I never know when I'm going to fall asleep,
and each dream I have is a nonsensical surprise.
I'm sure if I look hard the messages are deep,
but I never know what is true and what are lies.

When I'm awake I'm still always in bed,
each second I feel my soul drain more and more,
how strong does one have to be to defeat their head?
Or to not immediately drop down to the floor?

I'm cursed to be moved by many things,
and sometimes I'm not sure if I am real.
But still I rely on mood rings
to tell me how I should feel.

I like taking hot baths, so hot I can feel the burn,
'cause even when I'm feverish I can barely stand the cold.
My pink skin proves there's lessons some just choose not to learn,
and I'm not sure if it's foolishness or me trying to be bold.

Each season has it's emotion it brings,
and when they leave there's parts of me they steal.
But still I rely on mood rings
to tell me how I should feel.

I speak to the air that's around me,
pretending it's a ghost of the past.
Inbetween where dreams meet reality,
there's a depth that's so very vast.

I've always been one to fear change,
in a weird way I find comfort in the pain,
I'm not sure if that's common or deranged,
but the grass is always greener after some rain.

In stories both angels and demons have wings,
and both have someone to whom they kneel.
But still I rely on mood rings
to tell me how I should feel.

walking away
isnt always giving up
sometimes
its realizing
that theres nothing left
to stay and fight for

A river flows through the backyard
Panic attacks under whiskey breath
Legs numb and gasping for air
Drowning in the driver's seat.

i am thankful
that i still have
my memories
because they were all
that you couldnt take

You were the light
at the end of my tunnel;
The rest at the end of my day
and I thought I'd have forever
to say the words I'd like to say.

But life moves on
And time goes by.
People change
and feelings die.

Now my tunnels have no ending
my days end in an empty bed
and I sit alone surrounded
by the words I never said.

I haven't written anything in so long because everything that comes out of my mouth sounds like a broken record. I can't even think straight because all the voices in my head keep screaming, and then to make matters worse we are actually screaming. Everyone always says love makes you crazy but why do we always get this crazy. The burning sensation in my heart used to excite me and now all it does is scare me. We used to be united and now we can't even find a way to be in the same room. I don't understand why we can't see that the only answer to life has been me and you. I used to write beautiful poems about the way you made me feel and I still am but only this time they are more about tragedies and how we ruined the one good thing we had going for us.

I am aware, logically,
That when Winter comes and all things die,
The numb cold of snow will eventually clear
And the flowers will bloom
And my plum tree will bud and provide fruit.
Spring will warm all of creation once more,
Rain will wake my skin.
But today all is frozen,
Iced over and silent with​ no growth to be found,
And logic aside,
This feels
Eternal.
I cannot feel the sun that does not warm my skin.
I cannot taste the rain that does not touch my lips
And the flowers that have not yet regrown
Show no signs of life, here.