I wanted to write
something to unravel what is going on in my head.
Lyrical sentences to explain madness.

But then I  realised,
FINALLY realised
that you are an *******
of the cruelest kind

and you don't deserve
the time I'll waste
forming my disgust at your immaturity
into beauty.

Tonight there's nothing                    
Look left look right                    
Nothing left in sight.                             
 My eyes so open very wide.                
But everything,everyone is left to hide.                                                      
Cause­ from inside I found.                 
 It's the punches we take pound for pound.                                                    
  That­ eventually leave us bruised and down.                                                          
B­ut now there's no one left to frown.                                         
 Nothingness an emotional wreck.                                        
As far as the eyes could see as far as your legs could treck.                        
Now what went wrong along the way                                        
Found someone else yesterday.      
Now all I am, all I was is left behind.                                        
Nothingness down roads we wind.                                              
But what we don't see.                            
Is nothingness is to be free.          
Believe in me                                          
now is what I see                                      
to make a change                      
Completely rearrange                        
Now I see.                                              
That this nothingness is a beginning to a new me....

I knew it was wrong from the very start

I should have never let myself indulge
In this pathetic idea of us

But there I was, hoping to see you around the corner and when you were there my day suddenly had a purpose

I started to need you around and couldn't help but smile when you looked at me

I thought I had picked up on little hints from you.

That maybe you liked being around me as much as I liked being around you

That maybe you waited around the corner until I was there so you could "bump" into me

God I was such an idiot!

Of course none of it was true there were no hints, no waiting behind corners  

To be honest I'm embarrassed, you probably hated every second you were around me

This is why I don't let these sought of things happen to me but somehow you snuck  through the cracks in my armor

And I couldn't get you out

I really don't know why I expected any different

Especially from you...