I despise myself for not being someone you could love.

Don't stumble, forget to hide.
Don’t bring them down,
don’t make them cry.
Once they hear,
they’ll need reasons why.

I know you didn’t ask for this,
stop sounding so sad.
We said we love you,
you're not happy about that?

You just sit alone in here,
dwelling on silly fears;
no we won’t sit with you,
but it doesn’t mean we don’t care.

Sorry this burden is yours,
you can try and bleed it away;
but there is no escape,
this is how you were made.

There's no place to suffer,
no going away.
It's dark in here
all of my days.
No smiling lights,
no happy surprise.
Only this disguise,
of constant lies.
I know they bother them,
my sad eyes.
They can't bear to see,
they want me to hide.
Just stay empty inside,
so they won't feel down.
Still one by one,
they'll all turn around.
They won't ever stay,
or test their extent of pain.
They only obey
their impulse to stray far away.
They'll desert me to ache
in this dark hole they can’t take,
where I get no relief
not even in sleep.
So I guess save yourself
I’ll taint that light you keep.
I'll burden your soul,
til you can't take anymore.
Then I'll drain you dry
before I kiss you goodbye.
And you'll never know
when it's all done,
I'll still be empty
but you'll be gone.

At least say something.
Please don't leave without saying anything,
It causes me pain that you won't have to witness.
But it makes me wonder,
Did I do something wrong?