and hear me this
you wake to me
you sleep to me
you die to me
i am grief
and from my throat tears
the unencumbered rattle of
despair.
i am grief
a great beast
with dripping teeth
and souls to keep.
i destroy the ground
beneath my claws
and the flesh between
my crushing jaw.
i am grief
the notches in your door frame
and the smell of him,
untamed.
hear me this,
you wake to me
you sleep to me
you die to me
you fight to me
and cry to me
i am grief,
i am you.

i am you.

His face
The sight brings a smile to yours
His eyes
You can stare into them forever
His lips
You wish you can kiss them
His hands
You wish you can intertwine them with yours
His mind
It intrigues you
His soul
You can love it for eternity
His heart
It doesn't belong to you

the moon sets in the sky
like a bird knows how to fly,
many people travel by
they never wonder why.

days go by and by
are you living on a lie?

when you speak do you think?
do you ever stop to blink?
have you ever felt the brink?

you have to come to terms
the reality flame must burn,
you cant live your life like this
if youre living like a fish...

trapped in endless water,
do you ever even bother
to look at yourself and say
there has to be a better way.

there has to be happier days,
a tree with perfect shade
an unflawed picture in its frame
life cannot be a waiting game.

You are not without flaws
and this makes me
like you even more.

I just want it to end.

The hopelessness, the fear,
the constant critic in my head:
I've lived with them all for too long.

All I've ever known is this war, this endless battle.
There's nothing wrong with wanting it to end.
To wish that it didn't is cruel.

But why can't the best solution be the simplest?
Why do I have to keep fighting?

At times it's deafening,
and I'm so exhausted.

Why can't I just lay down in no man's land
and let this battle fall silent around me?

Why can't that be the end?

Because... I'll never know what's possible.

my heart aches.
what could have been?
memories flood.
who would I be?
tears fall.
why did I go?

Years ago
We stayed up till
3 am talking,
And today
I don’t even know
How to say hi,