...unless it's with me.

Dating you is anti-climatic
and I'd be ****** if I ever
succumb to a part of me
begging to be cut loose from you.

I don't want to be swallowed by
the euphoria derived from
vintage pictures and videos;
I know that the saccharine
comfort will be both
short-lived and lachrymose.

I don't want to have to
flip through your new pictures daily,
searching for remnants of the love we shared
through the new love you'd then be experiencing.

Usually,
I'd wish nothing but the best
but I want the worse for you.

My mental is too detrimental
to handle you and another.
I don't want to wake up
from constant nightmares
leaving my stomach tied in knots
you'd only see on TV.

I don't want to sit at family dinners alone
when you were suppose to be there with me.
I don't want to have to look at chocolate desserts
and remember how it's your favorite
so although I detest chocolate,
I eat it anyway to somehow
suppress the feeling of you not being there.

I don't want to watch you fall in love with another.
You carry a part of me
every time you're apart from me
and I'd rather you cheat
than to follow what seems like tradition
and leave.

I don't want to watch you fall in love with another.
I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve
and I'm down on both knees
pleading please,
oh please

I don't want to watch you fall in love
...unless it's with me.

What if i told you

Loving you
Is the
Most magical,
Natural,
Effortless
Thing I've done in my life.

What if i told you

You inspire me to be
Courageous,
Kind,
Expansive,
Unapologetically me.

But instead, I'll choke on these words and tremble at the slightest notion that one day you'll find out.

We are our own worst enemies
Everybody is a critic

You never loved your body and would cover the mirror anytime you saw it
It was never good enough for you and felt for others also
You told me how disgusting you were, how overweight and sunken your faced looked.
Told me how ugly you were and how your legs werent worth looking at
Until the day I first saw you I had no evidence to argue, but then I did see you...
...and you blew my mind
You were drop dead gorgeous in my eyes, the way your eyes shyly looked at me and the corners of your mouth creeped upward.

One day I saw you in nothing and my heart did it race
You were always beautiful, never once not, morning or night
But in nothing your body was perfect, your shape, and just every bit of you from head to toe I loved

Yet no matter what I said...you rejected the idea and refused to believe you were...
You couldnt see what I saw or feel what I felt...and it sunk my heart to see you view yourself so negatively

My perfect imperfection

I saw beauty in you where youd never felt like acknowledging, and the day I saw...there...you knew I wouldnt love you the same...but I did
I told you I loved you unconditionally and I thought you were perfect and you smiled
I thought id planted the seeds inside yourself to finally love you for you...

...guess I was wrong...
The mirror was covered this morning...

Okay, so here's a poem challenge! 6 days until Valentine's Day, well here's something to do:

There are a couple days left before Valentine's Day! So every day until then, write a poem about someone you care about. Each day, write about a different aspect of the person you care about. Use the tag: #vdayaspects
This person can be anyone, imaginary, real, someone you hate. Just someone you know well.

this is my facebook
real facebook
instead of connecting with fake friends for numbers
i'm connecting with friends i never knew i had
people here pick me up when i'm sad
a community that breaks hoplessness and fads
a place where beauty doesn't mean perfect
my facebook is right here with everybody
theres no santas list
everybody has been naughty
and i don't put my life on display
i display my feelings
because no matter what
i know you won't judge
so i'll be the first to say

*i love you facebook