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 Apr 2014 Rebecca Durrett
Amber K
I dreamed of a new grave,
that was now home to a boy
who tried to destroy me,
and caused so much pain.

It was not a normal graveyard,
instead it was near the woods.
There were strange graves surrounding him.
His headstone was so plain.

"You ready?"
Someone spoke to me.
But I didn't have the courage,
to complete what they asked of me.

So without hesitation,
the person approached the grave,
and with a lighter,
they burned and blackened the name.

For a second,
he didn't exist.
His body did not lie in this pit,
because he never existed.

But someone who knew him,
came to visit the grave.
They did not question why the name was gone,
they just nodded and spoke about irrelevant things.

No one would miss him.
No one would find his grave.
With the name burned,
he never even existed.

Till I got a phone call.
How is he still breathing?
He spoke kindly to me,
like he had never done wrong in his life.

I cursed at him,
and told him never to return.
Because he was supposed to be dead,
and his name was burned!

But still he haunted me.
Just in a different way.
That's when I realized,
revenge leaves a bitter taste.
This is about a dream I had last night. Like the poem says, I dreamed that an ex of mine had died, and I was pretty happy just because that meant I never had to deal with him again (he messed me up pretty badly, so I'm not surprised that I was happy in my dream), and in my dream I went to his see his grave with some of my friends. They had apparently convinced me that it would help me get over the past and that I could finally get some sort of revenge. Well while we were at the grave, my friend took out a lighter and told me I should burn the name and it would help me forget that he even existed. I told her I couldn't because it felt wrong, but she did it anyways. That's when one of his relatives showed up and was talking to me about how she understood he done a lot of bad things to me and he probably deserved what happened to him and his grave. Right after that talk, I got a phone call from him. He was telling me to help him with something and he sounded so different. His voice wasn't the same and he sounded genuinely sorry for all of the hurt he had caused so many people, but I couldn't tell him it was okay and I couldn't tell him how to fix it, because I knew that nothing could fix what he had done. He was dead and non-existent to most of the world, yet I still felt the same pain from the past as I did before his death. I think this dream helped me realize I need to stop letting what happened in the past effect me. Whether he says sorry for what he did, or changes his ways, or dies and becomes just another body in the ground, it won't change the past. The only thing I can do is forgive and move on with my life instead of remembering the things he did to me. It's the only way I can remain happy and free from the past.
They See A Different Me

I know it's just the outer shell
That other people see
Not knowing who I am inside
They see a different me

They think they know who I am
And how I will react
Only see what they want
Not gather all the facts

They will not ever question
Can't bare to know the truth
Think they have the answer
To why I act the way I do

They do not know how I feel
Not exactly where I stand
What it is that I believe
Or who I really am

I know it's just the outer shell
That other people see
Not knowing who I am inside
They see a different me


Carl Joseph Roberts
The clock in your room is stuck on 6:46 p.m. & I think that's all the time I need to fall in love with you.

It didn't take much time for me to realize that your laugh was sweeter than every bakery in northern california , & that your teeth are whiter than my favorite sweater, & the dresses you wear could rehabilitate a ******* addict in the matter of minutes, & your favorite song is the same song that we were listening to when we decided that we're better off together than apart, & that walk that you have when you're wearing your favorite outfit could cure my severe illness for good.
It didn't take much time for me to realize that 2+2 could only add up to equal you;
that everything in the long run always added up to equal you.

Time is a funny thing when all of it is spent with you,
with your humor,
your simple sarcasm,
your addictive tickles,
your favoring voice,
your stupidly stimulating conversations,
your cold yet inviting arms,
your masterpiece of a body,
your god-like heart,
& most importantly your vivacious patience with me.

Life is all about time, trial and error, & taking chances;
& frankly
you were the best chance I ever took,
the best broken clock I could have ever spent all of my time with,
& the best error I never made.
 Mar 2014 Rebecca Durrett
CG
I wish you could see how much better I am now,
Without your smell, your smile, your name flittering around in my mind.
I wish you could see how much happier I am now,
Without your constant nagging about where I am, or who I'm with.

I wish you could feel how much lighter I am now,
Without your body always wound around mine.
I wish you could feel how much colder I am now,
Without your every breath warming my neck.

I wish you could see how much I miss you.
3/27/2014
How do we really know
That we are good people?
How do we know
If God is smiling?
Is He really there?
Or are we just alone;
Out on our own?
Is it debatable or fact?
Or a debatable fact?
Or is this all just to give Him a good laugh?
How can anyone be so sure?
We are so imperfect
Who are we to be confident?
Are we really that self-important?
What if everything's backwards
And we're all hanging in the balance
Upside down, faces cherried
Cuffed by the toes
Left with no hope.

What if you're wrong?
I have many
many
fears

**but the future scares me *most
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