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Elizabethanne Sep 2021
I take my family photo albums
And pin those ghosts down to the walls
I keep running to my past trying my best to bring it back to life
always thinking “there’s a real life haunting.”
when I see myself any younger than 19
I take my family photo albums
And try to pin down your love
as if I’ll be able to see the warning signs
if it’s been written on the walls
I keep running back to my past like an old wives tale  
half told truths slipping through hands
and passing from mouth to mouth
Landing on my dinner plate filling it all the way up
I take my family photo albums
and wonder “why is it?”
I do not recognize who is staring back
I keep running back to my past
trying to find out everything about who I am

- I've been trying to find clues about who hid me away
Elizabethanne Sep 2021
My star,
Your white studded boots are to young to be walking this path
Street lamps highlighting
Copper glitter dusted on cheekbones
and butterflies pinned down to blonde curls
You look as if you know-
delicate like the back of your hand
As if you know how innocent can become like a practised thing
My darling,
This isn’t the way-
you want your name on the lips of people you’ve never met
Caught between teeth and never said in the daylight
To be stashed below mattresses
In-between web folders saved as something else
Only to be brought out when alone
My sun,
Being adored is only as gold as the girl and you lost your midis touch
Dawn breaks ago /Heartbreaks ago
Now theres nothing but an inexcusable ache
your trying to rid your self of by illuminating all those your with
My truth,
White picket fence you are not
But those boots are not made to walk this walk
You’ve found yourself on

- Baby its time to run run run
Elizabethanne Aug 2021
Check your bedsheets
What nightmares did you leave?
Shake em out
Gather them up and tie the edges around your throat
Let them pool on the ground behind you
Fasten yourself a cape-
and circle the room once, twice.
Peer out the door way
Sit at the very tip of the frame.
Throw out your voice
“Is anyone still there.”
Wait a beat maybe even two
Then check your heart, what’s left of it
And leave it behind.
Step into the hallway
You know the best thing about capes is they double as cloaks.
For little girls with bedsheets knotted around their throats.

- You make it to sunshine
Elizabethanne Aug 2021
I loved him
and was thorough washing out every dark hurt of his
Twisting him into stained glass
so he would burn colours when the sun hit him
I needed people to see his beauty just as I did
turning him into a place of worship I allowed him power-
with my utter reverence
Leaving when I was done
He burdened me by saying
"he yearned for someone who shinned just as bright"
My broken heart was beating with disbelief
after spending all my love trying to fix him
Leaving myself
full of broken down doors and water logged ceilings
I think I took it too far and I have nothing-
left to gain from holding onto you
Now creating my very own stained glass body
I'll paint in the lessons of this love
for the next person who comes in
I will not make you into something larger than legend
I will not lose myself to love you
was I reckless to love you so much you became art
Elizabethanne Aug 2021
I will ask you again about holy
How do you become?
I'll wait patiently for the tales of faith
You love so much
Hoping to find virtue just like you
I’ll argue with you about the devotion you have
( slow, sweet, and full like the beat of your heart)
Moon lit and radiant
How can I become haunted like you?
I’ve been on my knees before
(never for the right reasons)
I've talked at god more times then I can count
I have never felt anything other than the empty echo of silence after
I want to know what it feels like to have faith in something else
Of someone else
When those nights are dark, cold, and endless
I’ll ask you one last time
How do I become holy and haunted

- You tell me -They are the same thing.
Elizabethanne Aug 2021
Welcome to my house of sorrow and salt  
My entrance fee is every single thing  
you’ve got left in your bones
I want to love every single inch of you
When that’s not enough
I will drag my teeth across the years separating us
hoping to God I find a reason for you to stay

- I have nothing other than the taste of impossible on my tongue
Elizabethanne Aug 2021
This constant ache of being alone
Won’t leave me alone
I’m no better now
Than I ever was
at putting my head between my knees
and just breathing
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