Tired and gentle waves of the mighty ocean
receding to the horizon like the slowly setting sun
But even when it's dark, they will come back
and the waves will bring you back home

And when the sun rises again the next day
slowly pushing the eternal darkness away
diminishing it to just the shadows
the dawn will bring you back home

the refreshing smell of the summer breeze
the mild sunlight filtered from the trees
may just make the world a little bigger
the wilderness will bring you back home

the younger self, abandoned and ignored
will replace the ghosts secretly abhorred
and when it smiles in all sincerity
you will see that you were always home

If it kills you, it kills you. Something someday definitely will. But until it does, until it gets so hard that breathing in and out seems impossible, that the thought of waking up keeps you from sleeping at night, that the thought of not being able to sleep another night gets so heavy that you'd rather drown yourself than try to swim across the **** ocean that everyone else is swimming in, maybe a little closer to the shore, maybe a little further to the other side, you better live and make sure that it's worth the death that you've been dreading for so long!

The nights are getting colder
The daylight doesn't hurt anymore
The flowers that blossomed recently
have all already been plucked

A buried pain finds the surface
At a loss that's about to come
This is when I let go of
everything that made me whole

You are the leaves of glory
dazzled in beauty for all eternity
You live studded on the queen's head
You die like the collapsing star

I am the tree, barren otherwise
the crown that has lost authority
the chaos amidst the nebula
I often get left in the storm's wake

I do not yet know why I'm sad
Perhaps life's been a little too long
Perhaps a little too short
Perhaps a little bit empty
Perhaps a little too full

I just know that when the heart aches
I need to write, I need to embrace life
I need to live it with everything it takes
And somehow I'm all too aware
That nothing at all lasts forever

To the misery and the unbearable losses
To the days of hysterical laugher
To the paranoia that haunts me still
To the calming waves of a violent ocean
Everything ends at the shores

What is it to be brave, to be courageous
To stand tall in the face of fear and know
That you might die, but you won't live anyway
The night may be dark and uncertainties may lurk
I might not make it through the night but the sun will rise

Can I still smile, laugh even, just for a while
In the midst of this torment, can I fake a life
I might go silent from time to time
I might sit all alone, as the wind have me in shivers
Write my heart out and then burn it to ashes

And as the fire dies down, I'll write a bit faster
The heartache takes away with it my words
And I always struggle, just to be devastated
For a little while longer, just till I get rid of this trash
But just as always, nothing indeed lasts forever!

In sleepless nights I often wonder
How could I lose the love
I never really had?

Faking a proper life and living a lie
hiding what has been long dead inside
the damsels in distress find him there
and he takes it away, their dead and their rotten

and he gives them life,happiness and love
and they give him themselves and quite right so
he owns them, cherishes them and nurtures them
he strengthens them for hurricanes to come

he knows when they're ready to be on their own
to stand tall in midst of a storm
to face the tides and to still move on
and that is when he lets them go

he breaks them again, even smaller so
but he doesn't let him rot inside them
he walks away with a will of stone
knowing full well that they will be fine

they will pick up those pieces and be whole again
now stronger than they were ever before and much more beautiful
for beauty does not lie within the eyes of the beholder
rather it does in the ruins of a destructor

When the excruciating screams
of your dying dreams
pull you back into the pit
Do you dive right back?

Do you hold on? cling even?
to your darkness in the face of the sun
or do you let go
of the demons that raised you?

Do the deep oceans tempt you?
do they make you want to be one with the blue?
or do you thank the shores
and the safety of your skin?

do you not fake a smile
every day, every once in a while?
or do you feel happy
knowing that you exist, in vain?

do you close your eyes in despair
and pray to the only one who cares?
or do you grieve on the shoulders of reason,
get right back up on your feet, only to drown?