In a world where mercy is fading away,
And where hatred and darkness play,
Look towards the Beloved and pray,
Remember the dawn of love's eternal day.

Papa passed away in June
By January the farm was gone
Somber soundtrack of a weekend
in Athens
Blowing through my brain
Blitzkrieg
Unannounced, Uninvited
Blazing bright blue
Like your pleading eyes
On your deathbed
Like the sky,
Above the farm
Over the tallest evergreens
Playing melodies of grief

my bedsheets won't stop
strangling me
each night,
twisting around my
legs and arms and neck
until i cough myself
awake.

i'm breathing blood
once i'm finally up.
it's 5am and i think
i've been dying in my
sleep.

i turn the fan on
and the heat up
praying i can
fling my sheets
to the floor while
i fight with slumber,
waving it like a white
flag in the
dark.

i need to stop
setting myself on fire
to keep you warm.

i spent my life trying to please
someone with a twisted disease
i broke myself down
and tucked my feelings away
to become the person
they wanted me to be
i let myself be watched
through the glass of a two sided mirror
of a sociopath
i wallowed my spirit away
and begged for acceptance
but there’s nothing in the world
that i could do
to let the narcissist know
that i am human too

our lips will never meet
nor our fingers intertwine
and so bless my dreams
for indulging what's not mine