Crimson, a color I had become accustomed to seeing
not on clothes but on skin-
In many imperfectly man-made lines in which-
Brought a distasteful satisfaction of knowing-
I was in fact still alive
At the time it felt nice but now they are something-
I truly despise

When you finally think
Everything is finally getting back in place
It all just falls apart-
Faster than you expect it too
And then you have to restart
And then it happens again-
Its a vicious ******* cycle
And it will kick your ***
And it will tear you down
No matter how hard you try-
It happens again
And that-
Is the most-
I guess you would say-
Humiliating part of it

I feel as if I'm falling-
Into a deep dark pit
And it's never ending
I feel as if I'm drowning
Like I'm underwater
but instead of water-
It's depression
I'm surrounded by people-
But I'm still alone
I have a family that should care for me-
But instead they hate me
I pray to God yet-
I feel so helpless
I love others-
But they don't love me
I shouldn't care about their opinions-
But I care too much about them
I listen to depression and anxiety-
Because when I have no one there for me
They are there and they won't leave

You thought you had me
Wrapped around your finger-
You tried to control me-
Isolate me-
Use me-
Manipluate me-
You thought I would do everything for you-
You thought I couldn’t leave-
I have one question-
How well did that turn out?