Wait.
Does she not trust you?
Have you tried looking at her differently?
Maybe she had trusted too many people in the past
who broke her trust. (And her heart.)
Maybe the last guy she loved, told her the same things
that you did.
"Don't worry honey, you can trust me."
"Hey, I promise you I won't leave."
Maybe she's pushing you away because she knows
how this is going to end. (she'll be hurt again.)
Maybe she's too broken to try again.
Maybe she just needs some time (or forever.)
Maybe she just needs herself right now.
Or maybe someone who could love her better
and remove all her fears away.
But you won't understand that obviously.
(because you won't stay.)



(Nobody ever does.)

I see things that are not to be seen
And I hear things that are silent for the ears.

They tell me to not go against the flow
of the river
that's been flowing since the begining
of the universe.

But I don't see my fault in all this
I am gifted as well as cursed.

In the graveyard of the forgotten,
I see the dead rising up
With their faces burned and full of scars.
Their eyes turn hollow when they see some life
But I see them looking at me as the child of the dark.
They sit around the burning bones and sing
the songs of the unheard souls.
They sing and dance and celebrate
the life that they never lived
as they curse the great pearl for
changing the course of their stars.

I was sitting against a black tree
with my arms wrapped around my chest.
My skin was grey with black spots
and my eyes were closed, as if dead.
Then appeared a red spot of blood
in the center, around my heart.
A perfectly shaped circle it was,
a drop rolled down and it all fell apart.

We buried them two months ago and watered the seeds with our tears.
Today, the nature witnessed a bud growing as the sky got all cleared.

Up in the north, away from all the filth,
there's a land of pure where angels descend.
And live between the rivers and trees.
There's a place known as Kashmir.

A place that has sacrifices it's people
just for the sake to get an identity.
A place that's been crying since ages
There's a place known as Kashmir.

A place that's been bleeding for freedom.
A place that's been a victim of tyranny.
A place that need to be heard just once.
There's a place known as Kashmir.

A place that's been divided among nation.
A place that has suffered a great deal.
Let them live, let them breathe.
Let there be a place known as Kashmir!

We stand together as a nation today
For we cannot see our heaven bleed.
Kashmir belongs to Pakistan.
And Pakistan belongs to Kashmir.

Those days when I can't write,
I sit around and dive into the ocean
of thoughts that are held back
somewhere in my mind.

Those days when I can't write,
I sit around with a pen in my hand
and scribble random words down
hoping for them to make any sense.

Those days when I can't write,
I sit around and feel depressed
as I try to find a break through
from all the boredom and dullness.

Those days when I can't write
I sit around and type this poem
that was supposed to be another waste
instead of something that actually rhymes.

We were lying on the hood of
your old Chevy
under the stars with cigarettes
between our lips
as we watched our dreams somewhere in
between the smoke that
danced in the air.
The street lights started to look blurry
as I inhaled in
the figments of your dreams
as well as mine.
Your dreams tasted different;
a bit too unsweetened
that burned the inside of my lungs
lighting a fire.
They unwound my muscles
that were in a chaos since centuries
making all the stars align.
I sighed deeply asking for
another cigarette
as I whispered,
"One last time..."

Under the sober moon we sat
as we gulped down
bottle after bottle of that sweet wine.
You handed me another
and whispered,
"Are you not drunk enough
to fall in love with me already?"
I laughed out loud
as I thought how
unaware you were honey.

Only if I could sleep at night
and see the dreams like a normal person,
I'd start hating the nightmares.

The stars share tales with each other
as they sit around the fire
and they mention of the broken girl who
amazed the world with her smile.
Every one of them burns with envy  
for she shines the brightest in the sky.

They were kneeling in front of Him to ask for forgiveness.
He liked their prayers so much that He took them straight to heaven.

We are made of stars; you and me.
Stars that shined too bright
to exist together
or be near to each other.

We are made of stars
with different destinies
but once we were together
and that's what I like to believe.

Even on the last day
when the world will fall apart
and this whole universe won't sustain.
I have a  hope
though for a fraction of time
that I will meet you again.

Sometimes you have to take
a sip from the bowl
of sins
just to know **
bitter it tastes.

I wrap myself around
in this ***** bed sheet as I
try to be a part of
a perfect family picture.
This is how it goes  
every one taught me
that you're supposed to just smile
pretending to be happy.

On a board with wheels, I roll myself around
on the streets of this city
from dusk till dawn.
I observe how people travel in
expensive cars and wear better clothes
yet they look troubled to me
whereas I find happiness
on the side of the road
where I sit all day and beg
for some money.
With the help of my hands
I push the wheels for I don't have
working legs.
But I don't complain
at least I am blessed with the rest.

I don't remember all the names
of the boys I fell in love with
in the days of my youth.
But I have preserved
each and every one of them
in the words that I scribble.
So which poem are you?

By the great river of Indus, I sit all alone
As I try to find the answers in my own reflection.
Can these waves guide me to my destination?
I can't turn back; I am far away from home.
The ripples are forming just by throwing of a stone.
Will I ever find my salvation?
I envy the birds that can fly without any hesitation.
Oh the great river of Indus! I am all alone.

The soft breeze of the water whispers a song
As if it had heard every word that I said
Or is it just an illusion in my head?
I don't know but the river understands me.
The journey of the great Indus is indeed long.
So I'll just sink down silently.

“I’ll be there in a minute.” I shouted as I heard my brother calling me out. The whole village was gathering around the grand fire that was lit near the whispering trees. Every year, on the eve of the ninth full moon, the whole village was gathered around the fire to share stories and sing the old folk songs. I never knew why but it always soothed my soul in a very bizarre way.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror. My eyes traced down my dark brown curls sitting on my shoulders down to the pendant of the snake that I was wearing.

My old nanny had gifted it to me this morning. “This was made when you were born, my little angel.” I brushed the fine bronze carving with my fingers. The details of the snake’s skin felt so real. The snake was curled up as if trying to hide in himself. “What’s the snake for, nanny?” I had asked her, flipping the pendant over. There was something about that little piece of jewelry that I could not take my eyes off it.“Do you know that a snake sheds off its skin as it grows a new one?” she had replied softly. “But they don’t just remove the old skin; they also remove the parasites along.”

Her words echoed in some distant part of my mind. “Snakes shed their skins.”

I stepped out under the open sky. The stars were all lined up as if waiting for my arrival. Everybody stopped chattering, even the great fire burning turned silent.

The old nanny broke the motion and moved towards me. “Come, my child”, she welcomed me with a smile. With that everyone lowered their gaze and bent down on their knees. The local women started singing the old folk song that I heard since I was a kid but only now the words made sense to me.

“It’s finally the time for the snake to shed its skin,
on this night, we all gather to welcome our new princess
to whom we vow to obey and please
who’ll rule the kingdom of the whispering trees.”

I was told to act like a lady and speak sugar coated words.
Cover my face in make up and look pretty for the world.

I was told to act like a lady and wear skirts not jeans.
Impress people around and make them all happy.

I was told to act like a lady and be polite to everyone.
Suffocate my own dreams and live like others.

I was told to act like a lady and keep my voice down.
Just pass smiles and not to laugh out loud.

I was told to act like a lady and be a lovable doll.
Let them play with me while I can't put up any walls.

I won't act like a lady and there's nothing you can do.
I'll be whoever I want to be, it's my kingdom to rule.

You were like the summer that kept me warm

And now I am knitting sweaters to feel you again.

They came like a nightmare and took us away.
Oh Mother! Don't spill a tear, your son's in a better place.
They were scared of our pens so they fired us off.
Oh Mother! Don't cry for their guns have lost.

They pointed us out and asked our identities.
Oh Father! Stand tall, I answered them proudly.
I took a bullet in my head for wearing green.
Oh Father! Be strong, I did not feel a thing.

So bury me in this land and bury me with smiles
Every grain of this soil is a witness of my sacrifice.
So bury me in this land and bury me with smiles
Your son embraced martyrdom and a martyr never dies.

Those monsters just killed, did not let anyone go.
Oh Father! Their hearts were stone cold.
They painted the walls of my school with our blood.
Oh Father! Don't worry, they will be the one to suffer.

I was received by the angels at the gates of heaven.
Oh Mother! That place was full of little children.
And when I met the Lord, I was dressed in green.
Oh Mother! My Mother! I was so happy.

So bury me in this land and bury me with smiles
Every grain of this soil is a witness of my sacrifice.
So bury me in this land and bury me with smiles
Your son embraced martyrdom and a martyr never dies.

On nights like these, I find myself wandering
like a drunk and lost person
to find love
in the abandoned streets and alleys.
With my heart ripped out and the taste of liquor
stinging on the tip of my lips
as I knock on the doors of strangers
hoping someone would take me in
just once
so the fear of being alone
can disappear from my mind.
Sometime around midnight
as I lay covered in the unknown sheets
a thought hits me from nowhere
like a meteor hitting hard.
What words will the winds carry around
about me in the town?
But I smile to myself to think
that the winds are no different from me.
Going places just to find
some place to feel
wanted.

Shining
Star
Our pride
Fought till last
With dreams in her eyes
That little soul tried to beat her heart
She suffered all the pain while the whole nation prayed for her life
People like Arfa, with extra ordinary talent, aren't born everyday. Achieving so many high goals in such a little age.
Everyone have to face it but like success she faced it very early
That innocent laughter faded away somewhere so deep
Making everyone broken and teary
Now she sleep
With her
Shattered
Dreams!

The caterpillar has just blossomed out of the cocoon
There's a whole world for it to explore, if you let it fly
She's just the same, fluttering her wings for the flight
Don't cut them off; she's s child not bride.

Too young to understand what's happening to her
She can see all her dreams crashing down in front of her eyes.
Let her play with dolls not kids of her own
Don't ****** away her childhood; she's a child not bride.

She's too scared to even speak up for herself.
As you're putting up her piggy bank of wishes up for a price
A flew jingling coins for you is the clanking of the chains for her.
Don't sell her off like this; she's a child not bride.

She just wants to escape from the nightmare but sadly
The mason jar is too hard to break down for the little butterfly.
She weeps now to turn back into the caterpillar she once was
for she just wants to be a child not bride.

He's silently floating in the river of unknown
Wondering which shore will be his home
He's not lost, rather he is himself the light
Like the first song of the dawn
that scares away the demons of the night.

A baby and a dead are both covered in a white sheet.
The struggle is to keep it spotless somewhere in between.

Desperate and drunk, I walked into a mosque for shelter
But the bearded men kicked me out from the stairs.
I got back on my feet and laughed as I asked God,
"Are you not mine and only theirs?"

The cup of coffee is still warm
With stains of red lipstick.
Drops of ink are still fresh,
Splattered on the pages
Of my diary which is now,
Just a reminder of the past.
Sometime past midnight it is,
Time for a new start.

The red drops of blood sat there on the white crystals, creating a master piece worth sharing in a museum.
The artist stood nearby holding the dagger that served as a paint brush to paint those beautiful strokes. And like every artist, he signed his art work but by his ****** fingerprints.
Her dead body was frozen underneath the layers of the snowfall that kept her warm.


He turned her into an undiscovered art.

Even the stars were burning with envy that night
as I tasted the heaven off your lips.
The fragments traveled down my throat
like wine; bitter yet sweet.
feeding the butterflies that were long dead.
The stars witnessed as we sealed off our bond
by stealing kisses before the sun could rise up again.

The wind sings me to sleep as I lay between the dancing lavenders.
"Oh child of the dawn, your kingdom awaits
as it watches the birds fly back everyday.
Oh child of the dawn, come back home
you're to be buried where you were born."
I clutch the white rose in my hand tightly, whispering like a scared child, " I am back, mother nature. I have returned back home."
The lavenders lean down and kiss me one by one, accepting me as one of them. I close my eyes floating like a feather with the wind to the wonderland.

The particles of wind still carries me around, every time it sings the lullaby of the dead.

He sat there in the dark waiting for the shadows to approach him as he smoked another cigarette. The tobacco on fire burned his lungs yet soothed his pain for a while. It turned his heart numb and cold.
He looked ahead as the first shadow came and touched his neck. The hair on his back stood up as he saw the shadow vanishing in front of his eyes. Then came another and another.
He witnessed the last glimpses of hope die before the cigarette could end.

I've trapped all those fluttering butterflies
in mason jars that are placed in my wardrobe.
They're locked so they can't fly anymore
For it's too cold for them outside now.

Little soldiers and heroes of this country
who proved to be braver than the rest.
They have set an example for the world to see.
They were the children dressed in green.

They fought the guns with their pens
and wrote their names on the land with their blood.
Those eyes are now closed that held a million dreams.
They were the children dressed in green.

Even the seven skies are scarred that witnessed
the innocent souls flying to the heaven.
They were smiling for they were finally free.
They were the children dressed in green

He asked me,
"Did you love anyone as much as you loved me?"

I whispered,
"Just your shadow and the memories."

I remember that fire burning in my bones
as you spit those words on my face
and turned your back on me.
My heart ripped out of my chest
and cursed you for turning into a monster
as I stood there trying to breath.
I still get goosebumps thinking of when
you leaned and whispered to my heart,
"Don't worry fool, you'll fall and get hurt again."

Since that day, I have wasted every second
trying to prove you wrong.
for this time I can't let you win.

The same tips of grass that use to kiss me
when we laid under the open sky
making wishes and dreams
now pinches me like needles
bursting all those little bubbles
of hope that I carry.

I have so many stories to tell to the world yet I have so little time. My whole life may be spent but it won't be enough for me to pour out the tales I have known.
Maybe if someday I die, you can come and sit by my grave and listen to all those untold tales.
Life or death cannot contain my words. I was born to spill words into this world and I will always do that. Always.

I've traveled the whole universe and what lies ahead just by looking into your eyes. They are dark but glittering with the secrets and wonders.
I've tasted the enchantment that sets a soul free as I kissed your lips and kept on kissing. You spilled all your spells as we exchanged our souls.
I've escaped my body and wandered in the land of the wanderers where you feed me with love that I had never known before.

Now I am lost, for I don't know my way back from the wonderland to the thorns where I once belonged.

He was the child kissed by the devil himself
whereas she was sent down from the heaven.
When combined, they extinguished the fire of the hell
and burned the wings of the angels.

The shadows of the hell called them saints
whereas in heaven they were known as sinners.

Last night before going to bed, I wrote my diary and wished upon every star in the sky to help me decide what to do.
Last night I had a dream and I swear the face that I saw was no one else but you.

She took her clothes off and stepped into the hot bath tub. The water when touched her skin, scrapped off the dust. The naked flesh of the wounds stung but the pain was sweet. For hours she tried to drown herself in the tub of her sins.
The water may have cleaned her but all those fragment oils could not remove his scent from her skin.

In the dark abandoned street of Swat
He stood there holding a wrecked doll
Nowhere in that familiar scenery
There was a place to call his home.

The shadows of the death surrounded him
There was no sight of a shooting star
Standing in the ruins of his own life
He whispered, "But why war?"

They say it will make the world better
They say it is for the sake of peace
With so much bloodshed and destruction?
Liars! It's all for their ****** greed!

Prejudice,
Power,
Pride.
I feel pity on humans
For such desires.

When I fell in love, I lost my identity. I forgot my name, I forgot myself. Every time I looked at the reflection in the mirror, I saw all those marks on my skin where you had kissed. They formed a map that can be traced easily back to a hidden treasure; you.
And that's how I kept you alive, even when you had died.

When I was a kid, I use to slide on the curve of the moon
and play hide and seek with the stars.
The moon got replaced by the empty bottles of wine
while the stars became the strangers in the back seat of my car.

I sat on the edge as the ship sailed through one of the deadliest oceans. I saw the waves dancing wildly with the wind while the sky was furiously crying.
He came and handed me a bottle of wine so I could get drunk till I lose myself. And I did as he sat with me, flirting around. He unstrapped all my weights and removed all the regrets making me realize what I had been missing all my life.
As the empty bottle rolled on the wooden floor, he took me away with him to an unknown yet peaceful place where I truly belonged.  


My lifeless body went down with the ship as I made love with death.

Tonight I am sitting around the fire that I lit
by burning all those poems I wrote for you.
And I swear it looks so beautiful as the flames
touch the stars just like I thought
my words would touch your heart.