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as I lie down to sleep,
these silent memories,
like snails,
slowly crawl into my head,
every memory stuck on replay,
memories of our last kiss
in your small silver car,
the last kiss shared before we faded  away,
like dust we dispersed into air,
memories of that day still
haunt me,
your face
it wont go away,
those beautiful eyes,
the way your touch sent waves of explosions,
inside and outside of  me
you were the only one who could release that feeling in me,
because you knew me,
you once loved me,
such memories are too precious to eradicate,
to make them go away,
how I wish it would never hurt this much to go to bed,
sleeping in a world of old memories,
and shedding oblivious tears.
If this shall be the end, thinks it best to let you know I was crying and trying but it only feels like im dying maybe im flying, flying with the angels who once tried to take me. Maybe im free, this cant be heaven, because everyday im put through hell hoping there is a plan for me. A plan that the things that tear me down will no longer be a part of me. That i will no longer want to take my own life because i am scared of me, living isnt all what its meant to be, i cant tell you how many times i was close. I cant tell you how many times i tried because i just couldnt find a meaning to my life. Its like a battle and im never winning, Ive never wanted to leave so bad in my life.
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Who's the fairest of them all?
You're too fat
You're too tall
You're not the fairest of them all
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Who's the fairest of them all?
You're a geek
You're too dark
You're not the fairest of them all
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Why can't I be pretty like them all?
You're worthless
Not good enough
You can't be pretty like them all
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Why can't I be clean like them all?
You're a cutter
A stupid b*tch
You can't be clean like them all
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Is there a reason to stay at all?
You're family hates you
You have no friends
There is no reason to stay at all
Mirror Mirror on the wall
I'm a gonner watch me fall
You deserve it
You're life is gone
You're a gonner hope you fall
Mirror Mirror on the wall
Have you seen my girl at all?
I watched her crumble
I watched her fall
Your girl is gone
All because of the mirror on the wall
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i want to be alone
so please don't pick up the phone.

i love you but i just need time to breathe
trust me please.

i ask that you put your love on hold, only for a second or two
i promise you, my heart will always be yours to keep.


(a.d)
The Lord
has
U
in the palm of His mighty right hand.
The very hand that, with one small
flick of the finger could set
galaxies spinning
has caused u
to flutter over the soft
petals of flowers, and He cares
for each one. He set His light upon
your wings so that each tiny scale on
your wing.             is                Loveliness
I tried my best to shape this.
We'll see how it looks in a minute
dear the love of my life,

thank you for waltzing into my world
so quickly and so unexpectedly
i think we are nothing more
than the perfect stroke of destiny
we are meant to be
there is a reason we found each other
to cure one another from hopeless days
and finally live through our own cliches
you are my sun, my moon, and my stars
without you i am nothing
but a body full of scars
you cure me from self doubt
you fix me from self hate
make me realize i'm unconditionally loved
make me truly believe in fate
you are my mantra, my muse, my woman
i can't breathe without you
not with the absence of your love, i just couldn't
thank you for being mine
and thank you for giving yourself to me
no amount of time or words
could allow me to ever express that to you adequately
give me your forever
not a day less will do
i will love you until my last breath
and when my spirit thrives after my body has died
you, my soulmate, will always be by my side
i love you, lauren.
Blue is the sky
but also the ocean
kissing the shore,
for the very last time.

Blue is the snow
in all children's drawings,
blue is our skin
when we are in pain.

Blue is the empty
and blue is the farthest,
blue is the cold in our lives
and the pain.

Blue is the loneliness
always inside us,
it is the void
that makes us insane.

Blue is the biggest,
our most favorite color
it lives around us
as we call it air.
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