Heart shaped lips.
He likes to call it bliss.
But all I feel is a
mind screaming to be freed.
Teacup sized ****,
You can't get enough of this.
But all I want
Is my oversized, palpitating heart
to be held by something other than
cold, ungrateful hands.
Nice shaped legs.
You salivate at the sight of them.
But all I want is to walk this Earth
not afraid to be who I really am.

Every inch of my body
is beautiful.
I know, I know.
I'm beautiful.
But what about the soul?
What about the love that
flows through my veins?
What do you make of this?

8/16/16

Soon I will be gone from here.
And no one will find me.

Maybe forever is just a
Hyperbole.
Used in times
Of despair..
& I’m starting to realize
That even something
As concrete as family
Ebbs with the tide
Until there is nothing more
than traces of blood
And distant memories.

And even they
Who once made
Promises of tomorrow's fertility
Have gone into gallows of darkness.
So why should I stay?
Who is to keep me?
Not promises of infinity.
Not the blood of relatives.
Just me and my
Broken heart.
To roam this earth.
Til death do us part.

3/15/16

Then you said something about
how this shouldn’t
couldn’t happen again

picking your shorts
off the floor
squirming your legs into them

like milky straws

me in bed
your reflection in the mirror
one hand in your hair

strands hurled
back and forth
as if throwing last night

out of your head

red streams in your eyes
stains on the table
and I’m static but inside

all over the place

You get lost in your own mind sometimes
just trying to find yourself
locked inside of a prison where the bars
are made out of your fears
the guards are negative connotations
and the warden is your own inflated ego
You dare not go beyond the walls of self-doubt
without proactive reconnaissance
but you can’t help feeling that freedom lies
just beyond your insecurities

Lungs flatten out
Like burnt pancakes.
And the fault of that is;
I'm not made of glass.
And no one
Knows I'm suffocating.

3/11/16

I can see you through this heavenly body
Eternal static to me
is death and life to you
A spec of light
An ocean with depths completely untouched by human skin
My heart beats with anticipation
Sweat beading and tear falling
Hands shaking and thoughts racing
I'd tell you I'm sorry
I'd tell you I didn't know my strength
I'd beg for forgiveness for
exploiting your weaknesses
like a glass bottle broken into a children's sandpit, like a design so flawed
You lived with it.
I can't live with this.

Always telling others
To trust their instincts.
But when it's my turn
My spine turns to rubber.
And love over powers.
And I cant show my face
Anymore.
I can't let them see
That softness
Has replaced my rage.
And I am weak again.

3/10/16