Every sip I take
Every bad choice I make
Nothing makes me forget
That every single time
..
I break

there are many things
i do not know
even after
40 years and i tell you
i haven’t stopped
this searching
since first i awoke
to the world
always so concerned
so amused
so incredibly internal
to a degree i cannot
describe or fathom
i only wanted
to love
and to help
and to create
and instead
the earth opened
and i fell
to another
place.

For every time I was hurt,
there rolled a tear over my face
that flew  into a poem

Poems of sadness and anger
Malaise and blankness
were attempts at filling

Now that a smile is the only
occurrence on my face,
There is nothing left to write about

And I am deeply glad about that.
I am where I need to be
I am where I'm loved

In the shadows I saw your face
For you would hide away from daylight
To afraid of what the world would say
When they see that you outshine them

sitting in the dark but not feeling alone.
just trying to hide from the crazy the world has shown.