Your silence used to be warm
Used to be lovely.

Your silence used to be close
Enduring
Yet addicting.

Your silence was something
That makes me smile
Because when you were silent
You will smile
And your smile
Are indeed
One in a million.

But now
Your silence is distant
Threatening everything
Even me
From closing in.

Your silence
It pushes me away
And whenever I look in your eyes these days
I can see
The old you
Has gone
Along with your enticing silence.

I dreamt last night and it was a dream filled with red flowers.
You, pinning me down.
Sweat.
The beach.
Big bodies of water.
Gunshots.
Rivers of blood.
Funerals.
Funeral flowers.

You said that lilies are funeral flowers but I kept dreaming about roses.

You pushed me to the edge and I awoke in a cold sweat and it's like breathing but not getting enough oxygen in and you're drowning and I'm still dreaming about roses.

You kissed me on the cheek and whispered sweet nothings into my ear while we followed the moonlit path through fields and forests and by the time we reached our final destination it was sunrise and I guess I understand now why you say lilies are funeral flowers because they're everywhere now, they're all I can see and you're gone.

You lead me to these lilies and then you left and nothing hurts quite like being alone with your funeral flowers.

There's a fine line between love and lust. He loves me, he loves me not. We were everything you could dream of; summer days and winter nights. He loves me, he loves me not. We were lazy mornings in bed, we were picnics in the afternoon, we were evenings spent watching golden sunsets and we were late night drives listening to old records. He loves me, he loves me not. We were unexpected rainfall and delayed trains. He loved me, he loved me not. We met in the spring, he was the warmth from the sun and I was the April showers that drowned him out. He loved me, I loved him not.

I can't let you down,
But I let me down;
I've lost myself to you,
I'm oblivious to myself now.

If I cried for help,
You wouldn't hear me;
It is in your means,
But you wouldn't save me.

Your eyes could heal the broken hearted,
Still you choose to use it to burn me;
The mirror reveals the superficial,
But deep inside it's misty and unclear, it's empty.

For all the world could be lost,
And I'd still be lost in your thoughts;
In the wonder of imagination,
In the beauty of loneliness.

Yet I can't let you go because,
You make me believe in magic;
Although I know it's an illusion,
I will be your fool dancing in the rain.