Maybe
I was too scared
that you'd become
the metaphors.

Time has turned,
turned to death.
I am lost
without a breath.
The thoughts I had
began to disappear,
when I looked out,
everything was unclear.
When the world started to fade
everything I saw
made me afraid.
I began to ask questions,
in search for confessions.
When nothing came out,
I began to have doubt.
The moment my heart stopped,
my body just dropped.
Now I stare out to the sea,
and know my soul is free.

-r.s

some nights i want to disappear
into the white sheets of a bed
that no longer remembers the scents
of lovers with hurried breaths
and trembling fingertips

other nights i lay awake
looking out of the frosted glass
into the world i'm supposed to be a part of
and i remember what you said to me
that night before you left.

"you're so detached from everything"

i realize now that you loved me
wholeheartedly.
but it was me that was like a broken clock
constantly ticking away at seconds
that had passed eons ago.
i was always the girl that lived
in her fading memories
and i didn't realize how deep
in my own head i was
until the door slammed shut
in your wake.

i realize now that you can't
really love someone
as much as you can miss them.
i'm a shell of the girl you once knew
and i don't blame you for leaving
because if i were in your shoes,
i too, would leave the girl
with hollow eyes
and whispering poetry.

there is no beauty in pain.
i know that now.