I am broken and tattered                                                         ­                  Is  it  that too plain to see?                                                             Tell  me  that  it  doesn't matter                                                           ­ that you can still love me                                                               ­                 Hold my hand and tell me                                                               ­             that  you won't go away                                                             ­                    Persuade and convince me                                                               ­                    that you plan to stay                                                             ­                      Let  me lay up against you                                                              ­                       I need to feel that I'm safe                                                             ­          I'm  doing all I can do                                                               ­       to  ease  the  emotional weight                                                           ­  Pull  me  into  strong arms                                                             ­        protect  me from myself                                                           ­  Save  me  from  self-harm                                      ­                            I  put  myself through hell                                                             ­     Be  my  personal life line                                                             ­                Throw me a strong rope                                                             ­          Be  there  at the right times                                                            ­               before  I lose all hope

I have never meant anything to you                                                              ­You kept me around for something to do                                                        I've  said  it  before,  but  I am through                                                          It's  time  that  I  move  on  to  something new                                                              ­                                        I  gave  of  myself  one hundred percent                                                          ­   until  I broke while you never bent                                                        Thinking that you were too good for me                                                as  you chiseled away at my self-esteem                                                      ­ I  only stayed because I thought it was true                                                       that I couldn't do any better than you                                                        but  if you really are the best that I'll do                                                             that  says  more about me than about you                                                              ­                                              That  I  would sell myself short so that I                                         could  just have  someone  be by my side                                                             ­                               I'd  rather  be  alone and spend time on me                                                               ­                                                this  very  person  that  has  been hiding                                                           ­                                Sometimes  people  are  like  steppingstones                                                  ­   and  I was  meant  to follow that road                                                             ­   to take me from where I used to be                                                               ­      to undiscovered territories

I don't know this stranger looking back at me                                                               ­                                                   I   don't  remember  changes  really   happening                                                        ­                         My  face  no  longer resembles me                                                               ­  I  put  my  hands  on  my temples, cradling                                         Who  is  this person before me, I say out loud                                                             ­            Someone  who  once  held  her  head up proud                                                            ­                              Now  I  am  just  another  person in decline                                                          ­                                 Whose  eyes  have  faded and no longer shine                                                            ­                             They  used  to  be  such a beautiful blue                                                             ­                        Now  they  are  dull  with a slight yellow hue                                                              ­                                 Lines  and  wrinkles are covering my pale skin                                                                                                             reflecting the same way I feel within                                                           ­   Where did my life go, what have I done?                                                            ­                           Have  I  ever  meant anything to anyone?                                                          ­                                   All  of  these  realizations scream out of me                                                               ­                                      while  the  person  in the mirror stares back lifelessly

I broke myself trying to hold you together                                                         ­                        withstood  the  waves of your stormy weather                                                          ­                         apologized  when  you  were the aggressor                                                        ­                                       always  the  victim  of  your constant displeasure                                             Had your foot on my back, and you kept me down                                                             ­                                               always  tethered to you, forever bound                                                            ­ But  if  the  truth  be told, it's you who needed me                                                               ­                                             I  am  the  strong  one  and  you  who  are weak                                                             ­                                                                If I would walk away from you this very day                                                 your ego would crumble and you'd slip away                                                 all of that aggression would fall into submission                                     wouldn't that be an interesting juxtaposition

God, I've been blessed in so many ways                                                             ­                                                   I  can  look forward to it every day                                                              ­ I  can't thank you for it face to face                                                             but  I will when I reach that heavenly place                                              All  my life, you've been there                                                            ­  when  I  thought  that nobody cared                                                            ­  A special   bond  we've   always  shared                                     all  of  my  burdens, I've been spared                                                           ­    So for now, I'll thank you here                                                             ­       in  my  heart , you are always near                                                          when  I  die,  I  will   not  fear                                                      ­    for  all  of  my  sins  have  been  cleared                  ­                                   I  had been lost but on the way                                                                        You showed me the path to heavens gate                                                  I  know that my future is bright                                                           because  I'll walk your eternal light

I want to go where the  tall grass is green                                                            ­                                      a  place  where  blue fish live in the streams                                                          ­                         Where  waterfalls  flow with  honey from bees                                     Giant  trees are covered with silver leaves                                                   I  yearn  to live where  the animals lie                                                              ­  A place of peace where I'll feel alive                                                            ­  Somewhere the birds fly all around me                                                         Where  they sleep so safe and so soundly                                           Where  you see a star and you make a wish                                         I   know  in my heart this home exists                                                           ­    A  place where the lavender sky is clear                                                   where  its beauty is beyond compare                                                          ­    A  spot untouched by any mortal man                                                         Acres  and  acres  of  God's  holy  land                                ­                                 I   am  positive this is where heaven lies                                                 I  hope to go there when I die                                                            A  beautiful  land  that God himself created                                      and  once I arrive my soul be fully sated

It wasn't until after she had died                                                             ­That they opened up their eyes                                                                   it was then that they realized                                                         ­         who  she really was inside                                                           ­    While  going through her things                                                           ­         old letters and diamond rings                                                            ­ she was  no longer  a  mystery                                               ­           she  became their history                                                          ­                        She had had so much to say                                                              ­        if  given the time of day                                                              ­                         They really had no clue                                                             ­                          of who they thought they knew                                                     She  had a  different life                                                             ­                            other than grandmother and wife                                                             ­        She  had hopes and she had dreams                                                           ­           so much was unforeseen                                                       ­        Pictures they had never seen                                                             ­                 of  all  the  places  she  had  been                                ­                                           Stories  they  would never hear                                                             ­           or  what she had done there                                                            ­            Letters written during the war                                                              ­         from boyfriends she had before                                                           ­      Scrapbooks of her past                                                             ­                       a  lifetime  gone by  too fast                                                             ­            With  tears and memories                                                         ­             They  knew that she would be                                                               ­    cherished  in every way                                                              ­            and  in their hearts she would stay