In the silence of the dark
When sense is close to sleeping
I can feel your arms around me
I can feel you breathing
In my dreams where i can love you
In the bright of day
In my dreams where you are not
Two thousand miles away

In the light where I can finally breathe without your name
In the noises of the crowd where there is no more pain
I'll recall the wavelength of the silence that you kept
I'll set fire to that broken bed where we once slept

every time you drink the sea
i am left on an island
and i walk for miles to find the shore
and when i look up to see the sky
you swallow it whole
and i walk for miles to find the horizon
and when i look to the stars
you eat them, one by one
and i walk for miles to find the moon
and when i feel the tides begin to turn
you drink the sea
and i am left on a island
and i walk for miles to find the shore

and when i look up to see the sky...



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ef0uZPNltE

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art—
    Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night
And watching, with eternal lids apart,
    Like nature's patient, sleepless Eremite,
The moving waters at their priestlike task
    Of pure ablution round earth's human shores,
Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask
    Of snow upon the mountains and the moors—
No—yet still steadfast, still unchangeable,
    Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast,
To feel for ever its soft fall and swell,
    Awake for ever in a sweet unrest,
Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath,
And so live ever—or else swoon to death.

Tall yellow and white daisy’s sway
Around my American post box

The dust moves from town to town
As the desert wind blows in

I hear the unmistakable engine sound
As he comes into view

All I crave is he carries a letter
From you

Yesterday I heard the piano play
notes in my head
black and white keys
in symphony
so sweet

I heard its pure sound
hit every string
as thin as my patience
within

I heard the do's and re's
dance with the mi's
as smoothly as my mental state

I felt the reprimanding
low keys howl in awakening calls
to wake me from my drunken trance

I embraced the light hearted
high keys, as they showed me
the bright side of things
the innocence of it all

I heard a piano yesterday
play from afar, calling me
telling me, let go of everything
and listen....
just music to melt the silence away

My brain, lulled into its symphonies
I forgot that beauty is not only skin deep
I forgot that even with eyes closed
and no scenario,
you can feel beauty

I heard a piano the other day
play a harmony
just for me
about
me

A conversation with myself mocks me!
I'm my own worst enemy,
a judgemental terrorist...
This I'm afraid even duct tape won't fix,
and that **** could float a boat.

filled with chemicals
and
they like to call it
clinical
trials.

Peeled away
they make me
kneel to pray
to
some lesser god
as if I failed some test

and where's the greater good?

I become (eventually)
acclimatised to this
brutality,
de-sensitised and
all morality
flees.

Who is culpable?

This photograph,
a memory
makes me laugh or cry,

but a memory indeed
indexed will feed
my thoughts.

Do not stand on my grave and cry
I am not there, i dont sleep
I dont eat
I am a thousands word that blow through the wind
I am a diamond that shine on snow
I am the sunlight that give you light
I am the gentle autumn rain that give you water,
When you awaken in the mornin'g darling hush
I am the swift upon your skin
I am the quiet birds that chant in your head
Do not stand on my grave and cry
Be happy.

You've been here before.  You woke up today and realized that the stress, the angst, and the foreboding that you've allowed to rule your life is there by choice.  You've gotten lost in the spiral of anxiety, again.

If it's not your health, it's your money.  If it's not the money, it's your kids.  If it's not your kids, you're worried about past life choices and how they will affect you tomorrow.  Your fears line up at the door, wrap around the block, and await their turn.  Your door is open to them all and you don't deny them.  You let them in.  

Once they are inside, you wrap your fears around you.  They’re a welcome smothering; a wearying security blanket of trembling phobia.  They are as familiar to you as they are distressing.  These constant, restless, companions are more comfortable than the unknown.  

Today, though, you stare at the line of fears and realize that something is missing.  Happiness.  Contentment.  Acceptance.  These are conspicuous in their absence.  And you remember an old Cherokee tale.  You have two wolves engaged in eternal battle inside you; one is fear and anxiety and the other is peace and serenity.  The strongest is the one you feed and you've been feeding the wrong wolf.  

You've done this your entire life in a self-centered, selfish, guilt-ridden, indulgent, fashion.  You wallow in the darkness because you're afraid you don't deserve the light.

You know you’ll feed the right wolf today.  But can you do it tomorrow?  

  mighty river;
the fish navigates
​as it will