but when i said
‘living on the edge,’
this was never
what i meant.
what i meant was real party all night
without parents’ permission;
not a pity party at night
with my self-destructing notions.
what i meant was real rollercoasters,
or go on life adventures;
not roller coasters
of all my life’s emotions.
what i meant was swim in the ocean,
or face my darkest fear.
not an ocean of my
darkest fears face me.
but i when i said
put ‘happy’ and ‘die’ together,
i meant to actually ‘die happy’
not to be ‘happy dying.’
wrote this piece for National Mental Health Week.
how is it
condemnable when we
only choose to
Post-Pride Week blues.
Almost asleep when my phone ticked;
'A notification,' it says.
Your name was there, you liked my photo.
And my stomach drowned in butterflies—
Scratch that—moths, surely they're moths.
Stronger, buzzier, like your power
To occupy and stay in my brain
With that single heart emoji beside your name.
Thinking that the double tap
Is as if you love me just the same.
Shoutout to those whose crushes follow them on instagram. Mine doesn't. :( HAHAHA
— The End —