There are days that make me wanna burst out of happiness
Those little things that please my soul
When the sun gently wraps around me
When the moon comforts me
When the sky takes my breathe away
When the calming waters take away my stress
When the leaves and flowers fall and grow so I can start fresh
When snowflakes travel with me to feel safe
When the rain washes away the pain
And when I can genuinely feel happy
Once I feel the sincerity
It’s time when I want to cry out of joy
It’s been too long
The people who I surround myself
Those that make me happy
Those who motivate me
My days are not always filled with laughter
My time could be running out soon
I may be young, but I honestly don’t know how much I have left
When more than half of your whole body has been consumed by monsters and fears
I then feel that my love has begun to slowly run out because it’s given to the wrong people
Or that it’s not enough to wrap someone like a warm blanket
But there are days where I felt more than just a fragile being
Honestly I love those that give me such happiness and reassurance
The small kisses, hugs, laughter, and smiles
I love it all
I want to fully embrace it
Just like the life I’m given
Because just me living for many days that are filled with sorrow and few that are happy
It’s the simplicity with a little sprinkle of craziness, is what does it for me
A lovely memory
Is what makes it enough
But that’s just me

August 1, 2017

Hello...hello, is anyone out there?
I’m drowning from my tears
I’m trying my best to reach the elysian paradise
But it’s no use
I’m down deep in the waters
I’m almost reaching to the bottom, which is what I fear
Love is such poison to me
When I need it, Cupid’s bow hits someone else so I can suffer
Love is not kind to me
It leads me into a dark pit
Love makes me want to crave more
For them to show affection to me
To pay attention to me
To hold me
To reassure me
To tell me that all will be okay
Love comes in many ways
Yet it does not deliver to ones who have felt they no longer deserve it, no matter how much they need it
It’s too late
Is it?
Will the blind doves be able to see?
Will I have a chance?
Will there be a time when someone will lend me their hands…
And pull me out of despair?
Will I be able to experience the pure warmth from love?
Will that one day ever come?
Then I shall wait for that day when I can say what others say…
We came
We saw
We loved
But until then, I stay asleep in the deep sea
Waiting for the day, for I will be awaken…
When my borders are broken down due to the overwhelming amount of true care and love
When I break my chains off that hold me down
Is when I will become true to myself
And to you
So please be kind to me
For I am trapped

November 17, 2017

Red dry patches there
Red dry patches here
Red dry patches everywhere
Irritating, itchy , and ugly
“Put some lotion and everything will be fine. It will be gone and it won’t be fugly”
They said
If only it was that easy as a book I just read
But no.
I always keep myself on the low
You see, sometimes these patches bleed
And I cry, because it hurts and wish it will heal at such greater speed
I cry because when the water cleanses my body, it sometimes burns
I wish we could take turns
So you would understand
Why I can’t simply put myself with such confidence within myself, as I seem like a lost strand
Why my insecurities are high off the roof
How I want my body to disappear, like “****”
How I’ll never have decent skin until many months from now
From time to time admiring other people’s fair skin and I say “wow”
I wish I had normal skin
So I wouldn’t have to be dry and flaky, I would’ve had some sort of win
I wish I could be able to wear clothes that reveal some of my beauty from my body
But being snapped in reality, it’ll just disturb everybody
So I shall wait
And just deal with everything as it is my fate