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ALBERT EINSTEIN POEMS

These are "poems" I created from Albert Einstein quotes, changing a word here and there for the sake of meter and rhyme...



A question that sometimes drives me hazy:
am I or are the others crazy?
—Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch



Relativity and the 'Physics' of Love
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Sit next to a pretty girl for an hour,
it seems like a minute.
Sit on a red-hot stove for a minute,
it seems like an hour.
That's relativity!

Oh, it should be possible
to explain the laws of physics
to a barmaid! ...
but how could she ever,
in a million years,
explain love to an Einstein?

All these primary impulses,
not easily described in words,
are the springboards
of man's actions—because
any man who can drive safely
while kissing a pretty girl
is simply not giving the kiss
the attention it deserves!



Solitude
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Solitude is painful
when one is young,
but delightful
when one is more mature.

I live in that solitude
which was painful in my youth,
but seems delicious now,
in the years of my maturity.

Now it gives me great pleasure, indeed,
to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist
so warmly acclaimed...
and yet it seems vastly strange
to be known so universally
and yet be so lonely.



Morality
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Still, as far as I'm concerned,
I prefer silent vice
to ostentatious virtue:
I don't know,
I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!



Against Hubris
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Science without religion is lame,
religion without science is blind,
and whoever undertakes to establish himself
as the judge of Truth and Knowledge
is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.



War and Peace
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

But heroism on command,
senseless violence,
and all the loathsome nonsense
that goes by the name of patriotism:
how passionately I hate them!

Perfection of means
and confusion of ends
seem to characterize our age
and it has become appallingly obvious
that our technology
has exceeded our humanity,
that technological progress
is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal,
and that the attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful
and then only for a short while.

It is my conviction
that killing under the cloak of war
is nothing but an act of ******.
(I do not know what weapons
World War III will be fought with,
but World War IV will be fought
with sticks and stones.)

Oh, how I wish that somewhere
there existed an island
for those who are wise
and of goodwill! ...

In such a place even I
would be an ardent patriot,
for I am not only a pacifist,
but a militant pacifist.
I am willing to fight for peace,
for nothing will end war
unless the people themselves
refuse to go to war.

Our task must be to free ourselves
by widening our circle of compassion
to embrace all living creatures
and the whole of nature and its beauty.
And peace cannot be kept by force;
it can only be achieved by understanding.



Mystery
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

There are two ways to live your life:
one is as though nothing is a miracle,
the other is as though everything is a miracle.

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious:
it is the source of all true art and all science.
He to whom this emotion is a stranger,
who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe,
is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.



Curiosity
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

The important thing is not to stop questioning.

Curiosity has its own reason for existing.

One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates
the mysteries of eternity,
of life,
of the marvelous structure of reality.

It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.

Never lose a holy curiosity.

People do not grow old no matter how long we live.
We never cease to stand like curious children
before the great Mystery into which we were born.



Character
by Albert Einstein, interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds
because anger dwells only in the ***** of fools
and weakness of attitude soon becomes weakness of character.

Only two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity (and I'm not sure about the former) ;
furthermore, we can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.

The world is a dangerous place: not just because of the people who are evil,
but also because of the good people who don't do anything about it.

He who joyfully marches to music rank and file has already earned my contempt:
he has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.



These are poem about Albert Einstein or in which I mention him ...



Excerpts from “Travels with Einstein”
by Michael R. Burch

I went to Berlin to learn wisdom
from Adolph. The wild spittle flew
as he screamed at me, with great conviction:
“Please despise me! I look like a Jew!”

So I flew off to ’Nam to learn wisdom
from tall Yankees who cursed “yellow” foes.
“If we lose this small square,” they informed me,
earth’s nations will fall, dominoes!”

I then sat at Christ’s feet to learn wisdom,
but his Book, from its genesis to close,
said: “Men can enslave their own brothers!”
(I soon noticed he lacked any clothes.)

So I traveled to bright Tel Aviv
where great scholars with lofty IQs
informed me that (since I’m an Arab)
I’m unfit to lick dirt from their shoes.  

At last, done with learning, I stumbled
to a well where the waters seemed sweet:
the mirage of American “justice.”
There I wept a real sea, in defeat.

Originally published by Café Dissensus



The Cosmological Constant
by Michael R. Burch

Einstein the frizzy-haired
claimed E equals MC squared.
Thus all mass decreases
as activity ceases?
Not my mass, my *** declared!



ASStronomical
by Michael R. Burch

Relativity, the theorists’ creed,
claims mass increases with speed.
My (m)*** grows when I sit it.
Mr. Einstein, get with it;
equate its deflation, I plead!



Relative to Whom?
by Michael R. Burch

Einstein’s theory, incredibly silly,
says a relative grows *****-nilly
at speeds close to light.
Well, his relatives might,
but mine grow their m(*****) more stilly!



Relative Theory I
by Michael R. Burch

Einstein’s "relative" theory
says masses increase, all too clearly,
at speeds close to light.
Well, his relatives’ might,
but mine grow their m(*****) more stilly!



Relative Theory II
by Michael R. Burch

Einstein’s peculiar theory
excludes all my relatives, clearly,
since my relatives’ *****
increase their prone masses
while approaching light speed—not nearly!



Relative Theory III
by Michael R. Burch

Relativity, we’re led to believe,
proves masses increase with great speed.
But it seems my huge family
must be an anomaly;
since their (m)***** increase, gone to seed!



A Child’s Christmas Prayer of Despair for a Hindu Saint

Santa Claus,
for Christmas, please,
don’t bring me toys, or games, or candy . . .
just . . . Santa, please,
I’m on my knees! . . .
please don’t let Jesus torture Gandhi!

Will Jesus Christ cause or allow Albert Einstein and Mahatma Gandhi to be tortured in an "eternal hell" for guessing wrong about which earthly religion to believe? What about Jesus's parable of the Good Samaritan, who put aside religious differences to practice compassion? Did Jesus, who saved all his sternest criticism for hypocrites, talk the talk but fail to walk the walk himself? Or did Christian theologians get something very, very wrong? And what would Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny say about such intolerance and infinite cruelty?  




The Top Ten Einstein Quotations: The Wit and Wisdom of Albert Einstein

You never truly understand something until you can explain it to your grandmother.

We all know that light travels faster than sound. That's why certain people appear bright until we hear them speak.

Only two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity (and I'm not sure about the former) .

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

An intellectual solves a problem. A genius avoids it.

The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once.

The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is at all comprehensible.

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love!

Keywords/Tags: Albert Einstein, poet, poems, poetry, relativity, physics, love, time, genius, stupidity, universe, light
Naveen Malhotra Oct 2020
Roger Penrose
You demonstrated
Black Holes
Direct consequence
Einstein's General Relativity Theory
And lo and behold
You get
Nobel Prize 2020
Einstein didn't
Believe in Black Holes
How ignorant
He was
He didn't know
What was hidden
In his theory
But you Penrose
Standing on
The shoulders
Of Einstein
Became a
Giant of Science
And made Einstein
A Super Giant
Being extraordinarily
Ordinary person
I have never
Dared to learn
General Theory
Of Relativity
I learn that
A Black Hole
Absorbs everything
And may lead to
Some other Universe
I am not
So lucky to
Observe a Black Hole
With scientific instruments
But I have observed
******* in this world
Whose job is to
**** and only ****
How great the
Black Holes are
They absorb everything
Roger Penrose currently associated with Oxford University awarded Nobel Prize 2020 for his research on Black Holes.
Michael R Burch Jul 2020
Excerpts from “Travels with Einstein”
by Michael R. Burch

for Trump

I went to Berlin to learn wisdom
from Adolph. The wild spittle flew
as he screamed at me, with great conviction:
“Please despise me! I look like a Jew!”

So I flew off to ’Nam to learn wisdom
from tall Yankees who cursed “yellow” foes.
“If we lose this small square,” they informed me,
earth’s nations will fall, dominoes!”

I then sat at Christ’s feet to learn wisdom,
but his Book, from its genesis to close,
said: “Men can enslave their own brothers!”
(I soon noticed he lacked any clothes.)

So I traveled to bright Tel Aviv
where great scholars with lofty IQs
informed me that (since I’m an Arab)
I’m unfit to lick dirt from their shoes.

At last, done with learning, I stumbled
to a well where the waters seemed sweet:
the mirage of American “justice.”
There I wept a real sea, in defeat.

Originally published by Café Dissensus

Keywords/Tags: Einstein, Adolph, ******, Berlin, Jew, Jews, Arab, Arabs, Palestinian, Palestinians, Vietnam, Vietnamese, American, Americans, Yankees, Domino, Theory, Dominoes, Jesus, Christ, Bible, Christian, Christianity, Slave, Slaves, Slavery, Israel, Jerusalem, Tel Aviv
Mark Toney Oct 2019
Albert Einstein
Expanded our view beyond the skyline
Reluctant superstar and intellectual force
Relatively speaking, of course!






*
Poetry notes:
Albert Einstein's childhood nickname was "the ***** one." Einstein reportedly was slow in learning how to talk. That, combined with his tendency to whisper words softly to himself before saying them aloud led the family maid to nickname him "der Depperte"—the ***** one, according to "Einstein: His Life and Universe." (thejournal.ie)
6/10/2019 - Poetry form: Clerihew - Sometimes described as the literate cousin of the Limerick, the Clerihew is childish, flat-footed and eponymous, composed of two rhymed couplets designed to lower the tone and cut everyone down to size. These Clerihew poems are perfectly cooked in their own juices, resulting in Clerihew Au Jus ! -
Robert C Howard Jul 2013
If I could be a fly on Einstein’s wall
I’d buzz about from chair to curtain
watch him check out plans and gadgets                                            
and scratch remarks on his papers.
When the clock edged to noon
his stomach would growl,
he’d fold up the prints and say,
“It’s a relatively short walk to the café.”

With Albert out I’d take the run of the place -
practicing banks and dips and vertical lifts.
I’d munch on scraps of Brie and fowl
left fused to the edge of his table.

When the tumblers turned
I’d buzz back to my wall, eager to witness
whatever this sage would chance to say.
He’d go to his desk to file reports
and stack them neatly into a tray.

Without warning he’d rise from his chair
scattering papers across the floor.

“MASS AND ENERGY ARE ONE, ” he’d shout, -
“CRUSHED TOGETHER BY TIME! ”

I’d buzz and swoop and fly circles and loops
and taxi in on his collar.
I’d beat my wings to cool his brain.
But wait…Whose voice do I hear?
Oh, it’s you gentle reader.

“Stop, hold it right there, ****** pest!
It couldn’t have happened that way!
Have you no shame or respect for God’s truth? ”

But I’d stare you down with my compound eye
and scornfully twitch my wings.
Consider this, troubled sir,
you’re the one scolding a talking fly.

*July, 2006
Included in Unity Tree - Collected poems
pub. CreateSpace - Amazon.com
Brandon Conway Apr 2019
Gaze upon the hidden
an impossibility
light is forbidden
in this distorted intangibility

But we see
finally
we see
general relativity
S Bharat Apr 2019
The Secrets

It is mind which brings for what you yearn;
This is the gist of book by Byrne.
“Thoughts are contagious.” I changed mine.
“Let them be positive” said Einstein
Energy, frequency and vibes you ever knew
Are the secrets in Tesla's view.
What Buddha had told made my head reel;
“You can attract what you feel.”
“If you think you lack nothing” said Lao Tzu
“The whole world belongs to you.”

S. Bharat
Rochelle Foles Mar 2019
Black as coal
        Darker than a moonless night sans stars
           As blind to sight as a blizzard to a      
                                               snowflake



   is this mystery


drawn
compelled
inexplicable
      Yet with sooooooooooooooo many black       holes one has to wonder


How ever does this universe exist?


Einstein would have thot it child's play

      "Simple you bafoons,
                  One creates the chaotic world they exist in
                                     and
the other is throughly  entrenched in the theory of a chaotic universe —

so no matter the
                                                head banging


there is a  river running thru
and   rivers   of  l  o  v  e  

are rare

                






And when found
                                           run
                                                       d
                                   E
           E
               p
p
  e
    r

than imagining.



                Flowing strong
                           from time immemorial till time ceases to exist.






            But  rivers

                   Be they crashing as white water over hidden boulders
                    or pooled
                   black as night
                                   masquerading as swimming holes


never,never,never run clear and bubbling
                                                    Like brooks strayed from streams.


rivers  are     a. L. I.                V.   E
           In constant f, l, u,x
          

Always flowing

Ever moving.

So why are you surprised to witness this miracle?  E=MC2  "



                [Silly,  expecting constancy when change is the only constant to be true]
relationships are ever so much more than they appear to the outside world
Gandy Lamb Feb 2019
Albert Einstein once said
that the Gorvanian constant of
Uranium-235 was 1.6*10^-41.
Well,
Albert Einstein died.
I always liked physics. RIP ALBERT EINSTEIN. TODAY MARKS THE 16TH ANNIVERSARY OF HIS DEATH!
ashley marie Oct 2018
I sometimes forget that I do work hard.
I'm no Einstein heaven knows
I do put in the effort though
And when the results come back
I tell myself I deserved it
for not practicing enough

But when I reap what I sow
And life starts piecing itself together
I feel good
I don't hesitate to show my accomplishments
Because there are only so many aspects of life
that one can say they have conquered
I feel blessed to say that I will aspire to be greater
And I will continue to challenge my intellectual muse,
Mentally, Emotionally, Physically.
We all will study the music,
and one day we will harmonize.
Happiness takes time, sometimes its hard to remember.
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