Exhausted yet I carry on, boots grind with each heavy step I take. I trudge through bones of fallen men, whose hearts I had to break.

Wings that used to carry me, now lay as a reminder on my back. Haunted by the ghosts of lovers, who once counted all I lack.

The wind whispers names of honorable men, who survived yet I left broken. Names not worthy of my poisoned lips, that have parted but not since spoken.

Beautiful in reflection, but color fails to hide. This heart of frost that beats within, that so long ago shattered inside.

They stand in line and follow me, yet I tell them with regret from the start. If this was a fairytale, I'd be that twisted witch without a heart.

you gave your heart, you gave your soul
all in the name of rock and roll
you sang of the pain that we all know
so many people hate to see you go

still growing are the seeds you sowed
a life lived fast, a song played slow
your tortured soul wasn't just for show
you'll live on, in my radio

Stepping in the middle of a hurricane fire waiting for the winter to blow
Somebody was listening but you were on your way to Mexico
Down there, they won't care if you want to run around town
The women don't love you but the one you do sleeps in a Minnesota town

Can you see the horizon falling like a diamond in the middle of the violet sky?
You thought you were clear until a tear came to your eye
Everything was moving along and you had your pride in your hand
Now you've got a decision, do you run or fight like a man?

Somewhere in the city where everything was pretty, you found the windowpane
You saw her silhouette burning like a jet through the campfire rain
You shouted out and saw her open up the window to her moonlit room
As a man grabbed her waist, froze you in place, now you've gotta move on too

I think it about now
It doesn't matter if I'm just wondering
If I'm feeling down
They've heard it all before
I'm coming out again
And the sky's been thundering
If I can feel the rain
I don't want it anymore

So what if I am?
So what if she's so beautiful
She'll never really be
As beautiful as you
Do you really think,
That anyone's as beautiful,
When I tell you my head,
Doesn't believe that it's true?

Sitting next to her, watching falling a sleep...
I didn't look at anything except the loose strand of her hair...
I didn't notice anything except that loose strand of her covering her eye!...
I saw how her eye so tired and wants to rest...
I can't tolerate sitting next to her!
I sat on the sand looking at the sea, in that dark night!
10 minutes....
Me, the sea, the moon, the wind and she still sleeping on that rock!
looking at her again, how she leaning toward her knees and laying her head! and Sleeping like a child!
I kept chatting with the Sea! What else!
What should I do!
I feel the whole world inside me and I can't give her anything except the friendship that I promised her...
She Knows i'm lying! And I know she knows i'm lying!
                              The question that I can't find any answer to it!
I love her.... The Hell Yes I do!
The sound of waves asking me with anger, are you serious!
My answer, is there something else i'm going to lose!
                                      You are Hurt!
I'll be more hurt if I waste this feeling...
                                       You are Lost!
Divine with me...
                                        You will be in silent!
But I'm fully alive...
                                         You will be alone!
But I'm in love...
                                        Why can't you see!

Because she still sleeping...
I saw the child inside her that I'm missing! and all that...
                                       While she is sleeping!

I might be a stranger and I was called that…
I might be a freak, and I was called that…
I might be abnormal, and I was called that…

All over those years, I was collecting labels to my  collection! and nothing new!

I was searching all those years to relax, for peace and for meaning in every breath I’m taking from this life!

According to Human’s terms and law….
I fall in love….
I got married….
I had children…
I got divorced…

And I was still searching…..Then….

I found her… and all terms and laws changed!

everything…
Turned upside down…
Chaos became the theme…
Logic became the stranger in my world…



Even when I lose, I win….
I lost my centre… I win my heart!
I lost my sense… I win my meaning!
I lost my logic…. I win the purpose!
I am broken…. But I was reborn…

                            Here I am….
Not Sad….
With my new skin and heart!
Ready for the unexpected failure and win are the same for me! I will learn from each opportunity they will bring to me.
On Alert of that moment to…..
                              Leap!

Is it a thought, it can be!
Is it a hope, no harm to consider!
Is it around Love, let us find out!
Is it a confusion, slightly!

I know one thing…… A lot of whispers inside every corner in me!

Am I getting angry…. absolutely!
Am I reaching beyond the stretch of my patience…Definitely!
Am I touching the ceiling of losing my faith… Obviously…


I can survive out of pain!
I can move on with the hurt!
I can tolerate wounds outside and inside me!

But
I can’t survive Lost!
I can’t tolerate wasted feelings!
I can’t let my reborn heart down!

I just want….
To shut up all those  voices and talks inside me!
I don’t know who is talking to me…..
Is it myself…
Is it my heart…
Is it my brain…
is it my soul…
is it The God…
Are they the angles…
Are they Heave’s blesses…

I don’t know where they are coming from…
I know they are taking me to places, where I can’t rest…
I don’t know their structure…
I know they go deep in every breath I’m inhaling and not going out…dwelling and going in circle all over me!
I don’t know why they wan to talk to me!
I know there is a message…

What the message is!….
I woke up feeling i’m  becoming a Hell-boy doomed ages ago!
Other days, i feel i’m the Grey Wolf, protecting my territories ..


I don’t want to reach “Beware the levelheaded person if they’re angry.”….
I don’t want to reach the cry that who are in Heaven and Earth can’t understand…

I just want…
Sleep with her…. Not the way you are thinking…
Smell her… Also not the way you are thinking…
Looking to her eyes before i close my eyes and sleep in peace…

that is a dream, a wish, a hope, that won’t come true…
and that what makes it more…..
Outrageous!                                      

I might…
Not open my eyes after that and die in peace…
Leave the world behind me and go far away…
Lose the faith in something called love…

At least…
Finally i slept in peace!
A peace not defined by human and defined only by my…
Heart and Love!

Does love exist!
                                  Is it a fancy....
                   Is it only found in mythology!

                                    With her.....
                                       Love
         Like the kiss between Arwen and Aragon

                                    With her.....
                                       People
         Labeled me the lover.....However I'm in reality
                                    I'm a friend!
                              What is my crime!

Your words showered me with Love!
Your words gave me the warmth inside my soul!
With your words I disappear from the Hideous World!
I'm in peace with your words....
                         I'm in love with your words


                                      But.....
                               Not with you!

This is how I feel the music with gentle melody and sad tone…
It let me go into deep thinking inside my the lost soul and crazy world…
I don’t write my poems so i would be labeled a poet…
I just want to smell the breath I’m taking inside me…
I just want to taste the water that dancing inside me...
I just wanted to retrieve what has been taken from me all those year...
                                       I wanted to...
                                      Love in Peace!