At last when I fall asleep,
The last sound I hear
Is your breath
In my ear.
That sound is mine to keep.
Your secret, only known to me
That you are vulnerable in your dreams.
Bared for the world to see
Your heart sounds an irregular beat.
Terrified to fall
yet how I know that you would have it all.
And in your eyes I see the truth;
You know as well as I do.
And then as I close my eyes
And I hear your gentle sighs
I silently scream
"I love you"
But I do not dare to breathe.

**** this stupid game.
It's always the same.
We don't talk for a month or so, come back, and it's like you never left,
like you never changed.
You think I don't notice but I do.
I think about you every single day, religiously.
And I'm left wondering why it is you called in the first place.
Because you could just forget about me, leave me to live my own life
You could just let me forget about you, eventually I could, if I tried.
Instead you let me believe I've moved on from you and then suddenly
You.
You call.
Again.
I hear your voice.
It's like a signal
A signal to my heartstrings
Wait! don't let him go! they scream at me.
Please, he needs you! they plead with me.
I listen, because how can I ignore a cry for help?
I fall right back to where I was
I land on my face.
Who cares? Not you, not me.
****.
I love you, but you don't love me.
You should have just left me alone because now I'm back and this whole thing is just
****.
Here we go again.
This emotional coaster you've put me on
were you planning on letting me off?
Ever?

In the end, as I said:
I was waiting for the change.
If we were honest though, it was, as I say,
something of a game.
I started to wonder,
if maybe one day we would move
into a place where we could carry out our lives together,
and never let each other go.
We didn't do a big farewell number;
as I pulled away
he smiled and waved.
Memories, even your most precious ones,
fade.

I dreamed a dream that could never be true
and yet I still stayed up waiting for you
though why my heart held on to you
is something I will never know.

and though my heart cries out for things
I know will never be,
I still dream a hopeless dream
of us, of you and me.

If I could I'd probably
Try to see
if you wanted to accompany me,
to an innocent breakfast.
"I like my bagels toasted,
with thick cream cheese
in the middle please."
But to be honest,
I don't know that I wouldn't want more
than just an innocent breakfast sandwich.
"Also, can you add chocolate syrup
to that iced coffee? Strange, but it's how
I want it, please."
I'd look over my bagel
to see if you were enjoying your croissant,
and possibly try to
get you to sip my coffee.
All the while staring heavily at your lips;
All the while I would silently beg for you to
hold on to me like you do that French pastry.
All the while wishing you would look at me
the same way as my bagel & coffee
are looking at me now.
"One more thing,
could I get some napkins
and a straw please? Thank you."
But I know
It would never be
innocent breakfast
because I will always
want more.

I like you,
and I'm sorry,
but it's true;
so maybe we should jus forget about each other.
you wanna play around, and that's cool!
I ain't got a problem with a man who knows what he wants too.
I want to have fun but with you I feel like I could fall;
and that's the problem!
to have fun I shouldn't even like you at all!
It's way too complicated
it's way too hard
I've been down that road, and I can't do it again.
Not with you,
one more person I could lose.
and all because I can't control my heart,
all because when I looked at you
I knew, I just knew.
being away from you *****!
I feel like I need distractions to keep myself from talking to you.
maybe it's a cute guy who shows me interest
and we talk;
or maybe it's a guy with a girl and I can't help but make him go for a shot.
I mean who am I to convince him to come after me?
Just another ****.
Just another tease.
But lemme jus tell you, that it's all because I am tryna keep myself away from you.
From your smile
From your lips
From the way you touch my hips
God!
Do you have any idea what you do to me?
No.
I really don't think that you do.
I can't control how I feel, even though I'm trying.
It's almost like I'm tryna keep someone from dying.
I really would love if you could feel it too.
It would make things easier, and make me feel less blue.
That first kiss was the moment everything changed.
It's not that serious, I said, but it sure as hell is not the same.
Tried to play it off like it was just a game.
Tried to save myself from inner despair.
I don't want to have feelings, I just don't want to care.
I've become someone else, someone I never thought I'd be.
Yet you're the only one I really care who sees.
I'm hiding behind a wall because I'm so afraid to fall,
and at the same time I feel I've done nothing to prevent it at all.
I'm slowly letting down my guard, and with you,
it isn't that hard.
I should just leave you be, and let you forget about me.

Lets run away
We can go anywhere
To the stars and back!
You don't even have to love me
And the world will be ours
Nothing to distract
So lets run away
Because I know sometimes we need to escape
And we can ignore all those other pains
That keep us held down day to day
And I think we could conquer our fears
If we just stuck them out together,
Forever.
Lets run away
And I promise we'll make it
Without a scratch
Because I've got your back and you've got mine
Tomorrow is a gift in our hands
Who knew there'd be so much less time?
I want to run with you,
Because I know you're the only one who
understands that
sometimes this world is too
much for one to handle on their own
That's why I have you.
to keep the balance in my tilting life.
And I am not alone.
We only need each other and we can conquer the strife.
And as long as you want me to
I will love you
So follow me today,
Right now.
And we can run away.

Like the sound of a chorus
My cries
You can hear the sound of my sighs
Rise
As you grip my thighs
My chest falls right into you
I tried
But it was no use
This insatiable hunger
Like the tightening of a noose
My lust unbearably true
To say that I do
Not wish for your touch
Lies
It's the end of my life
Your eyes, they shine
When they look in mine.
I crave for your kisses
And this raging fire inside
Burns hotter than the sun
To say that I am done
With you
Untrue
This is it
Addicted to the high
Of my sweet, sweet
Demise.

she hurt you
and i just keep thinking
how dare she throw away what she had?
she had you
something i never did
and she dare be jealous of me,
because of what we used to be?
she had your heart
and i never did.
she tried to beg for you back after she realized her mistake.
how dare she believe it's that easy?
she doesn't deserve your love.
she left you
something i never did.
she claims she loves you but if she loved you
she wouldn't have lied to you.
she never loved you.
something i always did.
she closed herself from you
even though your arms were wide open
and i can't help but think
how dare she let you slip slowly away
because she could have had all of you
but she lost you
and i wish i could have held you
because i would never let you go
i would never hurt you
i would always love you
i would always cherish you
and i would have you, all of you
something she will regret
because she never could love you
the way i always will.

Call every day, because if you don’t tell me
Every single detail of your life,
You’re a liar and you don’t love me.
I want to know who you’re dating,
What ****** you off, why your brother is being
An annoying goofball, oh did I forget to mention?
If you don’t tell me when you’re going out
You don’t want to spend any time with me
And I take that offensively.
I need your opinion on everything,
Even if you have to be brutally honest
Because if I look fat I would wanna know
But don’t tell me I look fat because
It’ll hurt my feelings and I won’t let you forget it.
Hold grudges because when we get into fights
I want to bring up things from the past that I can use against you.
We’re supposed to love unconditionally, no judgment,
But I get to judge you because that’s what best friends do.
I need to make sure I’m right, most of the time.
You’re wrong. And I get the last word.
By the way, I need 30 minutes to an hour
of your day, every day, because if you don’t give it
you’re a bad best friend who won’t make time for me.
My boyfriend is equally as important as you
But sometimes he needs extra attention
So don’t get mad when I ditch you for him or anything.
Because if you do you’re a bad best friend for not
Letting me be happy.
You need to support me even if you don’t agree with me,
Love me when everyone hates me,
Oh, and did I say, You have to be beneath me,
because if you try to beat me, you’re too selfish for your own good.
So would you like to fill out an application?