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The biggest sacrfice one can give is to let a love one go.
To be able to say goodbye to that person you destroy by your presence.
Leaving you up in the middle of the night whispering their name.
Knowing that they will never come.
Living with a shattered self to protect them.
Protecting them against you.
Cause your bad news.
It's been this way since birth.
It's not a bad habit of destruction you carry.
No, it's who you are.
You want to embrace it.
Yet, you can't.
You lost the one person who did see that one sliver of good in you.
It gave you purpose being with them.
Now you have to turn back to the world before you knew them.
Yet, it is different.
They forever impacted you.
Without the warmth they poured on to you, you grow cold in the dark. Waithing for a new light.
A loving mother weeps.
A child grows cold in a hole.
The world lost more than one soul.
There's a saying it goes like this, "we're here to fill people's void, yet we never can completely fill it.
No one can fill your void. So we're stuck in this cycle unable to find peace.
We'll search and we won't be able to find the stuffing to fill that emptiness. So why do we do this? It's because we have hope. We need hope because that's all we have to find happiness.
The people who figure this out are the ones who are depressed, they may be slightly suicidal.
But on the off chance that you do find the stuffing to fill your void life is magical.
And that's why we need to continue to struggle.
To move forward and find our stuffing.
To be that rare diamond in the dirt.
The fictitious smile
The cheerful laughter
The pleasant greetings.
Are all deceived you see.
My calm quiteness, hides all that I compose from my woes.
How are you doing today?
I ask not that I really care.
Ploting against on the inside.
I act nice as someone who you think is nice.
I didn't even try to say that nicely.
My mask must be slipping.
Or cracking.
I may not be able to keep this facade up for much longer.
I am the devil in white.
Or so I was once told.
By a wise man up north.
"You are the devil, real as can be.
Cheer up honey, it's sunny show them teeth.
Be nice as you can be, so no-one can see. Be all you can be by this if not...
Just flee."
Who knew I would fall in love with the first devil?
His words still echo into my ears.
Or maybe it's just the voices I hear?
Please God if you can hear me shoot me.
I'm just kidding.
I am just a loon.
Trapped in a cocoon.
Trying to hide my disturbing personality.
My words are broken
Just like the writer who wrote them.
If love is a choice...
Then I must be making bad choices with you.
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