Why does my room suddenly feel bigger
Almost empty,
The silence of this void
So deafening
Now that you're gone?

Only one light remains here now
"11:11", the clocks beams
Its light swallowed by whatever darkness consumes the room
And the night's silence was shattered by your voice
"Make a wish", I could still hear you say

I could stand my room no longer
So, here I am outside remembering you
Or forgetting
I don't know anymore

These streets are so cold and lonesome
Without you to keep me warm
Without you counting the passing flakes
Or even joining them in their dance

Now to venture these streets
With nostalgia and madness
As my only companions

I wonder what song
was playing in your head
when you suddenly realized
that you were dead.
Shim-sham', shakin' your way
right back into the universe.
And I’m trying, just trying
to follow your breadcrumbs.

If you want me
Show me
Make me see it
Feel it
Know it
No more words for me to stumble on
No more words for me to obsess on
No more words for me to drown in
This is your chance
Throw me a preserver and bring me close
Or I shall drift to sea

"I don't know how to write
I don't know what to say anymore
I feel so empty
I no longer have a soul
Void of any light
You could say its like its nighttime inside my soul
Only difference is theres no stars or moon
To represent better times to come soon
Maybe things would've turned out differently if I tried
Tried to be better than what I am now
A loathsome and troublesome presence
So bothersome at times
I thought......I would get better
Forget this
I told you I can't write
Come to think of it.....
I was never able to do anything right."

There's no description of a lovely or dark paradise within his soul
He won't describe himself as lost and alone
Trapped in some 'dark void' or how he loves someone to the bone
All he can say is what he feels which really isn't much...
So  tell me
How to describe what you feel...
when there's nothing left to feel anymore

When I play music from my phone,
I delete songs
not because you were apart of that moment
I just don't like the left side of my chest
feeling like I'm falling out of the sky

When I'm trying to pick up the pieces...

So many things that I don't want to do
lend me some cash
and maybe a place to crash
because there's so many things
that I don't want to do.

I don't really want to go to work each day
just to sell myself and my time and my name
to gather up money that I just waste anyway
on getting wasted almost every single day.

I don't want to sleep tonight
it's just another poor way
to spend my time
when I could be smoking
or drinking red wine,
I don't want to sleep tonight.
But if I do fall asleep
I don't want to wake up on time.

I don't even want to stand at all
I'll just sit down in the hall
and stare at the walls,
I don't want to move my neck
or cash my ******* paycheck,  
has the **** sun set yet?
It'd be nice in the cool damp nights
if I didn't have to do a thing
I would be quite alright
to lay in the grass and sing.

Usually my thoughts get the best of me
But what they don't tell you is
You are not your mind
You are your emotions
Your thoughts and words manifest the way you think
not what you feel

Ancient civilizations considered words and writing a lower form of communication
because they talked to each other non-verbally
And I agree, however hypocritical that might seem

I agree because no matter how many times I write
I can never quite capture the way my heart feels
About the beauty of a sunset on a busy day
or the way the stars shine brighter on a calm and silent night
About the stray dog who loves you with all his heart because you pet him that one time
or the old man on the street who fights through his days with a smile

I can only talk and write about these things so many times
before they lose meaning in my mind
But my heart remains the same

So maybe all the 'I love you's have become redundant to my brain
but you must believe me when I say
you still have
all of my heart.