I stand tall on a pillar of bones
And I look towards the sky
As magnificent wings tear open my back
Emerging from my spine
The splendour of these white feathers
That I have been gifted for my efforts
I will cherish them greatly
For they are my new pride and joy

I spread my wings and look down
These bones I stand proudly on
The lives I've sacrificed for my lord
I did everything I had to for this gift
I have slaughtered my enemies
I have slaughtered my friends
I have even slaughtered my family
All for the glory of my lord

I have assembled this tower of bones
So I can become closer to my lord
So I can bask in his grace
So I too can become a god
To swim through the skies
And be free of the horrors of down below
No sacrifice was too great for this moment
I have finally broken free

I throw my body off of my pillar
With my wings spread, I glide
I soar through the skies with pride
I flap my wings and begin to ascend
But I notice that my wings start to feel heavy
They start to grow stiff
My wings are turning to stone...
My wings are turning to stone!

Please, my lord, why is this happening!?
I did everything for you!
I gave you my entire life!
Please, please, please, let me fly!
I don't want to fall!
I don't want to fall!
I don't want to fall!
I don't want to...

Regardless of my begging
I plummet towards the ground
Engulfed in a ball of flames
I am an angel of stone
Sent down to the ground so soft
My impact will bring holy fire
I am the divine intervention
To bring an end to those who walk the same path I did.

I used to have a puppy,
I rang a bell once before I fed him, every day,
I knew he loved me even if he bit me every night,
Until I couldn't raise him any longer.
The puppy grew larger and larger and ate more.
More.
I rang the bell two times.
More. More.
Three times.
More. More. More.
I never rang the bell again.
I lost everything and couldn't afford any more food.
Then one night I abandoned him.

Years later he came back home.
A bony old stray dog.
He looked at me with puppy eyes and I,
I couldn't resist and fed him once more.
Just one time before sending him out into the cold again.
I held out my hand and he bit off my fingers.
A starving animal will always feed.
And I had nothing.
He ate parts of me.

I didn't let him leave.
I cut the dog apart.
And ate him.


I felt alive.

The moment I saw your face I knew
Nothing could ever satisfy my lust for you
And fate shall be my guardian angel to never leave your side
I knew that every part of me would crave your skin to touch just mine
And every inner part of me jealous of those very parts

I want to lick, to taste your skin
Want everything between my lips
I want to feel all of your skin
With more than just my fingertips

And I know that inside of you will never even please desires
I built up over all this time
And I know that each part of you on me will never meet my greed
To have it all just for myself

I want to cut your skin apart and find a shelter in your hull
I want to be close to your soul
And not just things that carry flesh

I want to have you in my blood
To flow within in my cramping veins
I need to have you in my blood
And feel you pump inside my heart

I need you to be one with me
Not ***, not bride, but one dead hull
That shelters both our souls within

That's all I'll ever ask of you
To stay with me forevermore.

We speak carefully
without naming body parts.  
As if the utterance of a word
could evoke touch – which would mean
hearts racing off in jolty cadences, sweat and
altogether too much skin.

We move with hyperawareness of our limbs.
The air ripples and reaches with each gesture
in phantoms of feeling.
I sense the edges of your fingers,
I cannot ignore the millimeters of
space between our knees.

Your mouth curves down at the edges,
when your gummy smile splits
at the things I say. I remember your lips.
I cannot put them away
in a part of me that locks.
Your mouth opening against mine –

your tongue slipping in.
Put it away.
Your mouth on the pulse below my chin.
Turning back in your doorway,
the dawn light white on your skin.
Put it away.

This wanting is something I can keep
like a mantra - a bed with you
won’t again be a bed for me.
Now we drink as strangers or friends
who once pressed their bodies against each other’s –
but heavy snow covers only blur the edges,

nothing disappears entirely.
We speak carefully

to hide the pump of blood and memory.

Grab a feather
                                            Open your soul.

Grab some paper
                                         Make it your own.

And a small feather
                                             Shall be a brush,

And a small paper
                                        Your poems' canvas.

As I glare into the sky,
Thousand lights shine down on me,
Thousand eyes to pierce my veil,
Thousand minds to know my tale.

I crave your eyes to look at me,
The eyes you placed on sun and moon,
To fear my deeds, to fear my hunt,
To **** all children you have shunned.

I want you, God, to watch me close,
Through wafts of mist, through wafts of blood,
To memorize the blade that cut
Through skins and organs of your loves.

Before you come, before you close
in on me the one who cursed
all of your sheep
all of their hope
i want to see your face once more
the mask you wear in minds of priests
shatter the lies show me the beast
you truly are.

i want you to KNEEL
come show me god the FEAR you feel
come show the god that LIED to us
the one who neglects war and LUST

WHERE ARE YOU TODAY
COME HERE AND PLAY

             with
                      ME

and TRY TO STOP ME
stop me!
or i will end this child that prays
to. a. false. god. WHO ONLY SWAYS
BUT DOES NOTHING BUT WATCH ME WAIL
IN PAIN AS I BREAK DOWN AND FAIL
i'll carve my name into his back
and shove the blade into his head
he'll scream and call me monster
till. he. bleeds. out.
but i know
the only monster is

      Y
                 O
                             U



die