Batman, Superman, Iron Man to I cant  fly I can not turn blue?
Captain America, Wolverine, Flash, I cant shoot lazers from my eyes or be there in a dash.
X-men, Watchmen, Xavier too, im not from krypton or mutated from a Zoo.
Im not another hero I was rasied as a zero, through words I can inspire and now retire.

United with more than double helix,
Tangled lives and childhoods intertwine,
Rasied as sisters,
Best friends to be,
And as your tears clench on your heart,
My hands will reach to pull you up.

-Kathia Mariana Landeros

He could sing,
Songs did bring,
Stirring to my soul.

Played the two eight
track tapes, until late,
with headphones,
surrounded but alone.

He could lay out lyrics,
a bard, a poet, a musician
that rasied peoples spirits.
                                              Like "The Eagle and The Hawk"

That voice still echoes.

Played many instruments,
like they were extensions
of himself, fine implements.

Never I thought,
Would I see him,
                           sing
In a big concert hall.
               Or hoping, finding out that, "Country Roads Take Me Home"

I was right.

But was I ever part wrong.

That voice still echoes.

Summer in Prince George,
He was coming to town.
A concert series across the land,
not in an arena but
                    an outdoor bandstand!

There sat my hero, less than fifty feet away,
His fragile humanity, let the "Sunshine on My Shoulders",
Through times of my youth.

I don't remember the songs in order,
he did some favorites and some new,
he played his twelve string and the six,
that night was amazing so much so is sticks.

The resonating vibrato,
The notes pitch perfect,
The...times when I am down,
Then I listen to his music and it reminds me of my home, my youth, far away.

That night looking east, I could almost see the "Rocky Mountain(s) High"  

His life changed direction,
maybe some misdirection,
He was different,
Or maybe I became indifferent,
His passing was tragic,
But nothing...
will ever erase the magic of that night,

under the stars,

out in the open

to where the singer and songs carried far,

by that voice, his voice that still echoes.

I don't regret a lot of things in my life
I don't spend hours thinking about what could have been
I don't think about how we were rasied together
I don't imagine what our kids would look like
I don't dream about how much I love you
I don't cry seeing you with her
I don't curse the day I said yes and then got scared
I don't wish we were together
I don't say your last name after mine
I don't act like if I had just waited you would be mine
And
I don't always tell the truth

When did talking to the opposite *** jump straight to flirting or cheating.  If your in a relationship and your significant other wont let you even add a man or a woman on Facebook because they think you like them and are flirting and cheating on them, theyve got some issues... and on the reciprocal end of things if your single and you have a person in a relationship add you or talk to you... thats all they are gonna do until they start flirting... and you will know because you will start smiling more often talking to them then anyone else... just because you have technology now with Facebook at your fingertips dont freak out about the opposite ***. Some girls find it easier to be friends with boys then girls... mostly due to the attention they attract from them. For guys we are programmed to talk and look at woman, that being said we were rasied to be gentlemen and learned to just talk, and by that friendships happen. So calm the **** down nd learn to trust will ya?

I find it harder and harder to wake up  in the morning not because im lazy or I dont want to go to school. Its solely because im tired; tired of opening my eyes and realizing that Im still here  that i havent been granted my single wish from that one person we call "god". That i have to live through another day in the dark abyuss you call home. I never wanted this life, to be this *******- montser my own mother hides away in her closet, I long for the day i can be happy.  Where i can feel love for the first time. I dont belong here. You see the other day while you all slept, I stayed awake. Its nothing unusal on my part. I live in the dark, sad and alone. Its where ive always been, all ive ever known. That night, this darkness was deeper than before as i sat on my bed and cried my nightly tears I stared into the darkness, looking for my hands Until i rasied them and the tiny sliver of light from my window reflected off my old trusted friend. The cold rusted piece of metal felt right in my hands. It gave me this happiness ill never understand. I shine the glare on my upper leg the lines of dispointment and shame show- themselfs as i read through them; Oh the story they tell.  I know what they all mean I remember every scar and why they lay upon my skin, its a sad story they hold. This one right here the crooked small one Thats the one that started it all. Or this one The wide long dark one twords the end The day i found out i was nothing more than a usless bag of roting flesh to her, that i'll be alone forever.  Thats the one ill never forget Because even to this day I rememeber her sweet soft voice yell at me in the middle of the lunch line to leave her alone. As much as i dont want to remember, no amount of alcohol can fill in the gap she left open Each and every line i read gets me into this rage i cant control Wanting to blame everyone for my problems but i know i caused them myself. I squeze that thin sheet of happiness in my fist and i feel this pain race up my arm  When i let go, my palm is full of this beautiful liquid that remind me im still human. To you it might not seem like much  But to those who understand that unwriten languge you read in the blood "If only this was enough to end your pain, im sorry im insifishant" Its morning now These thoughts have held me back from being happy for once. What is there to do now? Nothing. I have to wait my turn again Oh well, im already used to the feeling of disapointment. I clean myself off in the bathroom right before i look into the mirror. Theres no way to decribe that feeling you get when you look in your eyes and see all the wrong youve ever done.  "Its late, they'll wake up soon" i tell myself  under my breath. I rush to my phone and open to the screen shot of the day i got a taste of what love is. I reread the single reply over and over in my mind before i hear the russle of blankets from the thing my mother decribes as her only son that lays a sleep less than a foot from my bed. "I...i love you"  I try to remember the sound her mouth made as she studered that phrase. " Its time "  I get up from my soon to be death bed and put on my mask before anyone sees The same mask i made myself several years ago. Theres cracks and chips, yes But thats what makes it so uniqe. People try peaking into see my hell. So I do what any scared human would do, push them away. So far they give up and walk away. Im at school, its lunch. I open the door leading into the stair well and i see her. My last hope  Right before she sees me, i count  1...2...3 I remove my mask and hide it  Im shaking shes the first to see whats under. All the years of lonelines will hopefully end today when i show her my heart. Sadly They didnt. They seemed to get lonelier now  "Ding, ding" I dont want to go home I see her car outside waiting for me I feel the vibration in my pocket , I know its her.  I walk slowly down those steps leading to the front.  As i open the door to the outside theres this hope that flutters in my heart the hope i get to see her one last time before i go.  My puples dilate and the sudden blindness fades away  Only to show nobody there. Im "home" now. Theres nothing i can do anymore I just wait here for my time to come.  Its bed time already and i open back to the picture "I...i love you" Thats all i need. The sounds began to fade into the dark  I see her.  No more than a arm away theres nothing around but us. I watch her lips move "I...i love you"  I hear her more vivid than ever tonight. My eyes slowly open Instintly tears rush down the side of my face landing onto the pillow. And so it begans again..

Self medication is the way to go.
It worked for my mother and it worked for her father.
It's in my genes to drink the pain away.
I give a toast to the ghost who has become my host.
To endeavor this cycle I suppose.
I speak to feel free.
No matter how depressioning it may be.
I drink to also feel free,
To be,
To see,
And to pass the time away.
I don't like the taste to say.
Harsh on my lips.
But it lights up my world.
In a drunk stupor sort of way.
I ramble.
Maybe to pass time.
Or be enlighten.
Who knows?
I just continue on.
Sorry grandmother.
I'm sorry that I didn't cry when you died.
But I was always the unwanted child from your baby son.
Red wine from a box you drank.
So do I.
Maybe we are more a like than I want to say.
If God is real,
You must be in hell.
I don't think God takes to kindly to your rude words to a preachers wife.
Or maybe he does and your a saint.
Who am I to judge?
I just sit back and sip in take in all the hateful words you said.
It's okay though.
Because of how you rasied my no good father I am able to glide by this earth not feeling hurt.
Tough skin situation sort to speak.
Just another drunk ramble.

Funny how the good/nice guy never gets the cake and always finishes last. Im bound to always be on the side lines. What the **** is the point in caring when all you care for is tainted, battered and ruined. ******* hopeless romantic os all I'll ever be. Mainly hopeless. For the fact that I have yet to find another. Whos true. Whos real. It's all a lie, everything. My generation was rasied on lies, built upon death, greed and failure. We'll never know peace. It's a wasted youth, I'm a wasted soul, alike many others. Still hopeful for the end, the last suffering, the final cut on the lifeline. Eternal darkness.........Finally.....Peace.