Tell me where is the path
To that which I once had
To that deep rich boundless love
That I, the reader, can only dream of...

Tell me, where lies my heart
Damaged, splintered in shards.
As his, pierced by the arrow of death
Which in turn took captive his last breath

Tell me, where has he gone
When the night sheds to dawn
When his light, his aura fades
Into a darkness, a tunnel of grey

Tell me, when will I breathe again
Without a pain that can paralyze
Without the river
drowning my heart
from all those tears that I've cried.
Please stop them from tearing me apart because
I've promised to keep them all inside.
Until that one morning, when I awaken
and know that each step taken
will be for you, my friend.
Because you showed me so much, even up to the end..
...amp

Get outta here, she said
before your heart bankrupts your soul and camouflages your feelings and
your character as a whole.
...amp

Embarking on moving old boxes,
as they've sat, awaiting my touch
Dust flies, layers of memories cry
memorabilia line with dirt and must.
Friends on cellophane-filtered pictures
enhanced by the mood of that time
as we swore an oath of allegiance
to a friendship that would never die.
...amp...

Look into my eyes,
what do you see?
Is it a baffled soul
masquerading
as me?

What will I find beyond this gate?
Once opened, can I catch enough love to seal my fate?
Could the water fill up my empty heart
and lead me straight to the part
where I say
I've found
home
                                   -amp

What makes you happy?
A very loaded question, indeed.
I think feeling loved and
being free
and knowing should my heart withdraw
you will still be there
for me.
...amp...

You feel scared, raw and naked
have faith for someone will drape you
in rich brilliant threads of oceans' blue weaved for a lost soul just like you!
...amp...

Don't come too close
Don't lean in
For we might kiss
and the Ride will begin
I'm scared of heights
Prefer being grounded
For I'll lose my grip
Get hurt and wounded
Then you'll stop the Ride
Abruptly, I'm certain
I'll walk away alone
Because I love you too much
to be a burden
...amp...

Recovered, head down,
knees clenched
Legs still won't walk her home.
Skin wet and heart drenched
listen to words and candid tone
and accepts her returning reverie
with a sip of the bottle of bravery
Yes, it was an awkward time
- amp

I traffic too much in feelings
I peddle love to fill my doubts
Bags of passion sold to zealots
in crowded bars and pubs.
And then one night you appeared
a smile, a flash of an instant flirt
A pull so magnetic and alluring
I had to follow, to convert...

Twenty five years later, here we are...
and I still remember that night in
that very crowded bar...
...amp...

His church was a pub
its regulars, his disciples.
A community of patrons
some staunchly miserable
others unorthodoxly insightful.

At night, the needy took his beer
And the connoisseurs, his wine...
but his behaviour was instinctive
and his wordless signals, kind
and for a while I called him, mine
...amp...

They lay, silent on the ground
awaiting your footsteps
to kick them around.
Those autumn leaves,
their rich colours abound.
...amp...

Now is not a favourable day
To put thoughts on paper
My mind, like a drawer in disarray
where notes are jumbled together
But when the sun greets the morning
with a  promise of things untold
my words will  burst, exploding
And shatter , my self, exposed
...amp...

I hide the secrets you don't disclose
Play pretend so no one knows
'cause the truths would leave you bare
too revealing for you to share
Believe me, I understand
'cause I've been playing that same hand
and I never really seem to win
I just play the cards I'm given.
..........amp

Pulse quickens, your palms sweat
city lights mesmerize you
lead you to the path of regrets
where broken hearts welcome you
Love-junkies looking for their fix
Hoping you'll be the one
who'll carry the potion to their lips.
...amp...

I feel torn, down the middle like,
one half lives here in solitude,
the other is driving on the turnpike
heading home to those who
know me the best
as I indulge in their
camaraderie
while awaiting a little
welcomed rest.
...amp...

January 30th...

Drinking coffee with Bailey's
Anything to numb the pain
My heart sinks, crippled and heavy
Outside, it's dismal, rain
I sleep an hour or two
wake up thinking I see you
But you're missing...
I shuffle around the corners
of our house
You're everywhere, your coat,
your socks, your coffee mug
We've closed the door to our bedroom
I hope you don't mind
I promise we'll reopen it again,
in time
I don't know if you can see us
But I wear your golden chain
and D. wears your silver ring
I'll give your brothers
something of you
I just hope I choose the
right thing.

I love you so much,
rest my darling
Till we meet again
on the other side
...amp..

Last night, I watched you
in the shadows, your ******
Befuddled by your beauty
I remain your unequivocal
admirer
...amp...

I was once so very important to you
Now, I keep asking myself what did I do
to have you search and find a newer one
and leave me, alone, completely undone
...amp...

The eyes are the mirror to
the soul
Mine, closed, so you'll
never know
That I am in want of
one thing
that you can't possibly
bring
To render me once again,
whole
...amp...

Age-defying remedies fill up
every nook of her shelves
playing Russian-Roulette
with her vanity
and her excessive admiration
of herself...
And now as she remembers clearly,  transfixed in the mirror of time
She realizes she is still a model
of a very old paradigm.
...amp...

My heart needs some sorting
to relieve it of its clutter.
I'm afraid once sanitized
it may lose its vibrant colour
...amp

If you travel outside of your boundaries
there is magnificent place called World
Some corners are show-offs
While others are quite preserved
with its obscure beauty
making lasting memories
.....amp

What would happen if I walked in?
Would you welcome me the way I've been,
throughout the times, a fickle believer
full of  suspicions but still I linger
awaiting, full of hope...
....amp

Heart wrapped in a dazzling bow
Its colour sparkles and glimmers
while glitter escapes from many tows
Even torn, it still shimmers.
...amp...

"What's renewable energy?"
LOVE, my dear...
-amp-

As dark as it sometimes seems
a picture of you comes in vivid dreams
Your beautiful hand touches my cheek making my toughness weak
and as I turn on my side,
I will myself to stay asleep.
...amp

My bed is empty, the sheets messy,
my pillows need some talking
for my thoughts are frazzled
and quite frankly, a tad baffled
at the eagerness in which you
left me this morning.
...amp

A little dot or comma here,
a stroke of pen often there
a dainty rhyme starts to appear
suddenly, out of nowhere
- amp-

I lick up the savory taste of my tears,
in their vigil,they camouflage my fears
and for awhile they leave me numb
until I fall asleep, hurt and undone.
And in the early morn, I shake off their residue and slowly
start to begin anew.
...amp...

"Can I really trust you?"
" You'll figure it out"
"Yes, but dissecting you
leaves me raw
and feeling distraught".
...amp..

Life moves you along, its destination unknown
In melodies of songs, draped in liquid tone
Some harsh, some soft, some mere whispers
To taunt you to doodle, create your own figure
Which will make you unique, one of a kind
In a world, thirsty for leaders, and
masterminds

.....amp