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I'm coming home soon
I promise you.

I almost there.
I am almost bare.

Cracking back open
Every part of myself.

Taking my love back down
From the shelf.

I miss you and I need you.
I'm coming home soon.

Cause I miss writing my soul to you.
A letter to myself. To missing writing. To coming home again. To clearing those blockages.
She's shaking.
Unstable.
For the taking.
Swallowed in fog.
Connection is lost.
She's cut off
From herself.
She's cut off.
Can't get out.
There is no where but here.

"Disappear. Disappear."
She whispers.

"I am here. I am here."
She answers.

"Tell me." He says,
"Tell me all that you dread."

And her fears spoke louder
Than anything ever said.
Inspired from learning about polyvagal theory and the feeling of being "stuck" in the sympathetic state (fight/flight/freeze) or dorsal (collapse). Speaking about where youre at can help you bring back ventral state to the foreground, the beneficial state, the ability to have connectedness at ease.
It is often said that the light shines through the cracks to illuminate the darkness. While this is true and is the first step in identifying the darkness in oneself, that is all it does - simply lifts the veil. To transform, you cannot just bring the light to the darkness.

You must drag the darkness into light.
One of those thoughts.
 Jan 2018 Tyler Man
Lexi
A single tear slides down your cheek.
Every morning at 3am the girl decides it's time to rid herself of her pain.
Your stomach is tightening. She would take a shower or rather sit down in the water and cry for an hour. Your throat is closing
Cry for the heartbreak, the hope and chances she gives because in the end no matter how many times she avoids the word she's always going to be just a FRIEND. Your light headed and shivering,
the water is cold. Your numb not just from the water, oh dear; your emotions went down the drain with your tears. You turn the water off. Sit in your towel before climbing into bed and falling asleep with nothing inside your usually chaotic head.
 Apr 2014 Tyler Man
Kitty Lam
Change
 Apr 2014 Tyler Man
Kitty Lam
My whole life, I’ve wasted,
Or at least 45 years of my life,
I’ve wasted.
I suppose that I deserve a life
That is now not what
I’d expected.
My child, for I’d come from a
Wealthy family.
I used to have everything,
But now it’s different
I didn’t respect for what I have,
Instead I wasted it.
I dropped off school at the age of 12,
Just for Party.
Until, the future is all dark,
And that’s when I realized
That I have nothing left.
My friends,
Or I should say:
“My money friends”
Left me and even said
That I’m not good enough,
I’m not worth to be their friends.
Now, I only have you left as
My company.
You showed me new things,
The universe and life.
Then I remembered one time you asked me
A question, but I can’t answer
Ashamed of what a foolish parent
Am I.
My dear, I’d decided to change.
To be a better person in society,
To be a better father
For you.
I will make my own money,
Not by the base of my wealthy family,
But with my own hand
And the inspiration by you.
i'd taken my inspiration to a different point of view.
 Apr 2014 Tyler Man
Kareena
Box
 Apr 2014 Tyler Man
Kareena
Box
I tried so very hard
To turn you into that thing
You said you would turn me into

I turned you into a box
That sits high up in my closet
With only the most valuable things in it
To remember

There are corsages and letters
And that ****** bracelet I can't look at
There are smiley faces
And cards
And quotes all around the sides
To keep me from looking at it
Because it knew I would linger
And go back

Sometimes that box falls off my shelf
Straight into my arms
And I collapse onto the floor
Looking at what was
Contemplating if everything was
Just some lie
A beautiful lie
 Apr 2014 Tyler Man
Kitty Lam
For once I realized,
That I’m not worth it,
That I don’t belong
To a world full of hatred
And pain.

My passion is now gone,
And I’d lost my hope
I have nothing:
No friends,
No love, Nothing.

I see now that:
I’ve been wasting my time
Asking questions,
That will never be answered.
Yes, I’ve wasted my valuable time.

The wound in my heart,
Will never be fixed
For it is too late,
To even try
To even breathe

Wouldn’t it be nice?
To let go of every anger
And fear?
And just leave everything behind?
Literally everything?

I don’t see how I can continue
The path of my life.
All my memories,
Will be gone
It will be fine then.

Who else will help me here?
So I guess, this is a
Good Bye.
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