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And so it returns
My oldest friend
Oh how you render me numb
And sad
So ******* sad
I left you behind on purpose
But you don't care
You've caught up to me
And so depression I must bear
You enter the room and embarrass me so
That overwhelming off putting sad face you make me show
You push my friends away
You make me lose sleep
You make me hate my job
You make life bittersweet
You make me lethargic
I'm just so ******* beat
Oh depression my old friend
You will always be my defeat.
Where to go when home is empty and your lover's arms are crossed?
The edge of a bridge of course
A spider
She is huge and leggy
I jump
But I stay seated, feet dangling
She is spinning her web I mustn't disturb her for this is her place
This is her hour
This is not mine

I decide to live
All this time I thought I had become shallow
That I lacked substance
Worth
A life worth living
But now I realize how shallow you are
Shallower than the pool of tears
I cry for you
Get out of your ******* bubble
Put down your phone
And start talking to me
I'm going through depression and all you can do is demean it
Why don't you just look up
And catch my tears
And show you understand
We are an amazing couple but I can't fight the screen for your eyes
Or be stuck inside your room
Any longer
I've lost myself trying to fit your routine
When you can't show a little compassion or eye contact
You are my world now
I'd love it if I could get to know it better
And that maybe you'd show an interest in what you don't know
About me
Shallow lover
Look beyond my smile and my quiet voice
There's a lot lurking deep below
It's an everlasting well
I have the richest waters
If only you would close Facebook
And dive in
  Oct 2015 Lachrymose and Lies
Riya
Forgive me father for I have sinned.
His hands were on my hips as we swayed to the beat
Our lips danced together,
Our moans creating a hymn.

He was kneeling above the altar created specially for him,
Caressing his devotee,
Appreciating her beauty.

Forgive me clergy, for I gave him my ring,
How many Hail Mary’s will wipe off this sin?

Father, you told me my purity was all I had.
If this is what Hell feels like,
I would gladly sin again and again.
Everyday is a long walk through quick sand
The slower the day goes
The deeper
I sink
I have to keep moving or else I end up drowning
And I suffer a fate worse than death
It's knowing I can't fight it
Because the more I do
The lower I go
The deeper
I sink
My fingers hit a high note
As each tear fell to the beat
Eyes a foggy
broken window
Of bittersweet defeat
It's an orchestra of sorrow
Suckling a hopeful ****
We lie
and believe in tomorrow
Stumbling down an empty street
For we will always be alone
And you and I
won't ever
meet
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