Without you life is a lot tougher
But you are still the reason I suffer
I got too attached and I cared to much
Now that's got me dreaming of your touch

So I don't get attached, it'll only hurt
Even looking in her eyes makes me want to flirt
Attachment is the cause of all my pain
and I'll never ever ever live through that again

But I know full well, that I'll fall again
and find I girl I think's worth the pain.

Now no, my friend, your life's not fair
but there's no point sitting with a vacant stare
life doesn't get better, but at least it goes on
good times aren't coming but the worst times are gone.
so do not sit alone, with that vacant stare
I don't know your happiness, but I know it's not there

Here I beg, for death's sweet release,
so I can finally be at peace,
and no one cares, and no one knows,
about unimportant feelings such as those,
of suicide, and of the end,
and a wasted life, I couldn't spend

I remember the way I used to smile
I haven't done that in quite a while
I remember the way happiness felt
Before I had to deal with the hand I'd been dealt
I remember what it was like to blush
Ah those were the days, it was such a rush
I remember how happy I once used to be
I remember the days back when you loved me

I once used words to build a girl wings,
Made her an angel who flew on false strings,
I wrote her endless passages of heartfelt emotion,
as I sat and stared out at the endless blue ocean.

But now I feel to much, to find the prose,
to compare your beauty, to that of a rose,
for it's incomparable, to all else I see,
but know that you, are beauty to me.

So though I don't write like I once did of her,
know that it's you, that I prefer.
For the right words don't exist, to say I love you,
but I assure you that, I truly do

Now I know that I had a life before,
but exactly how, I am not sure.

Exactly how were my hours spent?
Because if I'm not thinking of you, I'm not content.

Exactly what did I do with my life?
What did I have, to keep me from strife?

Actually now I'm not so sure...
Did I really have a life before?

Blank grey walls and an empty heart
I am awake and waiting for the pain to start.
Blank grey sheets and an empty bed
I can't silence the voices inside my head.
Blank grey floors but I'm already gone
I feel emotionless, empty and I am withdrawn
Blank grey eyes, and a ****** knife
Is this seriously all I'm doing with my life?

Blood-drops splatter, on the cold wood floor
as I rest my head, against the door
A painful distraction, from the hurt in my head
and another reminder, of all the times I have bled

Oh how I wish, that's what I could do
But I can't because it, would only hurt you

Bloodied knuckles, bleeding fist
at least that something I haven't missed.
I don't know what I did but I sure messed it up
as out of my hand I pull shards of cup
I just shouldn't have said anything
I should've know wasn't worth the trouble it'd bring
Why are you ****** of off? What have I done wrong?
It's times like this I realize, that life is too long.
Perhaps it'd be best, if I just said goodbye
I'm no use while living, so I might as well die.

Each breath you take, takes mine away,
As you sleep off, the woes of day.
Not a worry shows on your perfect face
The mere sight of which quickens my heart's pace
Peacefulness only shows your beauty more
The most beautiful girl, I ever saw
Looking so perfect, fast asleep
I'm so scared to lose you, my heart starts to weep
But you're here right now that much is true
And I still wish, for forever with you

Broken promises, shattered dreams
I try to muffle, heartbroken screams

Leave me alone, just let me burn,
I can't handle the return,
of feelings I left, because they burned
but now I fear, they have returned.
So leave me alone, I want to die,
but you won't, so I can't try.

But what do I do with the letters,
with the words that still hold all your love,
some days I just want to burn them,
and as the wind takes the ashes, rise above.

But others I sit and I read them,
and remember when you felt that way,
and breaks my heart when I read them,
because **** it I've got more to say
.
The letter I wrote you sits on my bedside,
I read it again every day,
because I'm haunted by the things have happened,
and by the things that I still need to say.

Soft sweet kiss, of steel on skin,
so many veins, where to begin?
To feel again, for a moment in time,
and see my blood, on this skin of mine.
But for what? I do not know.
My wrists they sting, and it is so.

I can't unbreak your heart, I can't undo the pain
But in my arms it'll never be broken again

Why do the words get stuck in my throat,
why can my fingers not type them out?
Why can't I say just how I feel,
why am I so full of doubt?

I'm but a fixer of broken things,
but there's nothing I can do.
I'm usually good, with things like words,
but not when they are for you.

Oh I once looked into your eyes
And saw myself reflected.
But I never saw what you saw in me,
What's got you so affected.
I now I cannot see you eyes
You're much too far away,
And I still don't know what it is you see,
But oh my love...please stay?

I see you in the ocean, as I stare out at sea,
and miss you when I sit, where you once sat with me.
When I awake from a nightmare, with my heart all a'race,
the one sight I wish for, is your beautiful face.
I miss your laugh when I think of, jokes I wish I could tell,
and I miss your gentle sweetness, when my life feels like hell.
I miss my little angel, when I stare at the rain,
I miss you so much, that my heart fills with pain.
I miss your perfect hair, as I watch the flames dance,
and I miss that first night, when we took that first chance.
But our story's not over, our story's not done,
I might miss you now, but I know you're the one.

I can't, I'm sorry, this is the end
This is the last poem, I'm going to send
I can't not now, not without you.
This is the only thing I think I can do
You won't be hearing from me again
I can't stand living, not with this pain
I'm not over you, it was a lie.
And now it seems, I'm going to die.

If just for a moment, I knew how you felt,
then maybe I could play, the cards I've been dealt.
But as things stand, I don't get the game,
everything's different, but each night's the same

Our every kiss, was cast in shade.
each time your presence, had my day made,
it was the dark of night, or rain, or cloud,
the pathetic fallacy was screaming loud,
yet I ignored it, for I loved you,
but now I know, I wasn't meant to.

If the universe is both infinite and expanding
Then every point's the center, even where I'm standing
But say the center had to be one place
Well then, in that case;
Wherever she is, and wherever she goes
Because she's the center I suppose

With that first chance that you gave me
I messed up and now I see
I didn't deserve you at the time
But I still got to call you mine.

I didn't deserve that second chance
Try as I might with that romance
So I'm not surprised when pressure got high
You walked and left my heart to die

It seems you've come back yet again
Though the last two times I was to blame
I didn't deserve chances one and two
What makes you think I'll ever deserve you?

But you still think I'm worth a shot
And I still tell you that I'm not
But I'm in love and you are too
and all I want is to be with you.

So thank you for, chance number three
Perfect is all I'll let it be.
Because being with you, is the best thing ever
And all I want, is to love you forever

I never could stand cigarettes
That was just the way it went
But now they remind me of your lips and
I think I love their scent

A special place is held within my heart,
For that which has mattered since the start.

The first a jacket, of red and black,
And memories that take me back,
To when I wore two lapels and a hood,
And the days were long, and the nights were good.

But I traded that one, for a hoodie of grey,
That I still have, even to this day.
It seemed so calm, and cool, and still,
When life was not, and I had no skill.

Till overtop I wore the black,
That I still love, when I look back,
And I was smooth, and free, and bad,
In that fake leather that I had.

But the fake is gone, and trenchcoat's in,
But I started loosing, when I meant to win.
I liked that coat, it was brown and slim,
And is a link to accepting, being feminine.

But out with the old, and in with the new,
It's black again, like the old times too.
But who wears this coat, I know it's me,
But who is this coat, going to be?

I feel empty, I feel cold
and now I've no one left to hold
But I would still do it again
because you worth all the pain
Because seeing you smile, it worth these tears
and I'll just live, here with my fears
Our relationship's not something I regret
and It's something I never will never forget

I finally realize, why I could never define the color of your eyes
Because they aren't a normal color, as most people would think
Your skin's the color of innocence so pure
Your hair's the color, of happiness and warmth
Your lips are the color of seduction and love
and your eyes are the color of perfection

Ever since I saw you from afar
and saw your eyes shining like a star,
each one a perfect little ellipse,
I've been dreaming of your lips.
So come on princess, come take my hand
and in this dying light we'll stand
alone together, our fingers entwined
the thought you, dancing on my mind.
My beautiful princess, with lips so sweet
because of you my heart beats fleet,
and when you leave, I will miss you
until this distance we eschew.

After it all, the one thing I know,
it that soon it'll be, my time to go.
To leave behind this world of pain,
and never have to feel again.
No more cuts that sting or tears that flood,
no more smiling at, the fresh drawn blood.
But all along, the one thing I knew,
was that once I'm gone, I'll just miss you.

I bet you think you're really funny,
when you make me sad while outside it is sunny.
I bet you love it that my pain,
goes away, when I'm in the rain.
I bet you love to laugh at the change,
just when my life starts to arrange.
I give up, and I let her go,
only then do feelings show.
Only once, I've found another,
do you point out, I don't want the other.
Cosmic Irony, oh laughing gods,
a good plot twist, what are the odds?

I'm distracted by, your cute, cute face,
and the way your words, make my heart race,
when talking to you, I can't help but smile,
you make me happier, than I've been for a while
Your hair is perfect, beyond compare,
and you're so perfect, that it's just not fair,
you're my best friend, you're sweet and smart,
you're funny and kind, and a work of art.

Nothing compares to your beauty my dear
In your cheeks a red blush,does slowly appear
Cute beyond words, with a voice oh so sweet
Oh the most amazing girl, I ever did meet
Laced fingers, we hold hands, and I can't help but smile
As always around you I'm happy the whole while.

My dear little angel, I  love you,
and know I now, you love me too,
and every moment, was worth it for,
now I've got my, forever more.

Never has, such love been felt,
your every word, makes my heart melt,
we've always been waiting, but oh so soon
the wait will be over, and our love can bloom.

Well here it is, day number eight
and I know this poem's a bit late
but please don't forget what is true
Like the fact that I will always love you

I knew I was never good enough for you
and know you finally, know it too
And I am crying, because you finally see
You always deserved someone better than me
I don't deserve to be happy, to laugh or smile
I haven't deserved to even live, not for a while
But throughout the pain, I force myself to
Because I still live, for the thought of you.
I know I did, a lot of bad stuff
but one day I might be good enough
Maybe for you, or maybe another
But for now I know, we've lost each other.



But I still swear to heaven above
That with you my dear, I'm still in love

I can't believe you ******* left.
As I struggle for each ******* breath
I love you more than anyone could
You said you'd loved me, and I thought you would
But you're gone, I was a fool
I slit my wrists, and blood starts to pool.

There's nothing in my power, to change this in any way
But I loved you when left and I love you to this day
Maybe you won't ignore me forever and one day we will talk
And I'll get my goodbye, one last kiss and that walk
Or perhaps I'll never again hear your sweet, sweet voice
and in the end I guess that's up to you, in the end it is your choice

Your number's deleted, your Facebook blocked
Just like you wanted, I've done as you've asked
My life feels so empty, and my heart has been locked
Now you can forget about me, at long last.

But I won't forget you, I swear on my life
Because I'm still in love, so I pick up my knife.

It's been a week since I made you smile
and I won't do it again, for a long while
But if we couldn't promise that forever
then I can't say it'll happen never.
And so I just sit here, still in love
with you, the girl I'm dreaming of

It's been a week since you last said the words
That my heart fly away like birds
Remember? You said "I love you"
And I replied "I love you too"
But a week has past and now you're gone
I'm still in love, and you've moved on,
But perhaps I could accept that this is it
That at least right now, we just don't fit
If you could stay and be my friend
Then I could accept, that all things end

Why do I keep writing these day after day
if you're never going to read them anyway?

Because I'm still in love, with you my dear
and I can't accept that my worst fear
actually happened and you are gone
happy now, and fully moved on

I go to bed each night, and cry myself to sleep
I wake up in the morning, and just continue to weep.
A physical reaction to the realization of fears
The total loss of everything, that's what causes these tears
Because I know it's stupid, but I'm in love
And you're still an angel, belonging above

Well I managed one day, but I think I went mad
Not that you care, and that's what's making me sad
I dreamt of your touch, of your curves, of your voice
That now are all gone, since you've made your choice
In my dreams, you still loved me
And that's all I want, oh why can't you see?
That without I can't take joy in the warmth of the sun
Because nothing's as warm as your smile was, ***.
I just want to scream out, I love you
But you'll never be here for me to scream to

What do you want? What am I meant to say?
Nothing will ever, change this anyway.
You won't let me die, but please stop checking in,
I'll tell you what's wrong when I know where to begin.
The darkness closes on all of my life,
I've accepted that I deserve all this strife,
but she is gone, and all my friends are too,
the only person still checking, on me is you,
and one day you'll stop, and I'll be free,
and after that day, the world won't miss me

I am only alive because my death would hurt you

Did you miss me my dear, did you miss my voice?
I thought about it my dear, and this is my choice.
You here, in my arms, forever and more,
Because it's you, my dear, who I adore.
I need to apologize, for making you wait,
So little dragon, you still keen for that date?

Every kiss we shared was so desperate,
‘cause we knew it could be our last
Every moment together,
Well now they’re just in the past.

But with him,
You kiss like you’ve got forever
Spend time like…
It’s ending never

You love him
Like you never even looked at me
and you look at him
Like he’s all you see

You always complain you find me too distracting,
and I can tell by your eyes that you're not just acting,
but you are my distraction too,
and even though I don't love you,
I can lie, and say those words,
as we lie on the grass, watching the birds.

Your eyes are still the same grey-blue
In every way you are still you.
Yet your smile’s not warm, your voice not soft
You’re not sending, my heart aloft.
"I love you, I always will"
Yet looking at you, my heart lies still.

I guess we truly, weren’t meant to be,
Since there nothing between you and me.
Not kindness, nor friendship, nor even lust,
I was right, and all is dust.

Don't give up hope, the news could be good,
you've had much more bad luck, than anyone should.
You deserve so much better, and I hope that's what you get,
so on the whole world that is hope, don't let the sun set.