O' bitter timber
Set there--his limber
And blighted eyes.
Thou old timer
Belched in ember,
Set to keep my eyes.
Midst shallow December
And falling November
come forth your rise
of notorious power
In the last man's hour
his splinters shall rise

it's at times like these
that i'm completely convinced
that you're my answer

it was then that i saw you were gone
that i let you slip through my fingers like sand
and that same sand collected at the bottom of the hour glass
i became mesmerized
obsessed
when would the glass be filled with the gritty substance so i can flip you over
and we can go back to square one
like the strangers we are
and the sand keeps dripping until you come again
because i can pretend that i know you
and that our souls are somehow synced up
but when it's all said and done
and i lie alone on a Friday night
wondering why you haven't materialized in front of my eyes
i know there will be no more visits by my ruin
my ruin
the one who can do no wrong in my eyes
but will leave me with bumps and bruises and aches
my ruin
who left one day and never came back
whose presence was not felt in four months
until now
i haven't felt you calling
since September
something is reaching out to me
calling you to my attention
you need me
or you want to believe you do

We cannot
rush our healing.
This life is a journey,
and darkness
always
holds
a teaching.
Love is the light
at the end
of the tunnel.
She is there.
She is waiting.
She is never leaving.

Life is such a scary thing
Oh, to simply think...
I was happy once

A braced smile
And clumped mascara
With positivity and self confidence
I was happy then

I loved myself
And I was determined in all I did
Refusing to let anyone down
I was happy then

A fake smile
With no makeup and no self-esteem
Seeing no point in trying to hide my ugly face
I wish I was happy again

I hate myself
And I can't do anything right
All I do is let people down
I wish I was happy again

Death is not such a scary thing
But then I met him...
I think I might be happy now