Every new dawn draws more and more away from my failing ***** of love.
Memories slowly slip into oblivion
The harder and stronger  I attempt to hold them, the faster they slide through my fingers
The small bits of hope that I cling to, the little moments of love, the romance the feeling of being wanted
I cherish them, but as the time begins to wear at my heart, like a rust
Slowly covering every surface inch until completely black
They are washed away, taken from me as I sleep
Robbed of any happiness that was once held by them
Replaced with emptiness
Void of emotion
Void of hope
Void of dreams
Leaving a feeling of being vandalized
My most sacred thoughts stolen by the evilness of solitude
Solitude who starts as a friend and begins to taint the mind
Eventually corrupting the soul
Left only with hopelessness and anger
Frustration and fear
To wonder and ponder the reason of living on
Taking the tiny bits of joy and turning them to horror
Pain that swallows us whole and takes the breathe right out of our lungs
Desolate and lost in the vast desert of humanity
My face begins to disappear into the nothingness of the crowd
Nothing to separate this tortured soul from the next
Estranged from love or any resemblance of it
Withdrawn from society
Falling deeper into the abyss of her loneliness
So close to the point of no return

We meet here
At our final passing
Love me
Or
Love me
Not

Two strange jump but collided in the same way
Months and years of for keeps
The memory of having each other
Seem like everything will be okay.

Intertwined destinies in the paths of ecstasy where regrets and tragedies have no place indefinitely
Tears in pairs in joy and sorrow
fears impaired in fogs of hollow despairs as loved is shared in the friendship declared

Crazy, silly, happy and all extreme feelings
Stepping together in the sane destined path from the universe
Oath of having each other's back
And their galaxies explode into a beautiful disaster

Enveloped with pine-
Stretched across statelines:
Beauteous blue upon envious emerald
Pooled amongst royal white mountains
Adorned with grey jewels of centuries
Emitting sweet, earthy aroma
She caresses the land.
Mother to lakes hidden by her red fir,
Provider to the fiery yellow cress
Hydrant for all animals alike.
M(ama) Rose keeps a chary eye
on her joint creation:
The provider, the mother,
The revered, grandiose puddle
is threatened by scarcity.
The royal white mountains,
Remain royal- but lack frost,
And thus the water retreats
Shriveling back 13 feet from shoreline
This once sacrosanct lake---
Devastated.


Keep Tahoe Blue?
Keep Tahoe Wet.

Playing tag with your shadow
Waiting for just the right moment to pounce
The light and night begin to play tricks on my ****** eyes
Twisting and turning between darkness and sunlight
Slinking and slithering around my feet teasing my senses
Floating through the room inside my soul
So easily, so gracefully, so quickly
Never staying in one corner for too long
I turn my head and you are gone.

One moment you seem larger than life
The next you are nothing put a speck of dust
As I slowly begin to believe the hallucination I see is real
Shape distorts and you have become an unrecognizable monster
I get so close but can't hold on
You slip through my skin like a spirit
Taking all the life breath as you pass through my hollow shell of a body.

Longing for convulsions and cacophony
The brain desires outlet-
Outlet for the hopelessness of mortality
Against knowledge of disappearance amongst you
And the ultimate disappearancs of one self
Which keeps you voiceless- a prisoner to your dying flesh
Without an outlet for the hopelessness of mortality
And thus hopelessness of mortality becomes an outlet of the captivated mind

curled up in a corner
of a room you will find me
bent
but not broken and spent
but not spoken with spokes of the bicycle
wheel that broke off and
rolled through the liberation
gate staking
my face-plates,
now, folks,
I have warned you
I am horned and with virtue,
alone but not lonely
I'm a circus clown's pony with
plots of freak mutiny,
a ship-wrecked bronze bust of political impunity
I am star-gazing through blazes of thin paper, puny
little pinners pressed tightly by blazer pocket roomies.
I'm a goonie, a goblin and a masked, hooded robin robbing rich people's goblets of every droplet
and although I move slow I will not
ever stop it
so I sew
on the buttons after I do the popping while Millers mill about
doing holiday shopping
how sloppy
our rituals all empty and flopping
about in the wind like a limp rubber topping for
bottles of formulas filled up with tube-fed
federally-regulated hormonally-muted
undead
living piglets with noses as red as
our shred
of human dignity left after all that
we've spent.
I'm the leftovers left under every park bench.
I'm a snarling, glad monster with the truest intent
for every breath
to be free.
like my fangs and my
fur all curled up in a
corner of a room you'll find me.

Amidst  a lush farm of green as far as the eye can see
Is a barren plot of soil that is as dead as dead can be

No plant will take seed there
No fertile soil to produce or replicate
Dry patch of earth, so unwanted
Such an eye soar to the surrounding farms

Void of all nutrients
Void of life giving springs
Dust and brown decay fill the air
No harvest will exist there
How sad that the reason for its existence does not apply
How sad no farmer will take the time to tend her, care for her
Time to turn over the soil until life is reborn far beneath the surface.

Dancing doodle bug gliding across this blank sheet of trees
Up and down
Sideways and front ways and back ways
Only visible to me
Shapes morph into people
Dots that join together to form the endless chain of imagination
Monotonous Motion
A reflex to mindless flow of thought
Sound folds into one continuous stroke across the universe
My brain has drifted into an endless abyss of creativity
Any possibility can occur
Ordinary is no longer reality
Every movement bends light to energy
Every drop of ink comes to life
Animates the simple structures into
Complex creations
Infinite possibility of white
Every vision, every dream develops into
the life gifted to the page

Its a pain that I'm unable to explain.
Physical yet emotional all in the same way.
To the outside world its invisable and non-existent
But inside there is a stabbing, gut wrenching pain.
A blade being ****** through my abdomen over and over again.
Until nausea over comes and chokes me close to drowning
The very organs that make me a woman are poisoning my blood, my life force
Every emotion is magnified, intensified
made into a life ending dilema
Every nerve throbbing, transferring through every part
Making my legs weak and my heart race
The blood running through my veins has become acid
Alone in this prison of emotional and physical hell
No tender hand to caress my cheek
No soothing, comforting words to lul me to sleep
No strong arms to wrap me up tight
No soft lips to kiss me goodnight
The darkness of solitude is seeping in
To encompass and destroy any small bit of hope left
Fate has cursed my every move
Tarnished every hello, expecting and waiting for the goodbye
Destined to wallow for all eternity in my own tears

Forbidden fruit hung on the tree in such a fashion that I could not grab it.
I watched the forest fever grow hot near you. Untastable, you hung just so.
Just so.
High on the branch but low to the ground, like an earthbound deity, you swung humbly.
I watched you.
Three thousand happenstances, coordinating dizzily, dropped you in my lap.
How could I not lap you up?
You tasted me
on your way down.
Sifting through me filtered, your poison seeps out my pores.
Last week of ripeness go slow,
I cannot get the taste off my tongue

Moldriss studies the woman opposite,
He wants to lay his head in her lap and
Sniff her femininity, sense any sweetness
Of virginity. He can picture his head there

Lying without motion, closing the eyes,
Warming into her thighs. She sits up
And stares out of the window; her blonde
Haired head turning away, her hands

Folding in her lap. Maybe those hands
Could finger his ears as he lay in her lap,
Could lean her lips to his cheek and kiss.
He wants always to remember her there,

Her lap so inviting, just waiting there, her
Hands resting like small guards to her palace
Of joy and birth. She turns forward and
Looks at him, her eyes a pale blue, her lips

Parted slightly, her hand lifts to brush hair
From her eyes, and he wanting to lay his
Head in her lap, on thighs, imagining *******
Her nightly. She looks away shyly, watching

Trees and fields passing by the train window;
Maybe she senses his head in her lap, his
Nose sniffing out her femininity like some pig
Sniffing for truffles, his eyes closing, his ear

Waiting to be fingered by her small hand,
And he just laying there in his dream like
Some sad prophet in a once promised land.

Illiterally
The letter 'A'
Is type O Positive

and wraps 'round my ankle
at midday.

So many words for
Me.
So few for them.

I,
like a chimney
Send fire from base up
Higher to the place
Where the ashes erupt

in the sky.

I stain my
Insides.

He like a soldier stands
Tall and unphased.

Window print silhouette.

It vibrates, my gaze,
Sends moonbeams through space

and somehow I reach him.

Refresh the haze.
Danger is as dangerous,
Only dangerous as
the place.