I don't know
If I could ever
Make you understand
But I can paint a picture clearly

My parents
The doctors
All made a desperate attempt
To save my right eye

Only 6 years old
And I was already
Doomed to go blind

I was not dyslexic
But I wrote backwards
I could see
Out of my eye
But I had to accept at a young age
That I would never see
Perfectly

Later on
I realized
I will never accept
Going blind
In my right eye

My sight fades
As my vision deteriorates
With each passing day
Sometimes
I can't feel my eye

I have to hold out an arm
As to avoid running into things
It's so embarrassing

When I was Young
Kids made fun of me
Because I wore an eyepatch
It was like a bandaid
At night
My mom would tear it off
And I would cry myself to sleep
In pain
Because my skin came off with it
And my nerves were on fire

The doctors said
I'm too old now
I will never see out of that eye
Ever again
I couldn't help
But fight the tears
This diagnose felt terminal
After all the hard years

I still can not accept
That I will never see again
Going through life
With a blind side
I was never meant to fit in

All my life
Starting young,
I was told
How to act
How to sit
How to dress
How to talk
Like some robot

I hate to say it
But I'm human
I will make mistakes

I never knew who I was
Because I was always told who to be
And no one could ever understand
To the extent that I mean

Kids hated me
Said I was weird
Because wearing skirts everyday
Well, it was weird
But that was my life
Sheltered and nice

But corruption found its way inside
Like a serpent
I was a place for darkness to hide

I acted out
To make a stand
Became the rebel
That I really am
Took a knife to my skin
With crimson red
I turned my purity to sin

"Katherine"
It means pure, yknow
And there was a time
When I could have been

Pure
Is what my parents wanted me to be

Perfect
In the eyes of everyone
Except me

Strange
Ostracized in my own world

I doubt anyone could even imagine
All the pain I went through
I was a freak
With the face of an angel
So innocent
More like ignorant
But without bliss

I was the angel
Who never smiled
The angel
Who never spoke
The angel
Who cried in her room all alone
Even when I was
Just five years old
The angel with shackles
Clamped to my ankles
The chains pulled me to earth

I am an angel
With broken wings
And no one could ever
Feel empathy

Today came too fast
It's time to depart
Although you are leaving
I will give you my heart

Everyday could be your last
If you return
With your scars
And your burns
I'll be waiting for you
There is nothing else to do

I'll pray every day
That you'll be okay
And when I close my eyes
I'll think of
You

Drips fall
From the ceiling above

As water seeps through
The floor upstairs

Just as the rain
Falls down
Eventhough
The world outside
Is cold

There you lie
In a damp
And ****** grave

I never understood
A thing about pain
Until you left my heart cold
In the November rain

Nothing but
a heart that aches
Can become silent
Leaving a crimson stain

You left yourself
Exposed
******
And
Dead

The water
Became your refuge
As you slipped
From this life
To the next

A day does not go by
That I don't feel the pain begin
Again
A dark cloud
Haunting me

A year goes by
And there is no rain
It's frozen
As I've been sense that day