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Janessa Jul 2014
In my storm
you were the gentle whisper
that calms the mad waves..*
A stray of light
from summer sun
that gives warmth in the cold
This battle I fought alone is no more,
with your touch that fills up what’s missing
Emptiness is no more with just a breath that I take from you
You willingly offered,
Forgetting everything that should matter
For a moment, though I know this is not love
But for the first time, I felt right
Even if it is wrong
I don’t know what you see in me
I don’t know if I deserve this
But somehow I know
These memories with you
I will cherish and keep
The soothing words of want and admirations

I don’t want to know when this ends
I just want to live for a moment
Janessa Jul 2014
That sweet and gentle kiss..
Something I’m not prepared for
Something that I didn’t expect
I ask myself why
Why you had to be such a gentle soul
Why a simple touch gives me peace
You will never be mine
That’s what I’m sure of
I can never call you mine
I know this will end soon
I’ll treasure it
Every little time we had and we will have…
‘Cause I know this isn’t right
And we will end soon
But there are no regrets
Janessa Jul 2014
Your lips,
trying to feel it
When I’m alone
All by myself
Imitating your moves
How it gives me chills
And sparks
I’m trippin’ now
All because of your lips
Your touch
How it felt
Your hands
How it caresses me
That caress
How it sends peace inside
Your eyes
The sincerity in it
Imagining you
In many ways
In this four cornered room
Those arms
Encircling me
When it get the chance
Those stares
Even when I try
Not to stare back
My body
Disapproving
Acting naturally
Cant seem to hold back
Looking at nowhere
Then, I see you
You got me bad
When I close my eyes
You lingers
At the back of my mind
You don’t know
How much You affects me
My guilty pleasure
I want to go away
………But I want you near me
Embracing you
Leaning on your shoulder
The comfort it gives
I am addicted
How not to want you
The force you had
The best one I dealt with
But I won’t call it love
You will not know
How I swiftly fell
…….At least not out loud
Note:
For that someone: thanks for making me feel special for the first time. I just want to cherish every chance I have while I still can.

Music Background: Bloodstream by: Stateless
Angels or Devils by: Dishwalla
CAndleburn by: Dishwalla
Distance : Christina Perri
Janessa Jul 2014
I shouldn't have done that..
I shouldn't have said that
I should not hope for more
It's hard to sink it in
this dream of mine of you
Why can't I digest the truth
this stupidity of me
Haven't learn anything
Haven't learn from the past
You will never be mine
Fooling myself again and again

I just stood here
stayed..
for nothing....
you're not here
you will never be..

another mistake..
mistake again...
no one  to blame but me
simple as that

you got what you want..
the best of me ....
for a short period of time..

I am a fool
I am a fool
you won't be there
no embrace
no kisses
and I can't ask you
.... for anything

I saw this coming
I thought I was prepared
but I was wrong
I am a fool
wanting you here
wanting you near
but this has to stop

You're way too important
than my own drowning passion
I'm used to this...
it will be gone soon...
I am nothing but a fool
I must give it all away
let this go..
cause you're far more precious
than anything I should feel
  Jul 2014 Janessa
Aeya Jean Johnson
I am lost.
Yet,
Something is telling me you are just like me.
Maybe
We were put in the darkness
To find each other.
Scibile Definition: Something which it is possible to know.
Janessa Jul 2014
Let me out
I’m your art
I’m your life
I am pain
Therefore I am beauty

Let me out
Don’t do this
You know you need me
You can’t keep me
I know you need me

I’ll have the sins
I’ll take the punches,
I’ll be torn apart.
I’ll break a bone if I had to..
I won’t let them destroy you
I won’t let them get the best of you

I am evil...
But I’ll be the one who’ll protect you

Don’t worry about me.

I was made to bear the pain,
To absorb the madness
To swallow all of your fears..

Embrace me.
Accept me.
And you’ll never feel empty
Again...

Deep within you
I rest..
I know you can feel me too.
Somehow you know,
I'm waiting here for you
Waiting for you….

To let me out…
Janessa Jul 2014
we're so used by being used
how long do we need to bleed
it's just happening all over and over
we always come back to this
like we never learned a thing
I know you know how this feels
played by somebody's hands
tortured by their schemes and playtimes
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