So, do it. Decide.
                Is this the life
                you want to live?
                Is this the person
                you want to love?
                Is this the best you can be?
                Can you be stronger?
                Kinder? More Compassionate?
                Decide
                Breathe in.
                Breathe out
                and decide.

Today I stopped to imagine

If hindsight were foresight,
love languages always matched,
and needs were always met

If we never hurt each other
or let each other down
and if distance, time or death couldn’t separate

If…
If only…

How rich and beautiful the tapestry of our connections would be

Do you miss him?
Yes
Do you love him?
With all my heart
Do want to be with him?
Sometimes
So you'll talk to him again?
No, never

I like to reminisce on the times that we never had
The long nights we would spend in each others arms
The delicate touch of your skin upon my lips
The promises I would make, but could never keep
Sand in our bed, from the beach we never visited
The song in my head, playing on the night we never had
To all of the things we never had,
To all of the things we could have been

We're afraid to live.
We're afraid to die.
We're afraid to try.
We're afraid of what happens if we don't try.
We're afraid to love.
We're afraid to commit.
We're afraid people think we're full of ****.
We're afraid of the truth.
We're afraid to lie.
We're afraid people will think we're weak if they see us cry.
We're afraid to feel.
We're afraid of fear.
But knowledge is power.
So now that you know what you fear,
what are you going to do about it right now? Right here?

When I’m gone, walk my dog on the beach in the early morning.  
Let him see me in the sunrise, feel me in the pulling tide, smell me in the salty winds.

like pelting hail
till I had bumps
raised as braille
and he danced all over them
using his finger as a pen

He hit me
like a flying dart
pierced the bullseye
I, his mark
on his first throw
had me from the go

He hit me
like a bombing blizzard
billowing white dust
blinding me with every gust
till I was swimming in the soup
and then he flew the coop

He hit me
like quicksand
putty in his hand
as I moved
he would expand
and held me tight
into his chambers
and let me sink
like we were strangers