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 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Katryna
Khat can we talk?
About what? Wait let me guess, about us? Me and her?
No, about us,
Us? I said I love you, then you logged out. So, I decided to delete it baka lang kasi mag log in ka ulit :) the next day you said you had an internet issue. What do think, I'll buy that? no your kidding me,
No hi and hello after that.
Why cant you be just as honest as I want you to be. Why everything seems so complicated. Tell it to me, why?

I checked your skype, you had 2 more account for what?

Is me being an overacting actress once more?
Or is it you who falling out of love once more?
This post surprises me a lot, I never knew it was posted in public and I'm glad that you like it. Anyway, this is not a poem (I'm sorry) this is just a product of my imagination. An imaginary conversation between me and my greatest love.

Today is my 48 hrs deadmachine peg. I wish I could share everything through my notes details by details, inch by inch, moment by moment. But I can't, I just need time and more courage for this, Giving up is not my type, but this time I guess, I need to and Fate begging me to do the right thing. For heaven sake.

He teaches me how to love a person and he told me that "Love is more about giving than receiving" That's the time I realize, how much I love him, that's why I let him go, I let him be with the person who can give him a life that is worth living for and be with the person who makes him proud, ung tipong taas noo, winner, trophy ganun. I know, everybody knows I'm not that kind of person, maybe I am, but too much, not really, he was the only person who believes in me with the things that I can and I cannot do.

He also teaches me how to settle, according to him, don't settle for less. I guess this is the reason why he didn't choose me. He never believes in forever, not as much I do but look, he's getting married. No hard feelings,I am so so so so happy seeing him on his wedding day but of course, I'm not invited. I can't wait for their pictures posted on social media at least, that will be the last time will see his eyes smile. Soon, God will redirect my life into more meaningful and worth living LIFE. Thank you for your time reading this short letter of mine as well as my imaginary conversation.
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Katryna
Pagtatagpuin muli tayo ng tadhana,
Kung kelan,

                                                 hindi natin alam,
Kung saan,


                                                 hindi natin sigurado,
Isa lang ang dasal ko,
Sana handa tayo.
somewhere down the road
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Katryna
Halik sa noo,
Halik sa kamay
Halik sa labi,

ngayon,
Halik na lang sa hangin
at sa mga natagong litrato
bilanot ng ala-ala.
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Katryna
Nakita ulit kita,
sa minsan natin tinambayan.

Unang beses kitang nakasama sa pansamantalang paglayo natin sa kanila.

Unang beses kung saan nakalayo tayo at nagpakasaya.

Pansamantalang naiwan ang puso
Habang tinatanaw papalayo.

Ng bigla kong makilala,
alaala na lang pala ang kumaway saakin mula sa malayo.
On the spot while on the road.
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Ash
Wash away my sins
Im the devil in the angels garden
unbound me from this guilt
I am creation of my own catastrophe
I will let my scars bleed dry
I will my screams suffocate the silence
I will embrace the my wild and burn for my truth.
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
Carl
Gusto ko gumawa ng tula
Tungkol sa pag-abot ko sa mga tala
Panulat ang talas ng iyong salita
Sa mala-papel kong panangga.

Ilang taludtod pa lamang
Kamay ko'y saaking luha nag-aabang
Hatid na sugat 'di na mabilang
Sa puso kong hindi mo binigyang galang.

Isip ko ay napunta na doon sa sulok
Pati ang puso kong mabagal na ang tibok
Hindi pa kasi tapos ang tula nating sasangga sa mga bundok
Kaagad mo nang tinadtad ng walang katapusang tuldok.
cmps
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
amy
BUT
 Oct 2020 Eindeinne Moon
amy
BUT
smiling but my skull is screaming
nodding but my soul is sobbing
free but my voice is captured
open but my eyes are glued

love you but you love to hurt me
hate you but you feed my loneliness
need to speak but petrified of nothing
lost for words but won’t shut up

financially stable but life is poor
walking alone but surrounded by demons
listening to you but deafened by pain
wonderfully happy but tremendously miserable
I'm ready for something real.
I'm tired of being the curtains that are pulled closed every-night.

I once gave a boy my glass heart, and he held it dear,
and then, he moved away. And I was packed inside a box,
it was labeled, 'fragile,' 'handle with care.'
It wasn't for months that I saw the sun,
and when I did, I couldn't tell the difference
between artificial, and sunlight.
Once again, he held me in his hands,
but they were rough and calloused;
the security was gone.

I was placed in a corner where I was rarely touched again,
and one night something terrible must've happened,
my smooth exterior seemed to have sharpened at the edges,
and he placed me in a bin, never to be seen again.

There's vases that hold flowers,
and there's vases that are placed in china cabinets;
I'm tired of being falsely decorated.
I'm tired of having to hold everything in,
and be expected to be the beautiful centerpiece
for everyone to glance at, and walk by.

I am beautiful, but I am not a centerpiece.
I am also a collection of flaws;
I'm translucent: all my emotions flood,
and I'm fragile; I tend to break at the slightest touch,
and I'm empty,
until someone fills me up.

But I want something real.
I don't want to hold plastic flowers,
that will never fade away.
I want to hold the beautiful rose
and at it's prime time,
though I will cry,

I can say it was real.
I can say he was mine.

(NJ2014) All Rights Reserved.
I was going off into a rant, and I ended up speaking this and it resulted in spoken poetry.
Gusto ko simulan ang tulang ito sa tanong na "kamusta kana?"
Kamusta na ang taong minahal ko ng sobra pa sa sobra
Naging malungkot kaba nung ako'y nawala?
O naging masaya dahil wala na ako sa tabi mo sinta

Nagbabaliktanaw ako sa mga ala-ala noon na ating binuo
Naging masaya naman tayo
Kaya di ko alam anong dahilan mo para mag bago
Para masaktan mo ako ng ganito
Para iparamdam mo sa'kin na hindi ako kawalan mo
Para ipamukha mo sa'kin na wala na talagang TAYO
At ngayon napaisip ako kaya ka pala nagbago kasi may bago na palang nagpapatibok ng puso mo

Di ko mapigilan hindi magalit
Di ko mapigilan na hidi masaktan
Di ko mapigilan na lumuha hanggat gabi patungong umaga
Di ko mapigilan na tanggapin na ako nalang yung naiwang tanga
Tanga na umaasa na magkabalikan pa tayong dalawa
Umaasa at nagmamakaawa "Pakiusap mahal, usap tayo. Ayusin natin to"
Pero sarili ko lang pala ang niloloko ko
Kasi nakikita na kitang palayo at hindi na maaabot
Nakikita na kitang naglalakad kasama siya habang puso ko'y kumikirot

Kaya sa huling pagkakataon
Binalikan ko ang dati nating tagpuan
Nagbabasakali na ikaw ay madatnan
Pero namulat ako sa realidad na may mga bagay palang di na pwede maging katotohanan
Kaya heto nagbaliktanaw nalang ako sa mga magandang ala-ala na akin paring hinahawakan
Kasabay ng pag-agos ng alon ay ang pag-agos ng luhang nagasasabing kailangan ko na 'tong bitawan

Kaya ngayon tatahak nalang ako ng ibang landas
Maglalakad ako, pilitin na ang mga nangyari sa'ting dalawa ay maya-maya ay kukupas
Maglalakad ako, habang wala ka na sa tabi ko, yung taong minahal ko ng wagas
Maglalakad ako, maglalakad ako
Pero  lilingon parin ako at makikita ko ang iyong mga bakas
Bakas na patunay na ikaw ay naging totoo
At hindi panaginip na nilikha ng imahinasyon ko
Na merong ikaw na pansamantalang minahal ako
Merong ikaw na minsan ay ginawa kong mundo
Merong ikaw na tinanggap ng buong-buo at
Merong ako na sinubukang lumaban pero sa huli meron paring ikaw na bumitaw nalang ng bigla-biglaan

Hanggang ngayon naglalakad parin ako dala-dala ang katangang "Pinagtagpo pero di tinadhana"
Yan nga siguro kasi ang kwento nating dalawa
Ang mga landas natin na wari'y nagkita,
Ngunit hindi inalaan para magkasama.
Maglalakad ako, hanggang sa malimutan na kita mahal ko
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