Nagseselos ako pag may ibang sayo'y nakalapit,
Habang kayo'y magkausap, 'di ko maiwasang mapatitig,
Sa pasimpleng hawak niya, at tinging malagkit,
Kamao'y napapayukom, paano kaniya nalalapitan? —nakagagalit.

Can you recall everything I’ve said to you?
Can you tell me the things we used to do?

Tell me a story once more
About whomever we have been before

Sing me to sleep with your sweet lullaby
And kiss me with your love that doesn’t lie

Vow to me that you will never ever change
Though these words will sound strange

Promise me you’ll stay with me forever
Stay up late and laugh together

Run through the forest and get lost in it
Fields and rivers, coming home with grit

These days might be insignificant
And I know that you are now different

Both of us chasing a different aim
Despite everything, my love stays the same

Let me tell you about a word
A word that I hate
Horrible letters that skip your ears but reach your heart instead
It doesn’t mean what it says
Likely it’s only a cover up...
For what it rather hides away
I’m never coming back, I don’t care or I’m sorry...
It is a word I have never said to you before
Though you have said it many times
Remember now? It starts with a lie and ends with bye

Sorry isn't good enough.
Sorry doesn't mean you will stop doing what you do.
Sorry doesn't mean that I now trust you again.
Sorry doesn't mean your actions will change in any way shape or form.
Sorry doesn't mean that our relationship can now go back to what it used to be.

Sorry means "I know I stabbed a knife in your back. It didn't occur to me that it would hurt. I'll try to remember that next time."

They never remember next time.

It takes a lot to marry someone
they decide to not to trust someone

This world is full of narcissists
they decide to refuse the abuse for someone

Physical, verbal, hidden, silent
torture is rejected in all the forms

Ikaw ang karamay,
Ang aking kaagapay.

Sayong mga yapos at hawak,
Di maikubli ang galak.

Ngunit hanggang saan nga ba aabot,
ang pilit nating sinusugod.

Paglalakbay nating walang direksyon,
Malayo pa ba o nakarating na sa destinasyon.

--it is,  how very
tremendously cute you are,
and how your little stinkerlings
climb all over me;  their
trusting little Spirits drinking in all things, Daddy

And within you, dwells  all of the
fullness of their childlike hope, ******
And within them dwells hope's fire--
aflame within each little set of eye's
sparkle

Yet, beautiful Mommy--

There is a brutality, embedded deeply into
God's Love
that all but compels me to call you out
on almost seemingly-random things:
things that push up (almost fiercely)
against all things within you, stubborn
but they benefit..

                       they benefit.

And you fight against me-- even to your own detriment,
and I am reminded  then of the same fight shown--  emanating
from a young,  forming child's spirit:


           "No"   is the first word that should
                                          form freely
            within the mouth of a young spirit,
                                    aching deeply...

           within the depths  of the loved self
           for the true meaning of the word,  

                                           Autonomy.

An­d there is no loss  of love
in their little movements  towards separateness

And there is no price to pay for speaking the truth in love
nor, is there a payment owed, for speaking it  in defiance
and separateness, even to the point of  eventual separation
need never have to come at the cost of love--

the truly-loved, freely formed, self
is a beautiful, magical thing to behold, indeed.


And your participation in to it all, little-one's sweet Mommy

is a celebration in itself.