You bought me sunflowers last Saturday
because you like the yellow orchestra we can
listen to, but you do not have to direct.
It plays a private concert only for you.
I play a few notes here and there too,
but nothing can compare to sunflowers.

I compare lots of things to
flowers,
like your eyes.
You do something to my insides
I cannot explain
in a metaphor to flowers.

You planted a gilded seed.
It grew faster than any ****;
more delicious than homemade irish mead.

Sun shining, birds chirping, children playing-
all of this-
sounds like life’s decaying
because you’re not next to me.

You make oxygen more than a box on the periodic table.

I’m not suggesting I’m unable
to perform tasks without you.
I’m used to ashes in my coffee cup.
Your presence seems to open up
cold sunflowers.
You set ablaze the sun’s powers.
I could go on like this for hours
about the love you built;
iridescent solid sunflowers

If you love me,
don't you ******* dare let me go.
Because I am worth the fight and I will be responsive.
If you love me, if you ever liked me, ever saw something there,
let's make something. plow a field with hard work and throw away mis-communications like stones
sow trust with tiny seeds and let it be. Let it grow.
But if you love me, listen.
Don't ******* throw me away

I am a coward
I dare not confess my heart
For fear of rejection
I don't wish to spoil the friendship we have

Declaring love
is more courageous than facing a hungry lion
I long to tell you so bad
Yet fear is holding me back
I hope someday, I can find my courage
Before, it is too late

Silence
is
Bad

Because
then
I
have
time
to
think
about
how
I
am
not
good
enough

About
how
I
am
unwanted

In
the
silence
is
when
my
thoughts
are
loudest
when
my
monsters
decide
to
come
out

And
with
silence
comes
violence

(a.d)

is it always going to be like this?

am i always going to feel so invisible? so unnoticeable?
it always comes back to you, doesn't it?
i wish it didn't, but it does.

your eyes, your smile, your laugh;
they're not meant for me, and they never were.
they're meant for her.

i spend so much time
trying to talk myself out of these feelings,
but  they  just  won't  go  away.

though when i really sit down and think about it,
about you  and  i together,
it frightens me, and i feel silly for imagining such things in the first place.

we wouldn't work,
i know we wouldn't.
but i still get this feeling sometimes...

this feeling that we would be great together,
better than you and her--but i know that's foolish.
and it's a thought i shouldn't even entertain.

and so i ask: is it always going to be like this?

Love has an embargo against me.
Forsaken, forgotten, forlorn--
My heart breaks for the sound of a lover’s sigh;
For the solemn pounding of a treasured heartbeat next to mine.

I'll never find sublime perfection
In the face of another;
The arcane whispers and smiles
Shared by soulmates are barred from my purview.

The divinity of a caress escapes me,
The sacred secret of a kiss refused me.
Love denies itself to me.

I stand alone,
Waiting for seafoam to tickle my toes.
Waiting for a love that will never be known.

They asked for drugs
and i showed them your smile