My favorite time of day is the morning before the cigarette smoke laces through my hair. Theres something so pure and innocent about the morning and the sunshine and the smell of youth. I remember when lollipop sticks stuck out of mouth and my mother would yell that I would rot out my teeth. It's funny really, now the cigarettes hang out of my mouth like candy. Innocence is so pure the way it feeds through your body till some other drug is then the innocence is lost. And that's the beginning and the end to all our problems. We lost our innocence trying to **** the pain and when I say **** the pain I really mean **** ourselves. Because no body at 15 wants to down a bottle of pills just to make it through the day then at 16 drink more liquor than water then at 17 attempt to take your life because it might actually make you ******* feel something. I tried for so long to just ******* feel something like the way I felt heartache and pain and loneliness course through my veins. I tried to ignore it, black it out, I ******* tried. I think I love the mornings the most because the way the have so much potential but still seem to come to a ******* end. They know how to end. I am still learning.

you are my cup of tea
in a world full of coffee stains

We all exist in this world
Wouldn't it be nice to spend our time
With more memories,
More love,
More life,
Wouldn't it be nice to just live a little more?

You are a flower
That constantly sways in the wind
Petals scattered from shore to shore
While I,
I am a seed
Buried deep within the cold soil
Who hasn't been watered in days
I am the seed who has not yet began to grow
But instead, fades away

I never wanted to.
I didn't say yes,
In fact you never even asked.
Did you think this would ever affect me?
Did you think that one day I'd be too ****** up for anyone to ever want me again
Did come to mind that one day I wouldn't be able to get out of bed.
That one day, I'd cry broken sobs into my pillow just to feel.
That ever since I've been trying to forget, trying to fill the void
The void that you ripped into my chest.
You made nothing feel good, you broke the last living part of my body
But I think now, I'm finally whole
Whole and alone.
The way you wanted it.