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Aparna Jul 29
since when did I start deceiving myself and those around...

(wince)

...should scrape off this veneer of delusion with blades of veracity
Simon Jul 19
Wearing such an appearance as gentle thoughts is an illusion!
Wearing it for fun is the slow delusion creeping up on you.
Gentle thoughts may be fake... B-but at least I have my own dignity to outshine my true self as my truer appearance!
PS... Gentle thoughts
Gentle thoughts... Is a very remedial option!
Hazel grey Jul 5
I know not who you are
A delusional angel
Or a phantom devil
A potential catastrophe
Or a pocketful of sunshine
An oblivious beauty
Or a deliberate attempt
At hiding the scars
But whatever you are
Please be true
Because this heart
Has been shattered by few
Pete Elliot Jun 30
I woke up on the wrong side of the bed
The nighttime fear stayed with me,
When I should have only dreamt,
I played the victim again though the feelings are hard to mend,
I’m seeing red in my face again

You were right when I said that you were wrong,
You always carried me, to a place like a different song
You were right to be upset, you were right to feel wronged,
You were right when hope was gone.

You said you could take on the world,
You said my needs were yours to be heard,
You cried in your mourning, you cried out it’s pure,
You cried out he loves me I’m sure.

These are the visions in my head,
Someone holding you late at night when it should be me instead,
I pushed you away, trying to pull you close,
How my demons soon became my ghosts

He held you so sweetly I was sure,
He kissed you like you wanted and always gave you more,
We should have just been friends, we wouldn’t have to worry then,
But now my vision shakes to the core,

We built our house so bittersweet.
A new fresh start right before we leap,
It was scary for you, it was familiar to me,
I’m no stranger to nights with little sleep.

As you walk away I’ll sing this song,
Not to you but for me, to see how I play along,
I wanted to help you through this,
We couldn’t trust what we would say,
Always afraid of the next day.

There again he’s there unlike me,
Supportive with no baggage, that I placed at your feet,
If you need a day. If you need a month.
If you need a lifetime you know I’ll always hum
About a girl I knew. About a girl I miss, about a girl who saw me as viscous.

I don’t want to hurt you anymore,
I don’t want to keep banging my head, straight across the floor,
You need something maybe I don’t have
You need someone who’ll give you a chance.

I’ve been so selfish in my mind.
Always worried people were committed like a crime,
I can’t see the truth, I don’t know if there is a lie,
Except when I once said goodbye,

I can’t fix this problem I have.
The doctors and the medicine didn’t always last,
I’m a hate crime to myself, I may never walk in line
But at least I see myself this time.

My imagination is my worst friend,
The panic of grief, over and over again
I didn’t want to lose you, no I didn’t want to waste your time,
But the burden of guilt is mine

I shouldn’t make you feel this way,
Breaking things and making things are harder if we stay,
I don’t want to try to sway you, I don’t want to confuse your thoughts
Because I know how it is when they get lost

And the vision of death comes again.
Replaying the scenario, my familiar trend,
I can never be safe I’ll never sing a song.
Without sorrow from times that are now  long gone.
Sometimes my imagination is the worst scenario. Sometimes my mind makes the surreal real. Sometimes the only thing that feels real is the grief. And I was wrong about the imaginary transgressor. It was me who held you with no baggage. Until I couldn’t hold it to myself. It was me who was supportive. Until we needed a break so I can see again
Bhill Jun 25
to appreciate the delusion you must understand the nightmare
comprehending what veil needs to be penetrated
piercing that veil with dignity and awareness for certainty
be confident that the delusion is not real....

Brian Hill - 2020 # 173
hiba sajid Jun 22
Is happiness a mere delusion?
A brief distraction
of pleasant emotions,
to escape from the bleak realities of life?

Are memories a mere illusion?
An allusion
to reminisce about the happy past
& escape from the bitter realities of life?
What is happiness? why do you want to be happy? why does your happiness make someone else sad or envious.? Love above all, kindness beyond all
Jason Trinh Jun 20
Vintage vanity
...
Virtuoso of disguise
...
Beautifully broken
...
Glass-made compromise
...
Petal picking sanities
...
Episodic merchandise
...
Fantastic false reality
...
My sweet sweet paradise
Lieke May 20
Fill your lungs with air, they say
These black fireworks are getting closer
Crawl around, it's fun, they say
The slower I move, the deader the knot gets
You're dizzy, shadowed, they say
Apple after apple, only glowing poison

You'll see, you'll see
You'll want to someday
But all I want is out.
20 May, 2020
That wretched face
Inside of that beautiful skin
I couldn't see
I cannot believe

Swirling in the delusion
You created
Your tainted caress
I hope we never ever met
But the smile that gave away
My trust
Your illusion

Now I'm so sick
of your *******!
Its clearer than ever
You dragging me in your downward spiral

You've tore me inside out
But I've finally figured out
What really must be done
No mercy! No remorse!

Oh my beautiful liar
You cold blooded *****!
Never I thought I would do this.
Now I'm on my knees
You brought me down to your level...
Asominate May 14
Guilty

I point
And three fingers
Pointing back at me

Memories
Not forgotten
Even though I plea

The knives,
They are calling
Yet I still don't bleed

No point in my destruction
Since I cannot feed them

Sharp blades
Evade
My self destruction

Afraid
To pay
For loss of function

Every
New day
Is a new problem

Cut me off
(Save me!)

I'm coming out
I'm caving in
Tell me do you like me now
Let me begin

By burning all the cradles
Uninstall the training wheels
Enstrangement's just a label
And I don't give feels

(I cut me off
I shut you out
I'm caving in
Do you like me now?

Not good enough
I've never been
Disconnection
I'm the alien)
👽 nation.
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