If you were a poem
I could write you easily
If you were a poem
I would not have nightmares about you
If you were a poem
I would not be sweating
If you were a poem
I would not be fretting
If you were a poem
I would not have rough draft after rough draft
piling up at my feet
If you were a poem
I could finally get some good sleep
If you were a poem
I could keep my sanity within reach
I could lie lazily at a beach, if only in my imagination
If you were a poem
The problem is that you are not a poem
If only you were a poem instead of  being an
Essay

What if I never said I love you
Where would we be?
Would you be with someone different
Would you even love me
What if that day I did let you go
Would you have came back
Would you say you couldn't live without me
What if I left you
How would you react
Would you tell me to stay
What if we never met
How happy would you be
What if that break I took lasted more then three days
How long would you have waited
What if I never said I like you
Where would you be
Would you still be with him
Would you have ever admitted your feelings for me
What if I chose her over you
Where would I be
What if we never met
How happy with you be
What if I never said I love you

I never thought being loved would hurt so bad.
Like a thousand knives stabbing my bleeding heart.
For every lie I speak.
As the fear of being alone slowly suffocates my dying heart.
I see the cold monster I've become.

Tears brimming right through your eyes,
Trickled down on your pale face
Standing still right by your side,
I wish I could ease the pain

I spent my nights reading books in our greatest libraries
Searching for what it is I am still clinging on to,
Then after the final vowel I realised
The one thing I miss about you, is you.

no sound without silence
no peace without love
you must have your highs and lows
there is nothing so maddening as a flat line
to know your own composure within yourself,
you must throw yourself into different activities
only then can your soul remain whole
while the ocean around you is flat, you run the risk
of running over, of blending into the surroundings
force makes you solid and shows you who you are
inactivity, boredom, wears away and erodes at your good character
if you don't use it, you lose it.

Every day I loose a bit of my soul when I hear the things said about me
And everyday I try to mourn for my loss, but end up loosing my humanity

Left on my feet
Only to fall
Victim and finally
Enter in my heart

I** wish I wasn't
So fake

For we both call
And finally realize;
Know our mistakes
Even if we can’t handle pain

A distant look in her eyes,
Stretching beyond the horizon.
A battle long fought,
In her dreams so surreal.
A thousand miles did she walk,
Before pausing to rest.
But the lights began to fade,
For it was time for her sunset.