is it new york i love
or do i crave being
near you; crave the
one in a million
chance that if we
were in the same city
we would run into
each other on the
sidewalk while i’m
on my way to buy
flowers and you’re
smoking a cigarette
dressed in all black
and i’d smile at you
and you’d grab me by
the wrists and scold
me for being away
for so long and then
i’d let you kiss my face
as you interlock your
fingers with mine and
you’d never let me go
again, you would
take me with you
wherever you went
and i’d never look back.

I would've given birth
To you,
Endured whatever
Mothers do.
Instead, I did
What Dads do.

I rocked you
Til my future shook;
Watched you til
I couldn't look.
As you changed,
I changed too,
To do the things
That Dads do.

You were bathed,
Dressed and fed;
I loved you so much
I was saved.

If there's credit,
Well, I get it,
For teaching you to read.
I took the blame
When you got bored
With school's ABC's.

I followed you
In all your roles,
Your teams,
Your solos,
Your trips,
Your shows.
First to clap,
Last to sit;
I taped it all,
From start -
To finish.

I taught you
How to tie a lace,
Ride a bike,
Golf and skate.
When time arrived
For you to drive,
You learned
On standard,
Never stranded,
You came home alive.

Your highs
I took in stride,
By example taught
Humility's pride.
Your lows,
I couldn't internalize,
I dropped my guard
With my eyes.

When Dad's do well
It's a double edge,
The future wedge.
The world
Revealed
Desired you too.
I don't dismiss
What mothers do,
But when Dads do well,
Both lose you.

Don't love me to love me.
Love me to never lose me.

Hold me to never watch me go
and kiss me to never say goodbye.

Keep me only yours
*and I will keep you only mine.

You tasted like peppermint,
Just the way I imagined how your kisses would be.

Refreshing,
With a tinge of sweet aftertaste,
It was pretty addictive too.

As I lean back in to your warm embrace,
Asking for another hug,
My eyelids involuntarily flutter open,
And the depressing realization hits me.

It was just a dream.

take me in and
   i'll take you out,
   i'll take you away
to a far, forgotten fantasy
   away from urban complexity, insanity.
we could
dive the depths.
climb the heights.
whisper our wishes
   to the evening breeze.
sing to the beat
   of bubbling brooks.
dance to the rhythm
   of rustling leaves.
ride the road
   of the winding river.
sail forth
   into the vast velvet ocean.
drink the moon glow
   that drips thick like milk.
swallow in
   the air's forgotten freedom.
with one hand
   reach for the stars
   that shine almost as bright as you.
with the other
   hold mine.

erase and escape.
rewrite reality.
lift up that heavy heart.
fall back in love with me.