it's a long long wait
for something uncertain
we will spend months eager
years, hurting
but oh, when the time comes
we shall hold each other tight
take deep breaths and close our eyes
I smile a wide smile inside my head
a few years is nothing compared to the eternity ahead

this heart of mine
will not keep still
this fast pace rhythm
won't stop until
my lungs continue to
gasp for breath
until this soul wanders
to the arms of death
my love for you
shall never die
it shall go on
as I am alive

She said that night
tell me something about love
I stood still
my mind racing
it was as if my head
came to an abrupt halt
but my heart almost immediately
came up with words
I don't think existed yet

I wanted to tell her
love is looking into her eyes
and melting on the spot
but somehow I couldn't
so I looked her into her eyes
and smiled

I wanted to tell her
love is caring
but somehow I couldn't
so I grabbed her a glass of water
she smiled

I wanted to tell her
love is two hearts
dancing to the same rhythm
but somehow I couldn't
so I asked her what movie
she'd like us to watch later
still smiling
she had a confused expression
the notebook
she wanted to watch the notebook

I wanted to tell her
love is patient
and that I couldn't stand that movie
but somehow I couldn't
so I kissed her on the cheek
and said ok

I wanted to tell her
love is admiration
but I couldn't
so I stared at her
and told her she was beautiful
all throughout the movie
even though you were teasing me
that I was missing half of the storyline

I wanted to tell her
love is warm
but somehow I couldn't
so I wrapped her in my arms
even though we were already
warm under the covers

I wanted to tell her
love is happiness
but I couldn't
so we laughed all night
exchanging jokes no one
else would understand

I wanted to tell her
love is so many things
but somehow I couldn't
so I loved her
and hoped she would understand

it isn't until you let go
that you notice the blood
dropping from your palms
it isn't until you look down
that you notice how close
you are to the bottom
it isn't until I distanced myself
that I realized you were
slowly killing me

loving you was my
favorite thing to do
because it
felt so good
loving you
was like breathing
to me
I didn't need a book
to know how to do it
I just
do
loving you
felt so natural
like it was something
I knew how to do
for a long time
and I felt giddy
thinking about my
newfound ability
it feels as if my heart
was always under
a warm blanket
so safe
so secure
longing for yours
under the covers
it feels as if my hands
we're naked whenever
it was not linked with yours
it feels as if every breath
I take was being clouded
with you
you
you
if only
you knew how
to love me too
because for you
loving me was
learning a new language
playing the piano
driving a car
it just doesn't come
as naturally
as walking
talking
breathing
in
out
in
out
I still don't know
how to stop

sun

from here the sun looked small
a yellow dot in the distance
so far yet its warmth seemed
to reach me as if it were a breath away
I loved the way it shone
my how beautifully did it shine
I wondered if it shined as bright
if I were close to it
the sun beckoned me to swim
in his golden rays
it shone brilliantly as I came closer
yet little did I know
as it shone
it also burned
it hurt
but my heart was too busy
admiring the sun
my eyes were to focused on etching its beauty in my mind
fearing I would forget it
if I looked away for
just a second
it was painful
loving you
but my did it feel so good
eventually
I had to leave you
burnt skin
a broken heart
it was an honor to
find out how much you shone
and how much it hurt to be burned
by you
my god
the sun looks small from here
doesn't it?

I let my heart
dance with yours
even for just
a moment
but I knew
this song wasn't
meant for us