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417 · Aug 2018
In the Middle
Carlos Torres Aug 2018
I listen to Blue when I’m with you
I listen to O’s shudder when you are gone
And share a hope of warmth when I dream,
Of course, of you

I see Red in our house today
Do the Devil’s tears fade my eyes?
Running until there is nothing?
I see but do not recognize you

I can hear, I can see, but where are you?
I have taste, touch, smell, all of it!
But I am in bed with a stranger
I know all of you, or nothing
Another original. Inspired by music, as are most things in my life. If you know any good tunes, shoot them my way. Thank you for reading!
Carlos Torres Jan 2019
You stopped calling months ago
We were still together, but you didn’t call
That hurt more with each passing day

It hurt to see you smile less with me
I tried grinning for the two of us,
But first I had to wade through my tears

It hurt to hear you lie to me
It was infuriating to listen to you,
Because you felt sorry for me

It hurt to wait for the end with you,
Like two people at a train station
Waiting for your next love to pick you up

It hurts that I’ll never hold you again,
And you’ll never call my name and smile
Not like you used to

You never even said good-bye
The last thing I saw were tears,
And you walking away
Some scars never heal, even if you give them love and attention. It' s hard to cope with all this silence around me.
308 · Aug 2018
They Tear Me Apart
Carlos Torres Aug 2018
The pop of a fresh handle, like hands placed on a rusted but polished railing
Overlooking a foreign harbor, I wish it would rain
But all it ever does is hail, like the echoing “knock” of a nail being hammered in
A subtle reminder, resembling their howls

I wish the silver I wore at my neck tired their mouths, those critics that read my life’s work
But “Never Write!”
Familiar taunts, I watch as they stare into mirrors with grins
Ignoring our pleas? Abuse is nothing new to the youth

Old scars wrapped in bitter bandages weigh in on my head’s case, I see tilted
But as long as I can get to the pier, I “shouldn’t” worry
Regardless, rain or shine, it gets exhausting having to check
Regularly, and often I ask if it is worth it, especially when it is
Hello, this is my first poem on this site. It is an old original by me, but the formatting is not agreeing with this template size. I'll write poems that fit well with the format in the future, but for now please accept some lines pouring over. Thank you!
306 · Aug 2018
Thinking, Thinking
Carlos Torres Aug 2018
Clockwork
Just a taste, then the image fades
Now more than ever,
I want to wake next to a stranger

Clockwork
I know you ache, I know,
I’ll make your pain disappear
Like a bandit, like a devil

Clockwork
There you go, just a taste
I savor every bite, I do
Clockwork
Quick, spontaneous original. Just something that's been on my mind. Goodnight.
289 · Sep 2018
Why Are We Not Closer?
Carlos Torres Sep 2018
Isn’t it funny that we can breathe the same air even when we’re so far away?
Maybe that’s why it feels like you’re inches from me.
And I knew you the least when you were closer than ever.
Why do you have to be so far for me to fully understand you, as you are?

When I make love with her I close my eyes and think of you.
We could be young forever, and maybe that’s why I’ll remember your body.
Does it even matter that you’ve let go of me?
We’ve let go before.

But maybe I’ll stop dreaming of us, day trip with another in my arms, and be happy.
Maybe you don’t love me, or maybe you do. It doesn’t matter.
We’ll meet again.
And when we do, will it be different?
This is an old one I decided to share, that's why some lines may spill over. I'm sorry. I just feel related to this piece tonight and want to post it. I hope some of you can relate, or maybe I hope you won't. Sweet dreams...
-C.T.
284 · Sep 2018
Shell Tops and Polo
Carlos Torres Sep 2018
Remember when we had nothing?
Remember when all I had was you?
Remember how I used to scrape in the keys,
Just to hear the engine fall flat?
Of course you don’t
You were chasing finer linens
I was chasing more dividends,
For us

Remember how I used to scream blood?
Remember when you turned blue?
You turned blue and looked at my cuts,
Then looked away as I turned white
I remember the cracked mirror
The cracked mirror that showed the real me
You looked at me and saw The Devil
I accepted my scorched skin long before you wouldn't

Lucifer fought for his people,
Even as he fell from grace
And now I live in the hell I created,
Happy
Learn what to let go of, and find something to hold onto. Never give up. Never.
169 · Jun 2019
Late Night Thoughts
Carlos Torres Jun 2019
It ****** me off you won't talk to me
Like I'm the worst person you've ever met

Out of everyone who doesn't acknowledge me
Your neglect cuts the deepest

I thought we cherished the same memories
Memories it seems you've already forgotten

You must be incredibly lucky to have a mind so protective,
Or maybe you're simply cruel and I never noticed

You treated me like none other
The love you gifted me healed a few bitter scars from my skin

Now the new cuts I have look so familiar,
But they're not the same

The pain I wince at is signed with your name
Another frame to hang in the notorious hall of fame

Every so often I pass by to reminisce
Since old love can be humorous at times, in a way

But your image disappoints me
As if the trust we built was made of wet sand, in your eyes

Your eyes, the ones I fell deeply entranced in,
The same ones you deemed ordinary, I proposed as incomparable

But now they don't even see me,
Paired with ears that refuse to hear my cries

So I whisper to myself
Words I wished I could tell you

Maybe one day you'll listen
And on that day I hope I'll be willing to talk

Goodnight, Natalie
I'll miss you
It's been awhile, but I'm sad

— The End —