Something i thought was for the long run,
Ended suddenly.
All ties cut.
No closure, no true reasons
People say move on, theres plenty more fish in the sea
But I am stuck
Like a magnet to a metal bar
I know I can't go back,
Yet I don't want to go forward.
I have no interest.
As the weeks go by, a sense of loneliness increases
But I'm content in loneliness for now
Some day I will be ready
To seek somebody else
To move forward, away from a sense of loss and away from heartbreak
I do hope this day will come soon.

It is hard to dream of you at night
Yet not see your face at all in the day
I desperately need to hear your voice
But when we talk I don't know what to say

I'm tired of living life like this
I hate waking up knowing you're not there
I'm still madly in love with you
But you're too happy to notice or care

I just want to call you again
And tell you how everything is wrong
I wish I could let my feelings pour out
I miss you and it's so hard to be strong

It doesn't matter what I do
Or where I go, you're always on my mind
I'm stuck in the past, I can't move on
I'm not ready to leave this behind

I don't want to be with anyone else
I forgive you but I can't forget
I had the best year of my life with you
And I'm not angry, just upset

I ask questions that have no answers
Why did this have to happen to me?
What did I do to do to deserve this?
Who is it you want me to be?

I've tried to be enough for you
But people can't change overnight
And I'm starting to realize
That with you I'll never win the fight.

One moment I think I'm still special
And the next you prove that I'm not
You used to text me all the time
Now I'm just an afterthought

You're not afraid of losing me
In fact it seems like you're doing just fine
It's clear you don't need me to hold or kiss
I wonder who will be your Valentine

I'm alone this year and memories
Twist tightly around my bitter heart
The empty space beside me is just
a reminder that I'm still torn apart

I know that this sounds pathetic
But I cry whenever I can't sleep
I count the days we spent together
Instead of numbers or jumping sheep

It's embarrassing but sometimes
I talk to myself in the mirror
I tell my reflection all of the words
I want to stammer that you'll never hear

I'm longing to feel your arms around me
No one has ever mattered this much
I love how you light my skin on fire
I hate that I'm sick without your touch

I despise the girl I've become
Begging for your warm affection
I fear that despite my best efforts
I wont ever achieve perfection

I wouldn't ask you to be different
I accept you for who you are
In my eyes your flaws are beautiful
I love and appreciate every scar

You're not the person I fell for
You've changed but I still feel the same
Even now you have the power
To drive me crazy just by saying my name

I'm holding onto what we had
Although everyone agrees I should let go
Friends ask me why I can't move on
I just shrug and say "I don't really know"

My bed is too big and cold these days
My head is bursting at the seams
It hurts to sleep alone at night
But at least I have you in my dreams

you will never be forgotten.
ever.
your name twisted into metaphors and colors and distractions will forever
be painted across pages and pages of her favorite brand of notebook,
no matter how many she burns
there will always be one she forgot,
and she will only find it once she had almost forgotten you.
she will find the one Papyrus notebook
and all of your metaphors and colors and disractions will come flooding back,
just like how the ocean in your eyes
flooded her heart all those years ago.

She found herself slowly becoming immune to her emotions. With her lungs incapable of letting the air out, and the pain buried within her unable to turn into tears, she bled in silence

The very first moment you kissed me above the most beautiful night city I’ve ever seen,
It felt like heaven.
I was getting lost in your eyes and the way you touched my thighs.
The only thing that ran through my head was that this is right, I promise, I swear.
Nothing ever felt so real.
I wanted that moment to last forever
Although i hate that word more than anything ever.
This wasn’t just a word.
This was a feeling.
Oh girl, it scared me in the most beautiful way.
-Tereza Balatkova