I'm am  very contradictory

I Am a beautiful disaster
I am gasless smoke
I am an ice fire
I am lovingly hateful
I am aggressively playful

I am kknowledgeable confusion.
..it's best at its worst

We were legends
Mythic anti-heroes and sunbathing statues
To be handed down through the fervent fires of forever
Untouchable by the languishing winds of time
Smiling at our own mortality with ****** knuckles and ****-eating grins

We were at once privy to all things and blank like hungry canvases, ready to absorb radiant smears.
They often laughed and asked how we made it this far allowing our uncorrupted appetites to persevere.
We winked back as we took another sip and listened to the music they couldn’t hear.

Such beautifully melancholic catharsis.

We openly dined on our borrowed time

We offered back no apology for our burning hearts.
We rode down the bridge on the backs of exploding horses looking to see what was over the next horizon
With inexhaustible decadence and the confidence of lightening we strolled down the sidewalks without avoiding the cracks,
In fact we hoped with thinly veiled secrecy that one would swallow us whole and reveal to us why the clouds are never satisfied enough to stay in one place

We danced our way through the unremarkable
Side-stepping the gasless motors and cynical flowers refusing to grow on the side of the road
With full glasses and brilliant bursts of light that couldn’t be held behind the cage of a bulb, we descended into the careless waves and let them stain our souls like fire onto coals

It was always the beginning of the day.
The night was always young.
Our souls were always wide awake.
The clocks simply couldn’t keep up.

And at the final beginning’s end, we refused to shake hands
Taking whatever breath we had left to fill our lungs with one last smoldering theft
We greeted death as an old friend whose invitation had been lost in the mail
And left this world the same way we came into it; on fire.

On fire.

We were you. We were them.  We were all the parts of this adventure that slipped through their hearts.
At least we left them our ashes so they find their own new starts.

Tell me to leave.
Make me leave you.
I’m too selfish to relinquish solace and go myself,
and too weak to watch you walk away from me.
Our light has turned into a shadow,
grown dark and heavy
It has cast itself over our heads,
slowly resting more and more of its weight
on our shoulders
Too many nights
the moon and stars have become witnesses to
the dimming of your brilliant glow, and the flickering
of my dying spark
Night after night,
helplessly watching us make our
desperate attempts
to rid ourselves of the burdens we’ve been
carrying on our backs.
I know you don’t want to
but, baby, our light is
fading fast
And it needs to breathe,
but we’re both too busy
holding our breath to even think about
coming up for air
So, baby, unless we do something
quick,
we’re gonna burn out.
So tell me to leave.
Because I won’t do it
unless you ask me to
And I could never tell
you to go
But if we stay any longer,
our troubles will become
a load far
too heavy for our cold bones to bear
we’ll shrivel in the frigid
air
Tell me to leave.
We’re all out of
quick fixes,
and neither of us have the right
tools needed for
a full repair.
Don’t, and we’ll start to ignore
our problems
like they are broken pieces
of furniture
Until we are lying
to ourselves, pretending that
we still work
and hoping our guests
don’t notice.
Our fire which once
burned
so bright and fervently
will have become as useless
as a gasless heater
I know you don’t want to
but, baby, you’re stronger than me
The fire is out
It’s dark
and we don’t have
any flashlights, because we never
needed them to help us see
Until now
So tell me to leave you.
Please, tell me.
Because we love each other
too much
for our own good
Make me leave you.
Our light has burned out,
and we’re choking on the smoke