone
something is burning know and i know what it is

I am the on coming storm that can give life and take it, with no mercy hailing down on those under me lighting striking on those who try to rise up and leaving destruction in my quake but.... i didn't ask to be like this i wanted to be just that sun shiny ray that pierced through those clouds and showed you things weren't so bad but i guess not everyone can be that lucky and im stuck here making your day gloomy

I'm choking on my words
Maybe I should wash them down with my pride
Blinded by my own audacity
Maybe I should find
A moment of clarity so I can see
What you meant when you said
You where the death of me

I slowly sink here writing this wondering will anyone ever remember will these words be remembered or forgotten will we be remembered will anything be
or will we all be forgotten scientist say the sun will die in 5 billion years so we have up until then to make are mark to show we are worth more to show that we deserve not to be forgotten so i know that these words will be forgotten but hopefully i wont be

I sit here typing on my computer putting on a happy face for the world. I have trained mself to know when something is funny and how to hide myself behind these key's i type on but the truth is i am dying>i am dying from the overwhelming pressure put on my get good grades she says when i was young he says but i can't. i am dying from the hate put onto me by myself and others
mira él es tan gordo i hear them whisper their right i say to myself looking in the mirror.i sit here typing longing for death's sweet embrace wishing it would come sooner

I was so sure about the path I chosen,
It was like people already knew what I "thought" I wanted, so It didn't need to be spoken.
But what I thought I wanted, actually left me broken,
and I feel the regret coursing through my body,  but its the only thing that is keeping me breathing and my eyes open.
I feel confused about what I feel,
but feeling anything at all, is what ensures me that what's happening is real.
I'm confused about what path to take,
because I know that someone will get hurt with whatever choice I make.
But the one thing that's confusing me is... am I really confused at all?
Or am I scared and refuse to make a choice, because I know what happens next is my call.
I'm scared because I refuse to believe the truth,
that can be hard to handle for someone who's tolerance hasn't caught up with their youth.
I'm scared that I already know what path I want to go,
but refuse to let the truth show.
Am I confused about my feelings, or do I refuse to believe that I already know.
Should I try to solve the problem, or let things go on its on flow.

Confuse or Refuse,
which do I feel with the paths I have to choose?

um pleas answer i want to talk i think i'm depressed i put on a face all day trying to forget i'm dying i try to distance myself so i don't feel
l but not feeling hurts to. I've thought to end it too many times but i cant cause i'm too scared my dads always on my case about school because he got tired of F's and D,s. he called me a disappointment once .at school i don't have real friends just kids i talk to to numb the pain.   when i can't take it i put on another mask and cry under it because i don't want to deal with my sister's pity or my dads ******* advice about how his life ***** and he has no friend's  but he deals with it and he has us. but i don't have anyone but you but if you don't talk to me then who do i have no one. i've been grounded for a wile my dad took away my room i sleep on the couch eavry night know my clothes is in a box and fun fact all my belongings fit in half a box.

so yah pleas see this and respond it doesn't have to be related . just hi or something my party is on Saturday if you want to come ya peace

After long days and longer nights,
After Going to bed too late and waking too early,
After lying down in a cold bed and dreaming of a warmer one,
What comes next?

I'm a broken record stuck on the best part of the song but before it comes up it always need a slow dark part and i am infinitely stuck repeating the cycle hurting others as i replay myself