"You took your hunting knife and stabbed it in my back."
"Swiftly but not quickly, I was your precious prey."
"You caught me in a frozen state; taking advantage of the young, I was your prey."
"I thought that you loved me, I thought that you cared."
"But now I see the evil deep inside my daddy."
"Trusted him when I knew so little."
"Rookie mistake now give me a break."
"Those dagger eyes, piercing with grey, haunt my dreams and in my wake."
"I've let you define me, marking me with all kinds of pain."
"Bring my brush and paint, I'll tell you a story."
"The story of me, growing up saying sorry."
"It wasn't anyone to blame but him."
"Tore apart my soul, left me with no childhood."
"Trying to play the innocent father, but you shed the blood of your innocent daughter."
"Mother didn't know, what step daddy did."
"She was in love with him after my real daddy left.."
"That's what I don't understand, what type of man, takes away the trust of a child, right after her heart was healing?"
"Did you even think about the wounds you we're reopening?"
"My stomachs filled with moths, where butterflies should be."
"Eating at my insides,screaming internally."
"I always thought I could get rid of them."
"Only knowing one way how.."
"Selfish and cowardish, but I needed out."
"I needed help escaping my hell."
"Take the paint brush out of my hands, and carve your initials into my heart."
"In your sick way, you're always with me."
"You helped dig my grave."
"Good bye daughter, good bye sister."
"You took the life of a person, I wasn't a doll."
"Even dolls don't last forever."
"Now drop my casket into the ground, shocked and unaware."
"You'll be there with a smirk on your face."
"You broke me daddy, you won."

Snow so cold
So beautiful to the eye
Yet she Sits in the dark
Searching for the man inside
She lacks no intelligence
Yet, she searches with might
Trying to find courage
To win her fight
The battles are gallant
Doesn't seem quite so
Snow will do
what snow does best
Snow will fall
Letting the darkness consume her tattered soul
Would it be much easier
To give in to the darkness
blood pours from snow
Making white turn from red
From red to almost crimson black
It looks more horrid than it is
When they burry her body;
The song of death will play
After years of hearing it in her head
Others will hear instead
They will cry and hurt
Over the blackness
That ruined the purity of snow

I often like to lay; eyes closed among the ground, silent breaths, I make no sound. These are the times I myself wish that I would cease to exist. It starts getting lonely, your only friends are those marks on your wrists. I've been too busy hiding from others, but now I look around it's just me hiding under the covers. Under the blankets safe and warm, a place where dreams go to die. I feel unworthy of a compassionate touch the way it feels to hate my reflection, I'm the only person I can't love. I give second chances to everyone but me, it seems I myself is what's holding me back. Holding me back from being free

fire of my lungs

pain of my chest

cut on my lip

bruise on my neck

he is fire

he is pain

the one that drives me insane

the cut on my lip

the bruise on my neck

my life was his to wreck

he is the sun, the moon, the rain

*what is love without loss and life without pain?

i.

Elated, I'm afar from the aqua sphere beneath mine toe's,
I've been taken up by flight, an angel in the night;
A woman, a queen, a mystical paranormal beam,
God heard mine weeping, and with her he sent,
She dried mine Tear's clean.

ii.

I sniveled for eon's, with none hopeful lover's future
Mine joint's were weak, from the lack of nutritional feature's;
At mine lowest point, after imploring mine lord for help,
He sent me mine other half, Earl Jane Nagley, an Asiatic path,
Mine beloved, mine darling, mine seraphic helper.

iii.

I found wholeness, the other purpose to mine sustenance,
She's not for sale, she's not a slave, she's a cherub; not some anecdotal tale. She's not one to taketh man's bribery, she's not a peasant sold and payed for rent: tis she's heavensent- the answer to mine prayer's, she's delicate, she's an empress doth thou seeith, I was birthed for her, as she for me, both made for another, to cherish each other, on cloud nine we shalt be seen.



©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poets poetry
©Earl Jane Nagley dedication-Filipino rose

i cried myself to sleep again last night
those old demons resurfaced
and i knew they would follow me into my dreams
i dreamed that i was scared
i was broken
i was alone
the ghosts of my past were all around me and the tears just wouldn't stop
and they said it would happen again
because why wouldn't it?
i was too weak
i wasn't worthy enough to prevent it
they closed in on me and i couldn't breathe
and then
then everything slowed
and i saw your eyes
they smiled at me as you soothed my soul and wiped away my tears
you wrapped me in your arms and said it would be alright
that you would protect me
you promised
and for the first time in a long time
i believed
i woke up alone in my bed
but i felt your presence
like your arms were still around me
my pillow was dry
**the tears stopped